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REMINISCENCES 



Scottish Life and Chaeactee, 



eV B- RAMSAY. M.A.. LL.D.. F.R.S.E. 



DEAN OP EDINBURGH. 



FROM THE LAST EDINBURGH EDITION. 



NEW YORK : 
R. WORTHINGTON, 750 BROADWAY. 

1877. 






All rights reserved. 






CONTENTS. 



PAGE 

Introductory . xiii 

CHAPTER I. 

On Religious Feelings and Religious Observanct . 25 

CHAPTER n. 
On Old Scottish Conviviality ... . . 43 

CHAPTER HI. 
On the Old Scottish Domestic Servant .... 65 

CHAPTER IV. 

On Humour proceeding from Scottish Language, in- 
cluding Scottish Proverbs . . . . • 78 

CHAPTER V. 
On Scottish Stories of Wit and Humour , . . 148 

Concluding Remarks 266 

Alphabetical List of Proverbs .... 275 

Index 281 



AUTHOR'S NOTE 



TO 



THE AMERICAN EDITION, 



The firm of Messrs. Ticknor & Fields having arranged 
to bring out an American edition of my " Reminiscences of 
Scottish Life and Character," I may perhaps without intru- 
sion be allowed to prefix a few words to express the deep and 
sincere gratification which this proposed republication has af- 
forded me. 

The mere probability of there being a demand for an 
American reprint of such a book is of itself a sufficient proof 
that Scotland, with its many humorous and characteristic asso- 
ciations, still retains its hold upon the affections of many of 
our transatlantic brethren. I rejoice to think that the " Land 
o' Cakes " is remembered with interest in the great Republic ; 
and I have not words to express the satisfaction which I de- 
rive from the thought of contributing to the amusement of 
American citizens who feel kindly towards Scotland and Scot- 
tish reminiscences. 

No doubt there must be many families, and many individ- 
uals scattered throughout the Union, who, from ties of kindred 
or from their own recollections, will feel their hearts glow with 
emotion when they hear old Scottish stories of the last halt 
century. In a distant land, and amidst very different scenes 



vi Juthofs Note. 

and habits of life, such persons will delight to be reminded oi 
informed of quaint sayings and eccentric doings, connected 
with the past humorists of Scotland in all ranks of society — 
with her original and strong-minded old ladies — her excellent 
and simple parish ministers — her amusing parochial half daft 
idiots — her pawky lairds, and her old-fashioned and now obso- 
lete domestic servants and retainers. 

I have always myself felt a deep interest in the United States 
of America, and delighted to mark their advancement and 
progress. I have enjoyed for many years past the society of 
travellers from the States, both lay and clerical, when visiting 
the striking and beautiful Scottish metropolis ; and I now com- 
mit to the kind indulgence of my American friends and breth- 
ren these reminiscences of a country to which many of them 
must look with a warm interest as to an ancient and honoured 
land with which their own personal or ancestral feelings are 
inseparably and kindly associated. 

E. B. RAMSAY 

Edinburgh ^ October 12, i860. 



To THE Most Honourable 

JAMES ANDREUr MAR^IS OF DALHOUSIE 

K.T., P.C, &c. &c. 

My Dear Lord Dalhousie, 

/ beg permission to dedicate to you in its 
more enlarged form^ a collection of national peculiarities 
which has grown up to many times the size of the 
original lecture with which it commenced. I am quite 
conscious that the only claim which this work can have 
either to the notice of my countrymen^ or to any share 
of attention from your Lordships consists in this — that 
it is conversant with a class of anecdotes peculiar to 
Scotland — that it may tend to illustrate a species of 
humour exclusively Scottish. The object is to fix and 
preserve a page of our domestic national annals whichy 
in the eyes of the rising generation^ is fast fading into 
oblivion . 

I am happy to take any opportunity of acknowledging 



viii Dedication. 

that the long friendship of one so ahle^ so high minded^ 

and so illustrious^ as the Marquis of Dalhousie^ has 

been amongst the most honourable and gratifying inci' 

dents of a life not now a short one. But my present 

purpose is rather to present my book to a Scottish noble- 

man who has a full relish for a Scottish story^ and 

this taste^ in yourself I know to be a hereditary one^ 

for your distinguished father^ the late Earl of Dal- 

housie^ was a thorough Scotchman^ and in regard to 

such anecdotes as those which I have endeavoured to 

collect^ we may say of him {to borrow a homely expres- 

sion from the worthy Bailie Nicol farvie)^ that " he 

liket ane o* them weel, honest man / " 

/ am^ with much respect and regard. 

Tour Lordship's affectionate friend^ 

E. B. RJMSJr. 

AiNSLiE Place, Edinburgh, 
May, i860. 



PREFACE TO THE SEVENTH EDITION. 




N the Sixth Edition of the " Reminiscences 
OF Scottish Life and Character " a con- 
siderable number of fresh anecdotes were intro- 
i^^C^ duced from various sources, whilst some of those 
already adopted were corrected. In further il- 
lustration of the drinking system^ now fortunately obsolete in 
Scottish society, some details were given regarding the toasts 
and sentiments which were once considered a necessary appen- 
dage to every festive board, public or private. In the sixth 
edition, also, I was enabled to introduce some Scottish reminis- 
cences by an esteemed friend — the Rev. Dr. Clason. No one 
was better qualified for such an office ; and I feel confident that 
my readers have considered his contribution as one of che 
most interesting and important parts of the volume. 

It has been one of the most pleasing results of the favour 
with which this work has been received by my countrymen, 
that it has called forth, for edition after edition, so many kind 
communications from various quarters. Regarding the contri- 
Dutions sent to me for insertion, my rule has been to omit every 
story which I conceived might possibly give offence, whether 
from hurting the feelings of surviving relatives, trespassing upon 



X Preface, 

delicacy and moral propriety, or trenching upon the reverence 
due to sacred things. 1 have also made it a condition that my 
anecdotes should possess an essentially Scottish character, and 
that they should illustrate some phase of Scottish manners. 
These reasons have excluded many stories, some of which are 
popular and familiar, and some less generally known. I hope 
I have not offended against my own laws. I have endeavoured 
to preserve the right course in this matter of selection. I know 
that from some one or other of the above reasons, or from sev- 
eral combined, I have omitted stories which, in point and hu- 
mour, I consider among our best. 

Many anecdotes, however, have been inserted from various 
correspondents, and many suggestions have been adopted. 
Still there remain a great quantity of contributions, from which, 
no doubt, interesting materials could be selected ; and these I 
purpose to embody in a Supplement^ as a work separate from 
the present volume, but arranged under the same heads, of re- 
ligious feelings, conviviality, domestics, language and proverbs, 
wit and humour. 

From the numerous communications which I have received, 
it is quite evident that the field of inquiry for such reminiscences 
is very extensive, and I am convinced is far from being yet 
exhausted. But I fear the labourers are growing few. We 
are constantly hearing of the death of some person, who, it is 
said, was possessed of a rich store of original Scottish anecdotes, 
which have not been recorded. I would therefore take this op- 
portunity of soliciting, for the proposed supplemental volume, 
contributions from those who are interested in the subject, and 
who have, especially, experience in the dialect and humour of 
the 'west of Scotland, and of those districts with which I have 
less acquaintance. My intercourse has chiefly been confined to 
the Forfar, Kincardine, and Aberdeen districts of the country. 
1 would further suggest, for the consideration of those who may 
be kindly disposed to contribute materials towards a supple- 
mentary volume, that notices of customs and practices now ob- 



Preface. xi 

solete, which they can remember to have prevailed in society — 
like those communicated by Dr. Clason — would be a valuable 
and interesting addition to the volume. 

In calling the attention of my countrymen to their native 
Scottish dialect, with all its force and humour, I would again 
remind them of the uncertainty which hangs over the question 
of right spelling. There is no uniform rule or practice for our 
guidance. We can only follow the practice of those who are 
considered as of highest authority amongst Scottish writers. 
Amongst these, however, will be found differences of spelling. 
Kelly's work on Scottish Proverbs has always been held in high 
estimation for its correctness. But he does not seem to have 
been sufficiently careful to correct the proof sheets, as there are 
many typographical errors in his book. From these causes the 
Scotch spelling of a modern author may be found fault with, 
not because he has committed an error, but because he has fol- 
lowed a different authority from his critic. Thus, in my own 
case, a friendly reviewer of this work has objected to the story 
at page 163, line sixth, of Sixth Edition, that '''had in ' is a 
mistake in Scotch for ' hauld in.' " But for " had," I may 
quote the high authority of Allan Ramsay's " Gentle Shep- 
herd." I select two passages from several to the same effect : — 

" Sir JFilliam, like a warlock, with a beard 
Five nives in length, and white 
As driven snaw, 
Amang us came, cry'd — Had ye merry a*, 

** I'm happy now ! o'er happy ! 
Had my head ; 
This gush of pleasure's like to be 
My dead." 1 



^ Poems by Allan Ramsay. 2 vols., 4to. Edinburgh, 1728. 
Vol. ii.. pages 355, 34.9. 



xii Preface. 

X may also refer to local usage. The expression belongs to 
an Angus story, and let me further remark, that although (as I 
am quite aware) '* haud in " is pure classical Scotch, yet that 
in my country the constant pronunciation familiar to my early 
"reminiscences," was — "had east," or "had wast," "had 
in," etc., pronounced short, as if written " haddJ''' 

The portion of this work devoted to our proverbial expres- 
sions has been carefully revised, and it is with no small gratifi- 
cation that I have to acknowledge the honour of having re- 
ceived suggestions in this department from two such accom- 
plished scholars as Lord N eaves and Dr. Hannah. I am 
desirous of again taking the opportunity of expressing how 
much I owe to the valuable and judicious assistance of Mr. 
David Douglas, of the firm of Edmonston and Douglas, pub- 
lishers. His accurate knowledge of Scotch has been most 
serviceable in correcting the press, especially in the quotations 
from the older writers on Scottish proverbs. 

For such persons as may still feel an interest in a language 
which is now fast passing away, I am convinced the best mode 
of obtaining a correct knowledge of the Scottish words and 
phraseology, which constituted the pure dialect of an older gen- 
eration, is to study Jamieson's Dictionary. The progress of 
time seems only to bring forth more clearly the great research, 
the varied learning, and the accurate discrimination, of this 
remarkable national work. 



Reminiscences of 
Scottish Life and Character^ 




INTRODUCTION. 

1i ANY things connected with the Scottish 
I manners of former times are fast becom- 
§ ing obsolete, and we seem at present to 
be placed in a juncture when some Scot- 
tish traditions may be lost entirely, if not now pre- 
served. Being impressed with this truth, I made 
my own " Reminiscences of Scottish Life and Char- 
acter " the subject of a lecture, which was delivered 
as one of the series given at Ulbster Hall in 1850 
by different contributors, some of whom were 
amongst the most distinguished of our citizens. 
The idea met with so much approval, that the lect- 
ure was published. Since that time the materials 
have been growing under my hand, and I received 
many contributions on the subject, which were soon 
embodied in a second edition. The public interest 
continued, and brought forth many flattering and 



xiv Introduction, 

pleasing communications from various quarters ; and 
I would here express how deeply I have been grati- 
fied by the sympathy with which my humble en- 
deavours to exhibit a phase of Scottish social life 
have been received. I still think that it forms a 
most interesting chapter of our domestic national 
annals. In fact, if it were not presumption, I might 
be inclined to consider myself a fellow-labourer with 
Mr. Robert Chambers ; as in a very humble degree, 
and in a very limited sphere, this little volume takes 
a portion of the same field of illustration which he 
has selected. I should consider myself to have done 
well if I shall direct any of my readers to his able 
volumes. Whosoever wishes to know what this 
country really has been in times past, and to learn 
with a precision beyond what is supplied by the nar- 
ratives of history, the details of the ordinary current 
of our social, civil, and national life, must carefully 
study the " Domestic Annals of Scotland." Never 
before were a nation's domestic features so thor- 
oughly portrayed. Of those features the specimens 
of quaint Scottish humour still remembered are un- 
like anything else, but they are fast becoming obso- 
lete, and my motive for this publication has been an 
endeavour to preserve marks of the past, which 
would of themselves soon become obliterated, and 
to supply the rising generation with pictures of social 
life, faded and indistinct to their eyes, but the strong 
lines of which an older race still remember. By 
thus coming forward at a favourable moment, no 



Introduction. xv 

Joubt many beautiful specimens of Scottish Min- 
strelsy have in this mariner been preserved from 
oblivion by the timely exertions of Bishop Percy, 
Ritson, Walter Scott, and Professor Aytoun. Lord 
Macaulay, in his preface to " The Lays of Ancient 
Rome," shows very pow^erfully the tendency of all 
that lingers in the memory to become obsolete, and 
he does not hesitate to say that " Sir Walter Scott 
was \i\it jmi in time to save the precious relics of the 
minstrelsy of the Border." 

We have just received a testimony to the value oi 
our Scottish language from the illustrious Chancellor 
of the University of Edinburgh, the force and au- 
thority of w^hich no one will be disposed to question. 
Lord Brougham, in speaking of improvements upon 
the English language, makes these striking re- 
marks : — 

*' The pure and classical language of Scodand must on no 
account be regarded as a provincial dialect, any more than 
French was so regarded in the reign of Henry V., or Italian in 
that of the first Napoleon, or Greek under the Roman Empire. 
Nor is it to be in any manner of way considered as a corruption 
of the Saxon ; on the contrary, it contains much of the old 
and genuine Saxon, with an intermixture from the Northern 
nations, as Danes and Norse, and some, though a small portion, 
from the Celtic. But in whatever way composed, or from 
whatever sources arising, it is a national language, used by the 
whole people in their early years, by many learned and gifted 
persons throughout life, and in which are written the laws of 
the Scotch, their judicial proceedings, their ancient history, 
above all, their poetry. 

** There can be no doubt that bhe English language would 



xvi Introduction. 

greatly gain by being enriched with a number both of words 
and of phrases, or turns of expression, now peculiar to the 
Scotch. It was by such a process that the Greek became the 

first of tongues, as well written as spoken 

" Would it not afford means of enriching and improving the 
English language, if full and accurate glossaries of improved 
Scotch words and phrases — those successfully used by the best 
writers, both in prose and verse — were given, with distinct ex- 
planation and reference to authorities ? This has been done in 
France and other countries, where some dictionaries accompany 
the English, in some cases with Scotch synonymes, in others 
with varieties of expression." Installation Address^ P- 63. 

My esteemed friend, Lord Neaves, who, it is well 
known, combines, with his great legal knowledge 
and high literary acquirements, a keen sense of the 
humorous, has sometimes pleasantly complained of 
my drawing so many of my specimens of Scottish 
humour from sayings and doings of Scottish minis- 
ters. There can be no doubt that the older school 
of our national clergy supply some most amusing 
anecdotes. They were a shrewd and observant 
race. They lived amongst their own people from 
year to year, and knew well the Scottish type of 
character. Their retired habits and familiar inter- 
course with their parishioners, gave rise to many 
quaint and racy communications. They were ex- 
cellent men, well suited to their pastoral work, and 
did much good amongst their congregations ; for it 
should be always remembered that a national church 
requires a sympathy and resemblance between the 
pastors and the flocks. Both will be found to 



Introduction. xvii 

change together. Nothing could be further f/om 
my mind in recording these stories, than the idea of 
casting ridicule upon such an order of men. My 
own feelings as a Scotchman, with all their ancestral 
associations, lead me to cherish their memory with 
pride and deep interest. I may appeal also to the 
fact that many contributions to this volume are vol- 
untary offerings from distinguished clergymen of the 
Church of Scotland, as well as of the Free Church 
and of other Presbyterian communities. Indeed, no 
persons enjoy these stories more than ministers 
themselves. I recollect many years ago travelling 
to Perth in the old stage-coach days, and enjoying 
the society of a Scottish clergyman, who was a most 
amusing companion, and full of stories, the quaint 
humour of which accorded with his own disposition. 
When we had come through Glen Farg, my com- 
panion pointed out that we were in the parish of 
Dron. With much humour he introduced an anec- 
dote of a brother minister not of a brilliant order of 
mind, who had terminated in this place a course of 
appointments in the Church, the names of which, at 
least, were of an ominous character for a person of 
unimaginative temperament. The worthy man had 
been brought up at the school of Dunse — had been 
made assistant at Dull^ a parish near Aberfeldy, in 
the Piesbytery of Weem, and had here ended his 
days and his clerical career as minister of Dron, 

Sir Walter Scott, in the dedication to the King 
(George the Fourth) of his collected edition of the 



xviii Introduction. 

•Vaverley Novels, views with much complacency the 
;^ct that " the perusal of them has been supposed, 
in some instances, to have succeeded in amusing 
hours of relaxation, or relieving those of languor, 
pain, or anxiety." No doubt it is a source of allow- 
able satisfaction to an author to think that he has in 
any degree, even the lowest and most humble, con- 
tributed to the innocent recreation of a world where 
sorrow and distress so generally prevail. The work 
of preparing these Reminiscences has sometimes 
succeeded in drawing off the mind of the author 
from sad and painful recollections of his own domes- 
tic trials, and he may perhaps be permitted to state, 
that in several cases he has received assurance that 
these pages have beguiled an hour of languor and de- 
bility ; that they have recalled many pleasant asso- 
ciations with the past, and have given a permanent 
and agreeable impression of a pleasantry and humour 
exclusively and essentially of a Scottish type and 
character. 

I wish it to be distinctly understood that these 
desultory records were never intended to treat of the 
changes which have taken place amongst us during 
the last half century, in literature or philosophy, in 
laws, commerce, manufactures, or in the deeper 
phases of our national character. I treat of changes 
and of transitions which lie rather upon the surface 
of social life. In fact, I speak of what, to a great 
degree, I can verify from my own experience — 
what I have not seen and known in my own person 



Introductwji, xix 

I generally narrate from the direct testimony of 
others. I can myself go back in memory for fifty 
years ; and therefore these observations, trivial and 
superficial as they may be, I might name, in imita- 
tion of my distinguished great-great-great-uncle, 
Bishop Burnett, and call them " Memoirs of my 
own Time," or, more correctly, to follow a recent 
example of collected reminiscences (that of the late 
lamented Lord Cockburn), '^ Memorials of my 
Time." I have recorded the remarks following in 
the way of an experiment^ hoping that it might form 
a precedent or example for others to take up the 
question of changes amongst us, and for those to 
state results of their observation who have had far 
more experience than I have (as I was only an occa- 
sional visitor to my own country from the age of 
eight to the age of thirty), who have more opportu- 
nities of judging, and who are possessed of far better 
powers of description. As Lord Cockburn has ob- 
served, " A change has been going on for a long 
time " " The feelings and habits which had pre- 
vailed at the Union, and which had left so many 
picturesque peculiarities on the Scottish character, 
could not survive the enlarged intercourse with Eng- 
land and the world." Much of this change had of 
course taken place before any of the present genera- 
tion can remember. Much has been done in my 
own recollection, and now there remains only com- 
paratively the slighter shades of difl-'erence to be 
assimilated, and soon there will be little to notice. 



XX Introduction. 

Now, a subject like this can only be illustrated by a 
copious application of anecdotes which must show 
the features of the past. And let me premise that I 
make use of anecdotes not for the purpose of telling 
a good story, but solely in the way of illustration. I 
am quite certain that there was an originality, a dry 
and humorous mode of viewing persons and events 
quite peculiar to the older Scottish characters. And 
I am equally certain, that their peculiar humour can 
only be exhibited in examples. I have just been 
supplied by two much valued and kind friends, with 
anecdotes highly illustrative of what I have endeav- 
oured to record ; from Mr. Erskine of Linlathan 1 
have received the following : — iMr. Erskine recol- 
lects an old housekeeper at Airth who belonged to 
this class of character. A speech of this Mrs. Hen- 
derson was preserved in the family as having been 
made by her at the time of the execution of Louis 
XVI. in 1793. She was noticing the violent emo- 
tions exhibited by Mr. Bruce of Kinnaird, the Abys- 
sinian traveller, at the sad event which had just 
taken place, and added, in the following quaint and 
caustic terms, " There's Kinnaird greeting as if 
there were nae a saunt on earth but himsell and the 
king o' France." How utterly unlike anything that 
would be said on such an occasion by an English 
person in the same position in life ! 

The other anecdote (which has just been sent by 
a kind correspondent from Aberdeenshire) is neces- 
sarily omitted in its proper place amongst the Betbe- 



Introduction, xxi 

rail stories. But I am unwilling to lose it. It seems 
to me to possess more than the ordinary amount of 
those racy qualities which so often distinguished the 
older class of Scottish parish functionaries. The 
story is recorded as having been told by the late 
Rev. Alexander AUardice, minister of Forgue in 
Aberdeenshire, who possessed an unusual vein of 
dry caustic humour, and who told stories of that 
description in a most relishable way. 

A neighbouring minister was to assist Mr. Al- 
lardice, and arrived at the manse on Saturday, where 
he was to sleep, and take the duty on Sunday follow- 
ing. He was a conceited youth — a frothy declama- 
tory preacher — and, as a stranger, anxious to make 
a great sensation in 'the county. After dinner, he 
strolled out into the churchyard, and encountered 
John the beddal and parish oracle engaged in digging 
a grave — and much of a humourist in his way — 
moreover, a formidable critic of the theological 
soundness of the neighbouring ministers. Our 
young divine having been very recently placed^ sup- 
posed himself to be personally unknown to the Forgue 
functionary. Accordingly he began to pump beddal 
John as to the opinion held of the brethren around 
who had assisted at Forgue. To query after query 
John gave out his unvarying oracular response, " Na, 
sir, we dinna like him ; he's nae soun' " — and " we 
dinna like him eather ; he^s nae soun'," clinching 
every decision with the " yerk " of a spadeful of 
earth on the grave's brink. At last the reverend 



xxii Introduction, 

pumper having exhausted the circle of his brethren 
of the Presbytery, and secretly gratified, no doubt, 
with this summary and unqualified testimony against 
them, anxious to hear what was thought in the coun- 
try side about himself, where he rather flattered him- 
self he was creating a sensation, and trusting to his 
incognito (though John was perfectly aware who his 
coUoquist was), ventured to ask, " Well, now, the 

parish of has got a famous preacher, the Rev. 

Mr. what do you think of him ? is he ' soun' ' ? '* 

" 'Od, sir," replied John, with a sly twinkle, and rest- 
ing for a moment on his spade, " I hinna heard him 
mysel' ; but folk that hae, say hes a' soun' ^ John 
recommenced digging with redoubled diligence, and 
exit the reverend querist, feeling, we may fancy, 
rather small. 

If my anecdotes should occasionally excite amuse- 
ment or even laughter, there is no harm done ; but 
let it be remembered this is not the object. The 
object, as I say, is to show what the past referred to 
really was. In short, whatever tends to illustrate 
changes — to mark times that are gone — I have 
not hesitated to use. 

We have now, therefore, to deal with c< mmon 
events and with changes which, though in them- 
selves often deep and important, yet appear to the 
observer to affect only what is external ; and as we 
must have some classification or arrangement of the 
subjects on which these changes are to be marked, I 
would propose to record some Reminiscences on the 
following subjects : — 



Introduction, xxiii 

I. On religious feelings and religious observances. 

II, On old Scottish conviviality. 

III. On the old Scottish domestic servant. 

IV. On humour proceeding from Scottish language, 

including Scottish proverbs. 
V. On Scottish stories of wit and humour. 



CHAPTER I. 

On Religious Feelings and Religious 
Observances, 




N this subject we would speak with def- 
erence. We have no intention of en- 
tering, in this volume, upon those great 
questions which are connected with re- 
cent church movements amongst us, or with national 
peculiarities of faith and discipline. It is impossible, 
however, to overlook entirely the fact of a gradual 
relaxation having gone on for some years, of the 
sterner features of the Calvinistic school of theology, 
— at any rate, of keeping its theoretic peculiarities 
more in the background. What we have to notice, 
in these pages are changes in the feelings with regard 
to religion and religious observances, which have ap- 
peared upon the exterior of society— -the changes 
which belong to outward habits rather than to inter- 
nal feelings. Of such changes many have taken 
place within my own experience. Scotland has ever 
home the character of a moral and religious coun- 
2 



26 Reminiscences of 

try ; and the mass of the people are a more church- 
going race than the masses of English population. 
I am not at all prepared to say that in the middle 
and lower ranks of life, our countrymen have under- 
gone much change in regard to religious observances. 
But there can be no question that amongst the upper 
classes there are manifestations connected with relig- 
ion now, which some years ago were not thought of. 
The attendance of men on public worship is of itself 
an example of the change we speak of. I am afraid 
that when Walter Scott described Monkbarns as be- 
ing with difficulty " hounded out " to hear the ser- 
mons of good Mr. Blattergowl, he w^rote from a 
knowledge of the habits of church-going then gen- 
erally prevalent amongst Scottish lairds. The late 
Bishop Sandford told me that when he first came to 
Edinburgh — I suppose fifty years ago — ^qw gentle- 
men attended church — very few indeed were seen 
at the communion — so much so that it was a mat- 
ter of conversation when a male communicant, not 
an aged man, was observed at the table for the first 
time. Sydney Smith, when preaching in Edinburgh 
some forty years ago, seeing how almost exclusively 
congregations were made up of ladies, took for his 
text the verse from the Psalms, " Oh that men 
would therefore praise the Lord ; " and with that 
touch of the facetious which marked everything he 
did, laid the emphasis on the word " men." Look 
ing round the congregation and saying, " Oh that 
men would therefore praise the Lord," implying that 



Scottish Life ^ Character, * 27 

he used the word, not to describe the human species 
generally, but the male individuals as distinguished 
from the female pouion. In regard to attendance 
by young men, both at church and communion, a 
marked change has taken place in my own experi- 
ence. In fact, there is an attention excited tow- 
ards church subjects, which, thirty years ago, woula 
have been hardly credited. Nor is it only in con- 
nection with churches and church services that these 
changes have been brought forth, but an interest has 
been raised on the subject from Bible societies, 
missionary associations at home and abroad, schools 
and reformatory institutions, most of which, as re- 
gard active operation, have grown up during fifty 
years. 

Nor should I omit to mention, what I trust may 
be considered as a change belonging to religious feel- 
ing, viz., that conversation is now conducted without 
that accompaniment of absurd and unmeaning oaths 
which was really once considered an essential embel- 
lishment of polite discourse. I distinctly recollect 
an elderly gentleman, when describing the opinion 
of a refined and polished female upon a particular 
point, putting into her mouth an unmistakeable 
round oath as the natural language in which people's 
sentiments and opinions would be ordinarily con- 
veyed. This is a change wrought in men's feelings, 
which all must, hail with great pleasure. Putting 
out of sight for a moment the sin of such a practice, 
and the bad influence it must have had upon all 



28 , Reminncences of 

emotions of reverence for the name and attributes of 
the Divine Being, and the natural effect of profane 
swearing, '' to harden a' v/ithin," v^^e might marvel 
at the utter folly and incongruity of making the 
practice an expression of anger, of surprise, or of 
using oaths as mere expletives in common discourse. 
A quaint anecdote, descriptive of such senseless 
ebullition, I have from a friend v^ho mentioned the 
names of parties concerned : — A late Dulce of 
Athole had invited a well-known character, a writer 
of Perth, to come up and meet him at Dunkeld for 
the transaction of some business. The Duke men- 
tioned the day and hour when he should receive the 
man of law, who accordingly came punctually at the 
appointed time and place. But the Duke had for- 
gotten the appointment, and gone to the hill, from 
which he could not return for some hours. A high- 
lander present described the Perth writer's indigna- 
tion, and his mode of shewingjt, by a most elaborate 
course of swearing. '* But whom did he swear 
at ? " was the inquiry made of the narrator, who re- 
plied, " Ou, he didna sweer at ony thing parteecular, 
but juist stude in ta middle of ta road and swoor at 
lairge." I have from a friend also an anecdote 
which shews how entirely at one period the practice 
of swearing had become familiar even to female ears 
when mixed up with the intercourse of social life. 
A sister had been speaking of her brother as much 
addicted to this habit — "Our John sweers awfu*, 
and we try to correct him ; but," she added in a 



Scottish Life cf LLaracter. ig 

candid and apologetic tone, " nae doubt it is a great 
set afF to conversation.'* 

This is the place to notice changes which have 
taken place in regard to the questions of taste in the 
building and embellishing Scottish places of worship 
generally. Some years back there was a great jeal- 
ousy of ornament in connection with churches and 
church services, and, in fact, all such embellishments 
were considered as marks of a departure from the 
simplicity of old Scottish worship, — they were dis- 
tinctive of Episcopacy as opposed to the severer 
modes of Presbyterianism. The late Sir William 
Forbes used to give an account of a conversation, 
indicative of this feeling, which he had overheard 
between an Edinburgh inhabitant and his friend from 
the country. They were passing St. John's, which 
had just been finished, and the countryman asked, 
" Whatna kirk was that ! " ^' Oh," said the towns- 
man, "that is an English chapel," meaning Episco- 
palian. " Ay," said his friend, "there'll be walth o' 
images there." But, if unable to sympathize with 
architectural church ornament and embellishment, 
how much less could they sympathize with the per- 
formance of divine service, which included such 
musical accompaniments as intoning, chanting, and 
anthems ? On the first introduction of Tractarian- 
ism into Scotland, the full choir service had been 
establi-^hed in an Episcopal church, where a noble 
family had adopted those views, and carried them 
out regardless of expense. The lady who had been 



'lO Reminiscences of 

instrumental in getting up these musical services was 
very anxious that a favourite female servant of the 
family — a Presbyterian of the old school — should 
have an opportunity of hearing them ; accordingly, 
she very kindly took her down to church in the car- 
riage, and on returning asked her what she thought 
of the music, etc., " Ou, it's varra bonny, varra 
bonny ; but oh, my lady, it's an awfu' way of spend- 
ing the Sabbath." The good woman could only 
look upon the whole thing as a musical performance. 
The organ was a great mark of distinction between 
Episcopalian and Presbyterian places of worship. I 
have heard of an old lady describing an Episcopalian 
clergyman, without any idea of disrespect, in these 
terms : — " Oh, he is a whistle-kirk minister." Of 
late years, however, a spirit of greater tolerance of 
such things has been growing up amongst us, — a 
greater tolerance, 1 suspect, even of organs and litur- 
gies. In fact, we may say a new era has begun in 
Scotland as to church architecture and church orna- 
ments. The use of stained glass, and the restora- 
tion of ancient edifices, indicate a revolution of 
feeling regarding this question. Beautiful and ex- 
pensive churches are rising everywhere, and belong- 
ing to all denominations. It is not long since the 
building or re.pairing a new church, or the repairing 
and adapting an old church, implied in Scotland sim- 
plv a production of the greatest possible degree of 
ugliness and bad taste at the least possible expense, 
and certainly never included any notion of orri-ament 



Scottish Life ^ Character, 31 

in the details. Now, large sums are expended on 
places of worship without reference to creed. 
First-rate architects are employed. Fine Gothic 
structures are produced. The rebuilding of the 
Greyfriars' Church, the restoration of South Leith 
Church and of Glasgow Cathedral, the very bold 
experiment of adopting a style little known amongst 
us, the pure Lombard, in a church for Dr. W. L. 
Alexander, on George IV. Bridge, Edinburgh ; the 
really splendid Free Church now erecting in Albany 
Street, with a Gothic mansion attached, and many 
similar cases, mark the spirit of the times regarding 
the application of what is beautiful in art to the ser- 
vice of religion. One might hope that changes such 
as these in the feelings, tastes, and associations, 
would have a beneficial effect in bringing the wor- 
shippers themselves into a more genial spirit of for- 
bearance with each other. A friend of mine used 
to tell a story of an honest builder's views of church 
differences, which was very amusing, and quaintly 
professional. An English gentleman, who had ar- 
rived in a Scottish country town, was walking about 
to examine the various objects which presented 
themselves, and observed two rather handsome 
places of worship in course of erection nearly op- 
posite to each other. He addressed a person, who 
happened to be the contractor for the chapels, and 
asked, " What was the difference between these 
two places of worship which were springing up so 
close to each other?" — meaning:, of course, the 



32 Reminiscences of 

difFerence of the theological tenets of the two con- 
gregations. The contractor, who thought only of 
architectural differences, innocently replied, " There 
may be a difference of sax feet in length, but there's 
no aboon a icw inches in the breadth." Would 
that all our religious differences could be brought 
within so narrow a compass ! 

It might be a curious question to consider how 
far motives founded on mere taste or sentiment may 
have operated in creating an interest towards relig- 
ion, and in making it a more prominent and popular 
question than it was in the early portion of the 
present century. There are in this country two 
causes which have combined in producing these 
effects : — ist. The great disruption which took 
place in the Church of Scotland no doubt called 
forth an attention to the subject which stirred up the 
public, and made religion at any rate a topic of deep 
interest for discussion and for partizansbip- Men's 
minds were not allowed to remain in the torpid con- 
dition of a past generation. 2d. The aesthetic move- 
ment in religion, which some years since was made 
in England, has, of course, had its influence in Scot- 
land,, and many who shewed little concern about 
religion, whilst it was merely a question of doctrines, 
of precepts, and of worship, threw themselves keenly 
into the question when it became associated with 
ceremonial, and music, and high art. New ecclesi- 
astical associations have been presented to Scottish 
tastes and feelings. With some minds, attachment 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 33 

to the church is attachment to her Gregorian tones, 
jewelled chalices, lighted candles, embroidered altar- 
cloths, silver crosses, processions, copes, albs, and 
chasubles. But from whatever cause it proceeds, a 
great change has taken place in the general interest 
excited towards ecclesiastical questions. Religion 
now has numerous associations with the ordinary- 
current of huinan life. In times past it was kept 
more as a thing apart. There was a false delicacy 
which made people shrink from encountering appel- 
lations that were usually bestowed upon those who 
made a more prominent appearance than the world 
at large, in regard to a religious profession, 

A great change has taken place in this respect 
with persons of all shades of religious opinions. 
With an increased attention to the externals of relig- 
ion, we believe that in many points the heart is more 
exercised also. Take, as an example, the practice 
of family prayer. Many excellent and pious house- 
holds of the former generation would not venture 
upon the observance, 1 am afraid, because they were 
in dread of the sneer. There was a foolish applica- 
tion of the terms " Methodist," " saints," " over- 
righteous," where the practice was observed. It 
was to take up a rather decided position in the 
neighbourhood, and I can testify, that less than fifty 
years ago, a family would have been marked and 
talked of for a usage of which now throughout the 
country the exception is rather the unusual circum- 
stance. A little anecdote from recollections in my 

3 



34 Re?mniscences of 

own family will Furnish a good illustration of a state 
of feeling on this point now happily unknown. \\\ 
a northern town of the east coast, where the earliest 
recollections of my life go back, there was usually a 
detachment of a regiment, who were kindly received 
and welcomed to the society, which in the winter 
months was very full and very gay. There was the 
usual measure of dining, dancing, supping, card- 
playing, and gossiping, which prevailed in country 
towns at the time. The officers were of course an 
object of much interest to the natives, and their 
habits were much discussed. A friend was staying 
in the family who partook a good deal of the Athe- 
nian temperament, viz., a delight in hearing and 
telling some new thing. On one occasion she burst 
forth in great excitement with the intelligence that 
" Sir Nathaniel Duckinfield, the officer in command 
of the detachment, had family prayers every morn- 
ing ! " A very near and dear relative of mine, 
knowing the tendency of the lady to gossip, pulled 
her up with the exclamation : " How can you re- 
peat such things. Miss Ogilvy ; nothing in the 
world but the ill-natured stories of Montrose ! ! " 
The remark was made quite innocently and uncon- 
sciously of the bitter satire it conveyed upon the 
feeling of the place. The " ill-nature '* of these 
stories was true enough, because ill-nature was the 
motive of those who raised them ; not because it is 
an ill-natured thing of itself to say of a family that 
they have household worship, but the ill-nature con- 



Scottish Life c^" Character. 35 

sisted in their intending to throw out a sneer and a 
sarcasm upon a subject where all such reflections are 
unbecoming and indecorous. It is one of the best 
proofs of change of habits and associations on this 
matter, that the anecdote, exquisite as it is for oui 
purpose, will hardly be understood by many of our 
young friends, or, at least, happily has lost much of 
its force and pungency. 

These remarks apply to the state of religious feel 
ing amongst the upper classes of society. 1 am not 
aware of much change in the religious habits of the 
Scottish peasantry — perhaps the elders have yielded 
something from the sternness of David Deans. But, 
as compared with the corresponding class in P^ng- 
land, there are many circumstances to distinguish 
the theological tenets and strict observance of relio-- 
ious ordinances of the Scottish from the usual feel- 
ings of the English peasant. 

The kindly feelings and interest of the pastoral 
relation always formed a very pleasing intercourse 
between minister and people. I have received from 
an anonymous correspondent an anecdote illustrative 
of this happy connection, for which he vouches as 
authentic : — 

John Brown, Burgher minister at Whitburn (son 
of the commentator, and father of the late Rev. 
Di. John Brown of Edinburgh, and grandfather of 
the present accomplished M. D. of the same name, 
author of " Rab and his Friends," etc.), in the early 
part of the century was travelling on a small sheltie ^ 

A A Shetland pony. 



36 Reminiscejices of 

to attend the summer sacrament at Haddington. 
Between Musselburgh and Tranent he overtook one 
of his own people. " What are ye dain' here, Ja- 
net, and whaur ye gaun in this warm wather ? " 
" Deed sir," quo' Janet, '' I'm gaun to Haddington 
for the occasion^ an' expeck to hear ye preach this 
efternoon." " Very weel, Janet, but whaur ye 
gaun to sleep ? " " i dinna ken, sir, but Providence 
is aye kind, an'll provide a bed." On Mr. Brown 
jogged, and after service in the afternoon, before 
pronouncing the blessing, he said from the pulpit, 
" Whaur's the auld wifie that followed me frae 
Whitburn ? " " Here Pm sir," uttered a shrill 
voice from a back seat. '^ x'^weel," said Mr. Brown, 
•^' I have fand ye a bed ; ye're to sleep wi' Johnnie 
P"^ife's lass." 

There was at all times amongst the older Scottish 
peasantry a bold assertion of their religious opinions, 
and strong expression of their feelings. The spirit 
of the Covenanters lingered amongst the aged people 
whom I remember, but which time has considerably 
softened down. We have some recent authentic in- 
stances of this readiness in Scotchmen to bear testi- 
mony to their principles — 

A friend has informed me that the late Lord 
Rutherfurd often told with much interest of a re- 
buke which he received from a shepherd, near 
Bonally, amongst the Pentlands. He had entered 
into conversation with him, and was complaining 

1 The Lord's Supper 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 37 

bitterly of the weather, which prevented him enjoy- 
ing his visit to the country, and said hastily and 

unguardedly, " What a d d mist ! " and then 

expressed his wonder how or for what purpose there 
should have been such a thing created as east wind. 
The shepherd, a tall, grim figure, turned sharp 
round upon him. '' What ails you at the mist, sir ; 
it weets the sod, it slockens the yowes, and " — 
adding with much solemnity — '' it's God's wull ;" 
and turned away with lofty indignation. Lord 
Rutherfurd used to repeat this with much candour 
as a fine specimen of rebuke from a sincere and 
simple mind. 

Something like this is reported of an eminent pro- 
fessor of geology, who, visiting in the Highlands, 
met an old man on the hills on Sunday morning. 
The professor, partly from the effect of habit, and 
not adverting to the very strict notions on Sabbath 
desecration entertained in Ross-shire, had his pocket 
hammer in hand, and v/as thoughtlessly breaking the 
specimens of minerals he picked up by the way. 
The old man for some time eyed the geologist, and 
going up to him, quietly said, " Sir, ye're breaking 
something there forbye the stanes ! " 

The same feeling under a more fastidious form 
was exhibited to a traveller by a Scottish peasant: — 
An English artist travelling professionally through 
Scotland had occasion to remain over Sunday in a 
small town in the north. To whde away the time, 
he walked out a short way in the environs, where 



38 Reminiscences of 

the picturesque ruin of a castle met his eye. He 
asked a countryman who was passing to be so good 
as tell him the name of the castle. The reply was 
somewhat startling — "It's no the day to be speer- 
ing sic things ! " 

A manifestation of even still greater strictness, on 
the subject of Sabbath desecration, I have received 
from a relative of the family in which it occurred. 
About fifty years ago the Hon. iMrs. Stewart lived 
in Heriot Row, who had a cook, Jeannie by name, 
a paragon of excellence. One Sunday morning 
when her daughter (afterwards Lady Eicon) went 
into the kitchen, she was surprised to find a new 
jack (recently ordered, and which was constructed 
on the prmciple of going ccmstantly without winding 
up), wholly paralyzed and useless. Miss Stewart 
naturally inquired what accident had happened to 
the new jack, as it had stopped. The mystery was 
soon solved by Jeannie indignantly exclaiming that 
" she was nae gaeing to hae the fule thing clocking 
and tinning about in her kitchen a' the blessed Sab- 
bath day." 

There sometimes appears to have been in our 
countrymen an undue preponderance of zeal f(^r 
Sabbath observance as compared with the impor- 
tance attached to other com.mands, and especially as 
compared with the virtue of sobriety. 71ie follow- 
ing^ dialogue between Mr. M of Glasgow, the 

celebrated artist, and an old highland acquaintance 
whom he had met with unexpectedly, will illustrate 



Scottish Life ^' Character. 35 

the contrast between the severity of judgment passed 
upon treating the Sabbath with levity and the h'ghter 
censure attached to indulgence in whisky. Mr. 

M begins : — " Donald, what brought you 

here ? '* '' Ou, weel, sir, it was a baad place yon ; 
they were baad folk — but they're a God-fearin' set o' 
folk here!" " Well, Donald," said Mr. M., " I'm 
glad to hear it." " Ou ay, sir, 'deed are they; an' 
I'll gie ye an instance o't. Last Sabbath, just as the 
kirk was skailin', there was a drover chield frae Dum- 
fries comin' along the road whustlin', an' lookin' as 
happy as if it was ta muddle o' the week ; weel, sir, 
oor laads is a God-fearin' set o' laads, an' they were 
just comin' oot o' the kirk — od they yokit upon 
him, an' a'most killed him I " Mr. M., to whom 
their zeal seemed scarcely sufficiently well directed 
to merit his approbation, then asked Donald whether 
it had been drunkenness that induced the depravity 
of his former neighbours ? *' Weel, weel, sir," said 
Donald, with some hesitation, " //2^^-bee ; I'll no 
say but it micht." " Depend upon it," said Mr. 
M., " it's a bad thing, whisky." " Weel, weel, 
sir, replied Donald, " I'll no say but it may ;" add- 
ing in a very decided tone — " speeciallie baad 
whusky! " 

The Scottish peasantry of the older school de- 
lighted in expositions of doctrinal subjects, and in 
fact were extremely jealous of any minister who 
departed from their high standard of orthodox divin- 
ity, by selecting subjects which involved discussions 



4-0 Reminiscences of 

of strictly moral or practical questions. A worthy 
old clergyman having, upon the occasion oF a com- 
munion Monday, taken a text of such a character, 
was thus commented on by an ancient dame of the 
congregation, who was previously acquainted with 
his'style of^ discourse ; — "if there's an ill text in a' 
the Bible, that creetur's aye sure to talc it." 

It may be well supposed that a peasantry with 
such religious opinions would be much shocked at 
any persons whose principles were known to be of 
an mficlel character. 7'h'ere is a story traditionary in 
Edinburcj;h reo-ardincr David Hume, which illustrates 
this feeling in a very amiusing manner, and which 1 
have heard it said, Hume himself often narrated. 
I'he philosopher had fallen from the path into the 
swamp at the back of the Castle, the existence of 
which 1 recollect hearing of from old persons forty 
years ago. He fairly stuck fast, and called to a 
woman who was passing, and begged her assistance. 
She passed on apparently without attending to the 
request ; at his earnest entreaty, however, she came 
where he was, and asked him, " Are na ye Hume 
the Atheist ?" " Well, well, no matter," said 
Hume j " Christian charity commands you to do 
good to every one." " Christian charity here, or 
Christian there," replied the woman, " I'll do nae- 
thing for you till ye turn a Christian yersell — ye maun 
repeat the Lord's Prayer and the Creed, or faith I'll 
let ye grafel ^ there as I fand ye." The sceptic, 
1 Lie in a grovelling attitude. See Jamieson. 



Scottsih Life ^' Cuaractcr, 41 

really afraid for his life, rehetirsed the required for- 
mulas. 

The feelings on such subjects entertained by the 
inhabitants ot our crowded cities, vvynds, and closes, 
are no criterion of the national religious character. 
It is a great difficulty to get them to attend Divine 
worship at all, as many circumstances combine to 
break ofF all associations with public services. 

A lady, who is most active in visiting the houses 
of these outcasts from the means of grace, gives me 
an amusing instance of Self-complacency arising 
from such attendance. She was visiting in the West 
Port, not far from the church established by my 
illustrious friend the late Dr. Chalmers. Having 
asked a poor woman if she ever attended it f)r 
Divine service — '' Ou ay," she replied ^ '■'there's 
a man ca'd Chalmers preaches there, and I whiles 
gang in and hear him, just to encourage him, puir 
body ! " 

From the religious opinions of a people, the 
transition is natural to their political partialities. 
One great political change has passed over Scotland, 
which none now living can hardly be said to have 
actually witnessed -, but they remember those who 
were contemporaries of the anxious scenes of '45, 
and many of us have known determined and thor- 
ou'j;h Jacobites. The poetry of that political period 
still remain^, and we hear but as pleasant songs, 
those words and melodies which stirred the hearts 
and excited the deep enthusiasm of a past genera- 



42 Rcminncences etc. 

tlon. But Jacobite anecdotes are fading from our 
knowledge. To many young persons they are 
unknown. Of these stories illustrative of Jacobite 
feelings and enthusiasm, many are of a character not 
fit for me to record. The good old ladies who 
were violent partisans of the Stuarts had little hesi- 
tation in referring without reserve to the future and 
eternal destiny of William of Orange. One anec- 
dote which I had from a near relative of the family 
may be adduced in illustration of the powerful hold 
which the cause had upon the views and consciences 
of Jacobites. 

A former Mr. Stirling of Keir had favoured the 
Stuart cause, and had in fact attended a muster of 
forces at the Brig of Turk in the year 1708. This 
symptom of a rising against the Government occa- 
sioned some uneasiness, and the authorities were 
very active in their endeavours to discover who were 
the leaders of the movement. Keir was suspected. 
The miller of Keir was brought forward as a wit- 
ness, and swore positively that the Laird was not 
present. Now, as it was well known that he was 
there, and that the miller knew it, a neighbour asked 
him privately when he came out of the witness-box, 
how he could on oath assert such a falsehood. The 
miller replied, quite undaunted, and with a feeling 
of confidence in the righteousness of his cause 
approaching the sublime — "1 would rather trust 
my soul to God's mercy than trust Keir's head into 
their hands." 



CHAPTER n. 



On Old Scottish Conviviality. 




HE next change in manners which has 
Nl^ been effected in the memory of many 
now living, regards the habits of conviv- 
iality, or, to speak more plainly, regards 
the banishment of drunkenness from polite society. 
It is indeed a most important and a blessed change. 
But it is a change the full extent of which many per- 
sons now alive have little conception of. It is hardly 
possible to realize the scenes which took place in 
society fifty years back, or even less. In many 
houses, when a party dined, the ladies going away 
was the signal for the commencement of a system 
of compulsory conviviality. No one was allowed to 
shirk — no daylight — no heeltaps — was the wretched 
jargon in which were expressed the propriety and 
the duty of seeing that the glass, when filled, must 
be emptied and drained. We have heard of glasses 
having the bottoms knocked ofF, so that no shuffling 



44 Reminiscences of 

tricks might be played with them, and that they 
could only be put down — empty. 

Some relatives of mine travelling in the High- 
lands were amused by observing in a small road-side 
public-house the use of such an implement of con- 
viviality, which called forth that quaint, humorous 
manner which is so thoroughly Scottish. Three 
drovers had met too;ether and were celebrating their 
meeting by a liberal consumption of whisky ; they 
filled their one glass without bottom and passed it 
on from one to another ; one queer-looking pawky 
chield, whenever the glass came to his turn, remarked 
most gravely, '' I think we wadna be the waur of 
some water," taking care, however, never to add any 
of the simple element, but quietly drank ofF his. glass. 

The scenes of excess which occurred in the 
houses where deep drinking was practised must have 
been most revolting to sober persons who were un- 
accustomed to such conviviality; as in the case of 
a drinking Angus laird, entertaining as his guest a 
London merchant of formal manners and temperate 
habits. The poor man was driven from the table 
when the drinking set in hard, and stole away to 
take refuge in his bed-room. The company, how- 
ever, were determined not to let the worthy citizen 
ofF so easily, but proceeded in a body, with the laird 
at their head, and inviided his privacy by exhibiting 
bottles and glasses at his bed-side. Losing ail 
patience, the wretched victim gasped out his indig- 
nation, — "Sir, your hospitality borders upon bru- 



Scottish Life c^ Character. 45 

tality." It must have had a fatal influence also on 
many persons to whom drinking was most injurious, 
and who were yet not strong-minded enough to 
resist the temptations to excess. Poor James Bos- 
well, who certainly required no extraordinary urging 
to take a glass too much, is found, in his letters 
which have recently come to light, laying the blame 
of his excesses to '' falling into a habit which still 
prevails in Scotland ; " and then he remarks, with 
censorious emphasis, on the "drunken manners of 
his countrymen." This was about 1770. 

In my part of the country the traditionary stories 
of drinking prowess are quite marvellous. On 
Deeside there flourished a certain Saunders Paul 
(whom I remember an old man), an innkeeper at 
Banchory. He was said to have drank whisky, 
glass for glass, to the claret of Mr. Maule and the 
Laird of Skene for a whole evening ; and m those 
days there was a traditional story of his despatching, 
at one sitting, in company with a character celebrated 
for conviviality — one of the men employed to float 
rafts of timber down the Dee — three dozen of 
porter. Of this Mr. Paul it was recorded, that on 
being asked if he considered porter as a wholesome 
beverage, he replied, " Oh yes, \i you don't take 
above a dozen." Saunders Paul was, as 1 have 
said, the innkeeper at Banchory ; his friend and porter 
companion was drowned in the Dee, and when told 
that the body had been found down the stream below 
Crathes, he coolly remarked, " I am surprised at 



^6 Reminiscences of 

that, for I never kenn*d him pass the Inn before 
without comin' in for a glass." 

There was a sort of infatuation in the supposed 
dignity and manliness attached to powers of deep 
potation, and the fatal effects of drinkmg were 
spoken of in a manner both reckless and unfeeling. 
Thus, I have been assured that a well-known old 
laird of the old school expressed himself with great 
indignation at the charge brought against hard drink- 
ing that it had actually killed people. '' Na, na, I 
never knew onybody killed wi' drinking, but I hae 
kend some that deed in the training." A positive 
eclat was attached to the accomplished and well- 
trained consumer of claret or of v/hisky toddy, which 
gave an importance and even merit to the practice 
of drinking, and which had a most injurious effect. 
J am afraid some of the Pleydels of the old school 
would have looked with the most ineffible contempt 
on the degeneracy of the present generation in this 
respect, and that the temperance movement would be 
little short of insanity in their eyes ; and this leads 
me to a remark. In considering this portion of our 
subject, we should bear in mind a distinction. The 
change we now speak of involves more than a mere 
change of a custom or practice in social life, it is 
a chancre in men's sentiments and feelings on a cer- 
tain great question of morals. Except we enter into 
this distinction we cannot appreciate the extent of 
the change which has really taken place in regard to 
intemperate habits. 



Scottish Life c^' Lharacter. ai 

I have an anecdote from a descendant of Prin- 
cipal Robertson, of an address made to him, which 
shewed the real importance attached to all that 
concerned the system of drinking in his time. The 
Principal had been invited to spend some days in a 
country house, and the minister of the parish (a 
jovial character) had been asked to meet him. Be- 
fore dinner he went up to Dr. Robertson and ad- 
dressed him confidentially, " Doctor, 1 understand 
ye are a brother of my gude freend Peter Robertson 
of Edinburgh, therefore I'll gie ye a piece of advice, 
— Bend ^ weel to the Madeira at dinner, for here 
ye'll get little o't after." I have known persons 
who held that a man who could not drink must 
have a degree of feebleness and imbecility of char- 
acter. But as this is an important point, I will 
adduce the higher authority of Lord Cockburn, and 
quote from hmi two examples, very different cer- 
tainly in their nature, but both bearing upon the 
question. 1 refer to what he says of Lord Her- 
mand — ^' With Hermand drinking was a virtue; 
he had a sincere respect for drinking, indeed a high 
moral approbation, and a serious compassion for the 
poor wretches who could not indulge in it, and with 
due contempt of those who could but did not ; " 
and, secondly, I refer to Lord Cockburn's pages for 
an anecdote which illustrates the perverted feehng I 
refer to, now happily no longer existing. It relates 
the opinion expressed by an old drunken w^riter of 

1 Old Scotch for drink hard. 



48 Renvniscences of 

Selkirk (whose name is not mentioned) regarding his 
anticipation of professional success for Mr. Cran- 
stoLin, afterwards Lord Corehouse. Sir Walter 
Scott, William Erskine, and Cranstoun had dined 
with this Selkirk writer, and Scott, of hardy, strong, 
and healthy frame, had matched the writer himself 
in the matter of whisky punch. Poor Cranstoun, 
of refined anJ delicate mental and bodily tenipera- 
ment, was a bad hand at such work, and was soon 
off the field. On the party breaking up, the Sel- 
kirk writer expressed his admiration of Scott, as- 
suring him that he would rise high in the pro- 
fession, and adding : '^ I'll tell ye what, Maister 
Walter, that lad Cranstoun may get to the tap o' 
the b.ir, if he can \ but tak my word for't, it's no be 
by drinking." 

A legal friend has told me of a celebrated cir- 
cuit where Lord Herman J was judge, and Clephane 
depute-advocate. The party got drunk at Ayr, and 
so continued (although quite able for their work) till 
the business was concluded at Jedburgh. Some 
years after, my informant heard that this circuit had, 
at Jedburgh, acquired the permanent name of the 
*' daft circuit." 

Lo'rJ Cockburn was fond of describing a circuit 
scene at Stirling, in his early days at the bar, under 
the presidency of his friend and connection Lord 
Hermand. After the circuit dinner, and when 
di inking had gone on for some time, young Cock- 
burn observed places becoming vacant in the social 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 40 

circle, but no one going out at the door. He found 
that the individuals had dropt down under the table. 
He took the hint, and by this ruse retired from the 
scene. He lay quiet till the beams of the morning 
sun penetrated the apartment. The judge and some 
of his stanch friends coolly walked up-stairs, washed 
their hands and faces, came down to breakfcist, and 
went into court quite fresh and fit for work. 

The feeling of importance frequently attached 
to powers of drinking, was formally attested by a 
well-known western baronet of convivial habits and 
convivial memory. He was desirous of bearing 
testimony to the probity, honour, and other high 
moral qualities of a friend whom he wished to com- 
mend. Having fully stated these claims to con- 
sideration and respect, he deemed it proper to notice 
also his t-5«i;/z;/^/ attainments ; he added accordini^ly, 

with cautious approval on so important a point, 

" and he is a fair drinker." ^ 

The following anecdote is an amusing sample 
of Scottish servant humour and acutcness m measur- 
ing the extent of consumption by a convivial party 
in Forfarshire. The party had met at a farmer's 
house not far from Arbroath to celebrate the recon- 

1 A friend learned in Scottish history suggests an ingenious 
remark, that this might mean more than a mere full drinker. 
To drink " fair," used to imply that the person drank in the 
same proportion as the company; to drink more would be 
unmannerly ; to drink less might imply some unfair motive. 
Either interpretation sliews the importance attached to drinking 
and all that concerned it. 



50 Reminiscences of 

ciliation of two neighbouring farmers who had long 
been at enmity. The host was pressing and hospi- 
table ; the party sat late, and consumed a glorious 
quantity of whisky toddy. The wife was penurious ; 
and grudged the outlay. When at last, at a morn- 
ing hour, the party dispersed, the lady, who had not 
slept in her anxiety, looked over the stairs and 
eagerly asked the servant girl, " How many bottles 
of whisky have they used, Betty." The lass, who 
had not to pay for the whisky, but had been obliged 
to go to the well to fetch the water for the toddy, 
coolly answered, " I dinna ken, mem, but they've 
drunken sax gang o' watter." 

We cannot imagine a better illustration of the 
general habits that prevailed in Scottish society in 
regard to drinking about the time we speak of than 
one which occurs in the recently published " Memoirs 
of a Banking House," that of the late Sir William 
Forbes, Bart., of Pitsligo. The book comprises 
much that is interesting to the family, and to Scotch- 
men. It contains a pregnant hint as to the manners 
of polite society and business habits in those days. 
Of John Coutts, one of four brothers connected 
with the house, Sir William records how he was 
" more correct in his conduct than the others ; so 
much so, that Sir William never hut once saw him in 
the counting house disguised with liquor, and inca- 
pable of transacting business." 

I am indebted to the kindness of A4r. W. Cham- 
bers for the following graphic illustration of the 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 51 

scenes which the drunken habits of the time must 
often have exhibited in social Hfe : — In these bygone 
days, Peeblesshire had its due proportion of "drunken 
lairds," who, besides over-indulging in their own and 
their neighbours' houses, very frequently spent a night 
weekly in the chief inn in the county town on the 
occasion of attending market. Their return home 
on horseback, in the dull gray mornings after these 
coarse convivialities in Peebles, required considerable 
tact, as the roads were far from being good, and, in 
some places, went along unguarded precipitous banks 
overhanging the Tweed. There was a particularly 
bad bit of road between Peebles and Innerleithen. 
Here the river makes a sudden turn at the foot of a 
steep bank, and forms a deep, dark pool called " the 
dirt-pot." Now, it happened that a certain old laird 
had to pass this trying spot on his way home when 
more than half tipsy ; and it seems that, on one oc- 
casion, he had been mortally affronted by some one 
alleging, by way of joke, " that he was afraid to pass 
the dirt-pot." This affront stuck to the laird. While 
sober the recollection of it appeared to be in abey- 
ance, bat it always came back with full force when 
he reached a point of inebriety, and that was every 
night. Reaching this unhappy crisis, he broke out 
in an intolerably quarrelsome humour, muttering in- 
vectives on the subject which oppressed his mind — 
" Who says I am afraid to pass the dirt-pot? I say, 
shew me the man that tells me I am afraid to pass 
the dirt-pot ; " — and so on he would have gone till he 



^2 Reminiscences of 

became perfectly outrageous. But there was an un- 
derstanding in the house about what was to be done 
on these occasions. No sooner had the ominous 
words " dirt-pot " escaped the laird's lips, than the 
lady, his wife, quietly touched the bell. A servant 
entered the room, and, slipping behind the laird, 
seized hold of him in her arms, and dragged him 
oiT to bed — the poor laird being heard all the way 
mumbling disjointed imprecations against all who 
dared to say he was afraid to pass the dirt-pot. 

Strangely enough — indeed, most strange of all — 
the lady who had this unpleasant duty to perform, 
actually took pains to cultivate habits of drinking 
in her sons. An accomplished and worthy gentle- 
woman, she had, nevertheless, the common notion 
that drinking was part of the necessary business of 
life, and that all young men should be accustomed 
to carry liquor discreetly. Accordingly, she daily 
put before the young laird a certain quantity of wine 
which he was obliged to drink, whether he liked it 
or not. This reminds us of similar practices half a 
century ago in Ireland, when fathers used to tell 
their sons " to make their head while they were 
young I " 

In the Highlands this sort of feeling extended to 
an almost incredible extent, even so much as to ob- 
scure the moral and religious sentiments. Of this a 
striking proof was afforded in a circumstance which 
took place in my own church soon after I came into 
it. One of our Gaelic clergy had so far forgotten 



Scottish Life <^ Character. 53 

himself as to appear in the church somewhat the 
worse of liquor. This having happened so often as 
to come to the ears of the Bishop, he suspended him 
from the performance of divine service. Against 
this decision the people were a little disposed to re- 
bel, because, according to their Highland notions, 
" a gentleman was no the waur for being able to 
talc a gude glass o' whisky." These were the 
notions of a people in whose eyes the power ot 
swallowing whisky conferred distinction, and with 
whom inability to take the ^fitting quantity was a 
mark of a mean and futile character. Sad to tell, 
the funeral rites of Highland chieftains were not 
supposed to have been duly celebrated except there 
was an immoderate and often fatal consumption of 
whisky. It has been related that at the last funeral 
in the Highlands, conducted according to the tradi- 
tions of the olden times, several of the guests fell 
victims to the usage, and actually died of the ex- 
cesses. 

Scenes of a most incongruous and extraordinary 
nature are still traditionally connected with such 
occasions. Within the last thirty years, a laird of 
Dundonald, a 'small estate in Ross-shire, died at 
Inverness. There was open house, therefore, for a 
few days, and great eating and drinking Here the 
corpse commenced its progress towards its appointed 
home on the coast, and people followed in multitudes 
to give it a partial convoy, all of whom had to be 
entertained. It took altogether a fortnight to bury 



j;4 Reminiscences of 

poor Dundonald, and the expense must have been 
heavy. This, how^ever, is looked back to at Inver- 
ness as the last of the real grand old Highland funer- 
als. Such notions of what is due to the memory of 
the departed have now become unusual if not obso- 
lete. I myself v/itnessed the first great change in this 
matter. I officiated at the funeral of the late Duke 
of Sutherland. Vho. procession was a mile long. 
Refreshments were provided for 7000 persons : beef, 
bread, and beer, but not one glass of whisky was 
allowed on the property that day ! It may, perhaps, 
be said that the change we speak of is not pecu- 
liar to Scotland ; that in England the same change 
has been apparent, and that drunkenness has passed 
away in the higher circles, as a matter of course, as 
refinement and taste made an advancement in soci- 
ety. This is true. But there were some features of 
the question which were peculiar to Scotland, and 
which at one time rendered it less probable that in- 
temperance would give way in the north. It seemed 
in some quarters to have taken deeper root amongst 
us. The system of pressing, both in eating and 
drinking, seemed more inveterate. Nothing can more 
powerfully illustrate the deep-rooted character of in- 
temperate habits in families than an anecdote which 
was related to me, as coming from the late Mr. Mac- 
kenzie, author of the " Man of Feeling." He had 
been involved in a regular drinking party. He was 
keeping as free from the usual excesses as he was 
able, and as he marked companions around him fall- 



Scottish Life ^ Ckaracter. ^^ 

ing victims to the power of drink, he himself dropped 
off under the table among the slain, as a measure 
of precaution, and lying there, his attention was 
called to a small pair of hands working at his throat ; 
on asking what it was, a voice replied, " Sir, I'm the 
lad that's to lowse the neckcloths." Here, then, 
was a family, where, on drinking occasions, it was the 
appointed duty of one of the household to attend, and, 
when the guests were becoming helpless, to untie 
their cravats in fear of apoplexy or suffocation. We 
ought certainly to be grateful for the change which 
has taken place from such a system j for this change 
has. made a great revolution in Scottish social life. 
The charm and the romance long attached in the 
minds of some of our countrymen to the whole 
system and concerns of hard drinking was indeed 
most lamentable and absurd. At tavern suppers, 
where, nine times out of ten, it was the express object 
of those who went to get drunk, such stuiFas " regal 
purple stream," " rosy wine," " quaffing the goblet," 
" bright sparkling nectar," " chasing the rosy hours," 
and so on, tended to keep up the delusion, and make it 
a monstrous fine thing for men to sit up drinking half 
the night, to have frightful headaches all next day, 
to make maudlin idiots of themselves as they went 
home, and to become brutes amongst their family 
when they got home. And here 1 may introduce 
the mention of a practice connected with the con- 
vivial habits of which we have been speaking ; but 
which has for sometime passed away, at least from 



^6 Reminiscences of 

private tables, — I mean the absurd system of calling 
for toasts and sentiments each time the glasses were 
filled. During dinner not a drop could be touched, 
except in conjunction with others, and with each 
drinking to the health of each. But toasts came 
after dinner. I can just remember the practice in 
partial operation, and my astonishment as a mere 
boy, when accidentally dining at table and hearing my 
mother called upon to " give the company a gentle- 
man," is one of m.y very earliest reminiscences. 
Lord Cockburn must have remembered them well, 
and I will quote his most amusing account of the 
effects: — "After dinner, and before the ladies re- 
tired, there generally began what was called '•Rounds ' 
of toasts, when each gentleman named an absent 
lady, and each lady an absent gentleman, separately ; 
or one person was required to give an absent lady, 
and another person was required to match a gentle- 
man with that lady, and the persons named were 
toasted, generally, with allusions and jokes about the 
fitness of the union. And worst of all, there were 
* Sentiments.' These were short epigrammatic sen- 
tences expressive of moral feelings and virtues, and 
were thought refined and elegant productions. A 
faint conception of their nauseousness may be formed 
from the following examples, every one of which 
I have heard given a thousani times, and which 
indeed I only recollect from their being favourites. 
The glasses being filled, a person was asked for his 
or for her sentiment, when this, or something simi- 



Scottish Life ^ Character, 57 

lar, was committed, ' may the pleasures of the even- 
ing bear the reflections of the morning;' or, 'may 
the friends of our youth be the companions of our 
old age ; * or, ' delicate pleasures to susceptible 
minds,' ' may the honest heart never feel distress ;' 
' may the hand of charity u'ipe the tear from the 
eye of sorrovi^.' The conceited, the ready, or the 
reckless, hackneyed in the art, had a knack of mak- 
ing new sentiments applicable to the passing inci- 
dents with great ease. But it was a dreadful 
oppression on the timid or the awkward. They 
used to shudder, ladies particularly ; for nobody 
was spared when their turn in the round ap- 
proached. Many a struggle and blush did it cost ; 
but this seemed only to excite the tyranny of the 
masters of the craft ; and compliance could never be 
avoided, except by more torture than yielding. . . . 
It is difficult for those who have been born under 
a more natural system to comprehend how a sensible 
man, a respectable matron, a worthy old maid, and 
especially a girl, could be expected to go into com- 
pany easily, on such conditions." ^ 

This accompaniment of domestic drinking, I 
mean accompanying each glass by a toast or senti- 
ment — the practice of which is now confined to 
public entertainments — was then invariable in pri- 
vate parties, and was supposed to enliven and pro- 
mote the good fellowship of the social circle. Thus 

^ Lord Cockburn's McrDC^^ls of his Time, p. 37, et seq. 



58 



Reminiscences of 



Ferguson in one of his poems, in describing a dinner, 
says : — 

*' The grace is said ; it's nae ovver lang. 
The claret reams in bells. 
Quo' Deacon, ' Let the toast round gang ; 
Come, here's our noble sels 
Weel met the day.' " 

There was a great variety of these toasts, some 
of them exclusively Scottish. A correspondent has 
favoured me with a i^t^N reminiscences of such in- 
centives to inebriety. 

The ordinary form of drinking a health was in 
the address, " Here's t' ee." 

Then such as the following were named by suc- 
cessive members of the company at the call of the 
host : — 

'The land o' cakes (Scotland). 

Mair freens and less need o' them. 

Thumping luck and fat 'weans. 

When ioe''re gaun up the hill o' fortune may ive ne^ei 

meet a frien'' comin doun. 
May ne'er ivaur be amang us. 
May the hinges o' friendship ne'ver rust., or the luings o* 

Iwve lose a feather. 
Here''s to them that Wes us., or lends us a lift. 
Here''s health to the sick, stilts to the lame^ claise to the 

back., and brose to the njoame. 
Here^s health, ^wealth, ivit, and meal. % 

The deil rock them in a creel that does na"" ivisb us a' iveel. 
Horny hands and njoeather beaten haffets (cheeks). 
The rending o' rocks and the pu''in doun o' auld houses. 



Scottish Life (^ Character. 59 

The above two belong to the mason craft ; the 
first implies a wish for plenty of work, and health 
to do it ; the second, to erect new buildings and 
clear away old ones, v 

May the ijoinds o' ad'i'ersity ne'er blauj open our door. 
May poort'ith ne''er throiv us in the dirt^ or goixid into the 

high saddle A 
May the mouse ne'er lea've our meal pock ooi' the tear in 

its ee. 
Blythe may 'voe a' be.^ 
Ill may ive neuer see. 
Breeks and brochan (brose). 

May Tjue ne'' er -want a freend or a drappie to gie him. 
Gude een to ye a\ an'' tak your nappy, 
A nMilly-'voaught'' s a gude night cappy."^ 
May ive a' be canty and cozy. 
An"" ilk hae "a nvife in his bozy. 
A cozy but, and a canty ben. 
To couthie^ njoomen and trusty men. 
The ingle neuk nvi'' routh 4 o' bannocks and bairns. 
Here''s to him ivha nvinna beguile ye. 
Mair sense and mair siller, 
Horn, corn, ivool, an"" yarn.^ 

The system of giving toasts was so regularly 
established, that collections of them were published 
to add brilliancy to the festive board. By the kind- 
ness of the librarian, I have seen a little volume 
which is in the Writers' Library of Edinburgh, It 

1 May we never be cast down by adversity, or unduly 
elevated by prosperity. 

2 A toast at parting or breaking up of the party. 

3 Loving. 4 Plenty. ^ 1 oasts lor agricultural dinners 



6o Reminiscences of 

is entitled " The Gentleman's New Bottle Com 
panion," Edinburgh, printed in the year MDCCLXXvii. 
It contains various toasts and sentiments which the 
writer considered to be suitable to such occasions. 
Of the taste and decency of the companies where 
some of them could be made use of, the less is said 
the better. 

1 have heard also of large traditionary collections 
of toasts and sentiments belono-jny; to old clubs and 
societies extending back above a century, but I have 
not seen any of them, and I believe my readers will 
think they have had quite enough. A correspondent, 
however, to whom I applied respecting these minute 
books, sends me the following curious information : — 

" I have had an opportunity of examining a series of 
Records of an Edinburgh Club, extending from the middle to 
the close of the last century, in which many social changes 
are exhibited year after year. Its rules were clearly laid down 
and rigorously enforced. Fines for non-attendance at the 
club meetings were in all cases rigidly exacted, and if any 
man left the supper-table before the *■ serious drinking' began, 
he was fined instanter in four magnums of claret. When 
whiaky or usquebaugh was first used as a social drink I have 
no means of knowing. I do not know that the earlier Scot- 
tish poets allude to it at all, and I think that Ferguson and 
Burns are the first to sing its praises. In these ' records' the 
first mention of ' a gile of whisko ' at the club supper is in 
the year 1767, and toddy is not included in their bills of fare 
until a year later, and then only in small quantities (except, 
indeed, in one instance, when the club is charged for forty- 
two bottles of ' todie ' at one sitting !) French wines are the 
favourite drinks. 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 



61 



*' A Solan goose figures occasionally at their suppers, and 
is charged \os. Some of the members prefer ' speldings ' to 
anchovies, and there are very suggestive items in each bill for 
broken glasses and china, as well as for ' chairs and cadies ' 
(sedans and their bearers), for the use of those members who 
found it inconvenient to walk home. One of these jovial 
club supper bills (sometimes they are of alarming magnitude), 
now lies before me, stained by the wine spilled by unsteady 
hands a century ago, and its margins scrawled over, with the 
somewhat eccentric calculations as to the liability of each 
member, by the chairman of the evening, who no doubt had 
presided with his usual distinguished ability, ' and kept the 
company long together in the most exalted degree of har- 
mony and good humour,' as it is entered in the minutes of the 
evening. It may interest some readers to see a true copy of a 
last century tavern supper bill for a club of sixteen and a few 
guests. It is worth remarking that each pint stoup of claiet 
contained as much as /tco quart bottles ! ! " 



1783, 




7 


'0 John 


Fortune. 




June 4 


Supper, Jellies, and Sillubobs 


. . £^ 


10 


<» 




25 Pints Claret, at 10s 






12 


ID 


i» 




4 Botls. Sherry, at 3^. 






ti 


15 


»? 




7 Do. Port, at 2s. 6d. 






• 1? 


n 


6 




Port Negus . 






,, 


18 


,, 




Porter 






,, 


5 


6 




Punch and Todie 






,, 


12 


„ 




Bread and beer 






,, 


7 


6 




Biscuits, &c. 






,, 


4 


6 




Prawns 






11 


4 


,, 




Grangers, reasons, and 


almons 




„ 


14 


„ 




Chairs and Cadies 


, 




,, 


12 


6 




Drink to the Officer and Cadies 




„ 


7 


6 




Breakages 


. 




,. 


4 


6 




Wax Lights 








2 


'1 



24 4 



62 Rejniniscences of 

The favourable reaction which has taken place in 
regard to the whole system of intemperance may 
very fairly, in the first place, be referred to an im 
proved moral feeling. But other causes have also 
assisted \ and it is curious to observe how the differ- 
ent changes in the modes of society bear upon one 
another. The alteration in the convivial ' habits 
which we are noticing in our own country may be 
partly due to alteration of hours. The old plan 
of early dining favoured a system of suppers, and 
after supper was a great time for convivial songs 
and sentiments. This of course induced drinking 
to a late hour. Most drinking songs imply the 
night as the season of conviviality — thus in a pop- 
ular madrigal : — 

*' By the gaily circling glass, 
We can tell how minutes pass, 
By the hollow cask we 're told, 
How the waning night grows old." 

And Burns thus marks the time : — 

" It is the moon, I ken her horn. 
That 's blinkin' in the lift sae hie ; 
She shines sae bright, to wyle us hame. 
But by my sooth she '11 wait a wee." 

The young people of the present day have no 
idea of the state of matters in regard to the supper 
system when it was the normal condition of societv. 
7'he late dining hours may make the social circle 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 63 

more formal, but they have been far less favourable 
to drinking propensities. After such dinners as ours 
are now, suppers are clearly out of the question. 
One is astonished to look back and recal the scenes 
to which were attached associations of hilarity, con- 
viviality, and enjoyment. Drinking parties were 
protracted beyond the whole Sunday, having begun 
by a dinner on Saturday ; imbecility and prostrate 
helplessness were a common result of these bright 
and jovial scenes ; and by what perversion of lan- 
guage, or by what obliquity of sentiment, the notions 
of pleasure could be -attached to scenes of such ex- 
cess — to the nausea, the disgust of sated appetite, 
and the racking headache — it is not easy to explain. 
There were men of heads so hard, and of stomachs 
so insensible, that, like my friend Saunders Paul, 
they could stand anything in the way of drink. 
But to men in general, and to the more delicate 
constitutions, such a life must have been a cause 
of great misery. To a certain extent, and up to 
a certain point, wine may be a refreshment and a 
wholesome stimulant ; nay, it is a medicine, and 
a valuable one, and as such, comes recommended 
on fitting occasions by the physician. Beyond this 
point, as sanctioned and approved by nature, the 
use of wine is only degradation. Well did the 
sacred writer call wine, when thus taken in excess, 
''a mocker." It makes all men equal, because it 
makes them all idiotic. It allures them into a 
vicious indulgence, and then mocks their folly, by 



64 Re7?i/nisccnces, etc. 

depriving them of any sense they may ever have 
possessed. 

It does not appear that at this time a similir ex- 
cess in eating accompanied this prevalent tendency 
to excess in drinking. Scottish tables were at that 
period plain and abundant, but epicurism or gluttony 
do not seem to have been handmaids to drunkenness. 
A humorous anecdote, however, of a full-eating 
laird, may well accompany those which appertain 
to the drinking lairds. — A lady in the north having 
watched the proceedings of a guest, who ate long 
and largely, she ordered the servant to take away, 
as he had at last laid down his knife and fork. 
To her surprise, however, he resumed his work, 
and she apologised to him, saying, " I thought, 

Mr. , you had done." " Oh, so I had, 

mem ; but 1 just fan' a doo in the redd o' my 
plate." He had discovered a pigeon lurking 
amongst the bones and refuse of his plate, and 
could not resist finishing it. 




CHAPTER III. 
On the Old Scottish Domestic Servant, 

|E come now to a subject on which a 
great change has taken place in this 
country during my own experience. I 
allude to the third division which we 
proposed of these desultory remarks, viz., those 
peculiarities of intercourse which some years back 
marked the connection between masters and ser- 
vants. In many Scottish houses a great familiarity 
prevailed between members of the family and the 
domestics. For this many reasons might have been 
assigned. Indeed, when we consider the simple 
modes of life which discarded the ideas of cere- 
mony or etiquette, the retired and uniform style 
of living which afforded (qw opportunities for break 
or change in the domestic arrangements, and when 
we add to these a free, unrestrained, unformal, 
and natural style of intercommunion, which seems 
rather a national characteristic, we need not be sur- 
prised to find in quiet Scottish families a sort of 
* 5 



66 Reminiscences of 

intercourse with old domestics which can hardly be 
looked for now, when habits are changing so fast, 
and where much of the quiet eccentricity belonging 
to us as a national characteristic, is almost neces- 
sarily softened down or driven out. Many circum- 
stances thus conspired to promote familiarity with 
old domestics which are now entirely changed. We 
take the case of a middle-aged servant, or a young ser- 
vant passing year after year in a family. The servant 
grows up into old age and confirmed habits when the 
laird is becoming a man, a husband, father of a fam- 
ily. The domestic cannot forget the days when his 
master was a child, riding on his back, applying to 
him for help in difficulties about his fishing, his rab- 
bits, his pony, his going to school. All the family 
know how attached he is ; nobody likes to speak 
cross to him. He is a privileged man. The faith- 
ful old servant of thirty, forty, or fifty years, if with 
a tendency to be jealous, cross, and interfering, be- 
comes a great nuisance. Still the relative position 
was the result of good feelings. If the familiarity 
sometimes became a nuisance, it was a wholesome 
nuisance, and relic of a simpler time gone by. But 
the case of the old servant, whether agreeable or 
troublesome, was often so fixed and established in 
the households of past days, that there was scarce a 
possibility of getting away from it. The well-known 
story of the answer of one of these domestic tyrants 
to the irritated master, who was making an effort to 
free himself from the thraldoji, shews the idea en- 



Scottish Life (^ Character, 67 

tertained by one of the parties, at least, of the per- 
manency of the tenure. I am assured by a friend 
that the true edition of the story was this — An old 
Mr. Erskine of Dun had one of these old retainers, 
under whose language and unreasonable assumption 
he had long groaned. He had almost determined to 
bear it no longer, when, walking out with his man, on 
crossing a field, the master exclaimed, " There's a 
hare." Andrew looked at the place, and coolly re- 
plied, " What a big lee, it's a caufF.'' The master, 
quite angry now, plainly told the old domestic that 
they must part. But the tried servant of forty years, 
not dreaming of the possibility of his dismissal, inno- 
cently asked, " Ay, sir; whare ye gaun ? I'm sure 
yt'vQ. aye best at hame;" supposing that, if there 
were to be any disruption, it must be the master who 
would change the place. An example of a similar 
fixedness of tenure in an old servant was afforded in 
an anecdote related of an old coachman long in the 
service of a noble lady, and who gave all the trouble 
and annoyance which he conceived were the privi- 
leges of his position in the family. At last the lady 
fairly gave him notice to quit, and told him he must 
go. The only satisfaction she got was the quiet 
answer, " Na, na, my lady ; I druve ye to your mar- 
riage, and I shall stay to drive ye to your burial." 
It is but fair, however, to give an anecdote in which 
the master and the servant's position was reversed^ in 
reoard to the wish for change : — An old servant of 
a relative of my own, with an ungovernable temper, 



68 Reminiscences of 

became at last so weary of his master's irascibility, 
that he declared he must leave, and gave as his rea- 
son the fits of anger which came on and produced 
such great annoyance that he could not stand it any 
longer. His master, unwilling to lose him, tried to 
coax him by reminding him that the anger was soon 
off. " Ay,'' replied the other very shrewdly, " but it's 
nae suner aff than it's on again." I remember well 
an old servant of the old school, who had been fifty 
years domesticated in a family. Indeed I well re- 
member the celebration of the half-century service 
completed. There were rich scenes with Sandy and 
his mistress. Let me recall you both to memory. 
Let me think of you, the kind, generous, warm- 
hearted mistress. A gentlewoman by descent and 
by feeling. A true friend, a sincere Christian ; and 
let me think, too, of you, Sandy, an honest, faithful, 
and attached member of the family. For you were 
in that house rather as an humble friend than a ser- 
vant. But out of this fifty years of attached service 
there sprung a sort of domestic relation and freedom 
of intercourse which would surprise people in these 
days. And yet Sandy knew his place. Like Cor- 
poral Trim, who, although so familiar and admitted 
to so much familiarity with my Uncle Toby, never 
failed in the respectful address — never forgot to 
say "your honour." At a dinner party Sandy was 
very active about changing his mistress's plate, and 
whipped it off when he saw that she had got a piece 
of rich pattee upon it. His mistress not liking such 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 69 

rapid movements, and at the same time knowing 
that remonstrance was in vain, exclaimed, " Hout, 
Sandy, I'm no dune," and dabbed her fork into the 
pattee as it disappeared, to rescue a morsel. I re- 
member her praise of English mutton was a great 
annoyance to the Scottish prejudices of Sandy. One 
day she was telling me of a triumph Sandy had upon 
that subject. The smell of the joint roasting had 
become very, offensive, through the house. The lady 
called out to Sajidy to have the doors closed, and 
adding, " that must be some horrid Scotch mutton 
you have got." To Sandy's delight, this was a leg 
of English mutton his mistress had expressly chosen, 
and, as she significantly told me, '' Sandy never let 
that down upon me." 

On Deeside there existed, in my recollection, be- 
sides the Saunders Paul 1 have alluded to, a number 
of extraordinary acute and humorous Scottish char- 
acters amongst the lower classes. The native gen- 
try enjoyed their humour, and hence arose a familiar- 
ity of intercourse which called forth many amusing 
scenes and quaint rejoinders. A celebrated char- 
acter of this description, bore the. sobriquet of 
" Boaty." He had acted as Charon of the Dee at 
Banchory, and passed the boat over the river before 
there was a bridge. Boaty had many curious sayings 
recorded of him. When speaking of the gentry 
around, he characterized them according to their oc- 
cupations and activity of habits — thus, " As to Mr. 
Russell of Blackha', he just works himsell like a 



yo Reminiscences of 

paid labourer; Mr. Duncan's a* the day fish, fish , 
but Sir Robert 's a perfect gentleman ; he does nae- 
thing, naethino;." Boaty was a first-rate salmon- 
fisher himself, and was much sought after by ama- 
teurs who came to Banchory for the sake of the 
sport afforded by the beautiful Dee. He was, per- 
haps, a little spoiled, and presumed upon the indul- 
gence and familiarity shL'.vn to him in the way of his 
craft, — as, for example, he was in attendance with 
his boat on a sportsman who was both slcilful and 
successful, for he caught salmon after salmon. Be- 
tween each fish catching he solaced himself with 
a good pull from a flask, which he returned to his 
pocket, however, without offering to let Boaty have 
any participation in the refreshment. Boaty, partly 
a little professionally jealous, perhaps, at the success, 
and partly indignant at receiving less than his usual 
attention on such occasions, and seeing no prospect 
of amendment, deliberately pulled the boat to shore, 
shouldered the oars, rods, landing-nets, and all the 
fishing apparatus which he had provided, and set off 
homewards. His companion, far from considering 
his day's work to be over, and keen for more sport, 
was amazed, and peremptorily ordered him to come 
back. But all the answer made by the offended 
Boaty was, " Na, na ; them 'at drink by themsells 
may just fish by themsells." 

The charge these old domestics used to take of the 
mterests of the family, and the cool way in which 
they took upon them to protect those interests, some- 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 71 

times led to very provoking, and sometimes to very 
ludicrous exhibitions of importance. A friend told 
me of a dinner scene illustrative of this sort of inter- 
ference which had happened at Airth in the last 
generation. Mrs. Murray of Abercairney had been 
amongst the guests, and at dinner one of the family 
noticed that she was looking for the proper spoon to 
help herself with salt. The old servant Thomas was 
appealed to, that the want might be supplied. He 
did not notice the appeal. It was repeated m a more 
peremptory manner, " Thomas, Mrs. Murray has 
not a salt spoon," to which he replied most emphati- 
cally, " Last time Mrs. Murray dined here, we lost 
a salt spoon.*' An old servant who took a similar 
charge of everything that went on in the family, hav- 
ing observed that his master thought he had drunk 
wine with every lady at table, but had overlooked 
one, jogged his memory with the question, " What 
ails ye at her wi' the green gown ? '* 

In my own family I know a case of a very long 
service, and where, no doubt, there was much interest 
and attachment, but it was a case where the temper 
had not softened under the influence of years, but 
had rather assumed that form of disposition which 
we denominate crusty. My grand-uncle, Sir A. Ram- 
say, died in 1806, and left a domestic who had been 
in his service since he was ten years of age ; and 
being at the time of his master's death past fifty or 
well on to sixty, he must have been more than forty 
years a servant in the familv. From the retired life 



72 Reminiscences of 

my grand-uncle had been leading, Jamie Laval had 
much of his own way, and, like many a domestic so 
F.ituated, he did not like to be contradicted, and, in 
fact, could not bear to be found fault with. My 
uncle, who had succeeded to a part of my grand-un- 
cle's property, succeeded also to Jamie Layal, and 
from respect to his late master's memory and Jamie's 
own services, he took him into his house, intending 
him to act as house servant. However, this did not 
answer, and he was soon kept on, more with the 
form than the reality of any active duty, and took 
any light work that was going on about the house. 
In this capacity it was his daily task to feed a flock 
of turkeys who were growing up to maturity. On 
one occasion, my aunt having followed him in his 
work, and having observed an enormous waste of 
food, and that the ground was actually covered with 
grain which they could not eat, and which would 
soon be destroyed and lost, naturally remonstrated, 
and suggested a more reasonable and provident sup- 
ply. But all the answer she gut from the offended 
Jamie was a bittsr rejoinder, " Weel, then, neist 
time they shall get nane ava ! " On another occa- 
sion a family from a distance had called whilst my 
uncle and aunt were out of the house. Jamie came 
into the parlour to deliver the cards, or to announce 
that they had called. A4y aunt, somewhat vexed at 
not having been in the wav, inquired what message 
Mr. and Mrs. Lines had left, as she had expected 
one. " No ! no message." She returned to the 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 73 

charge, and asked again if they had not told him 
anything he was to repeat. Still, " No ! no mes- 
sage." " But did they say nothing ? Are you sure 
they said nothing?*' Jamie, sadly put out and of- 
fended at being thus interrogated, at last burst forth, 
" They neither said ba nor bum," and indignantly 
left the room, banging the door after him. A char- 
acteristic anecdote of one of these old domestics I 
have from a friend who was acquainted with the par- 
ties concerned. 'I'he old man was standing at the 
sideboard and attending to the demands of a pretty 
large dinner party ; the calls made for various wants 
from the company became so numerous and frequent 
that the attendant got quite bewildered, and lost his 
patience and temper ; at length he gave vent to his 
indJLj-nation in a remonstrance addressed to the whole 

o 

company, *' Cry a' thegither, that's the way to be 
served." 

I have two characteristic and dry Scottish an- 
swers, traditional in the Lothian family, supplied to 
me by the present excellent and highly gifted young 
Marquis. A Marquis of Lothian of a former gen- 
eration, observed in his walk two workmen very busy 
with a ladder to reach a bell, on which they next 
kept up a furious ringing. He asked what was the 
object of making such a din •, to which the answer 
was, " Oh, juist, my lord, to ca' the workmen togeth 
er.'^ tc Why, how many are there ? " asked his lord- 
ship. '' Ou, just Sandy and me," was the quiet 
rejoinder. The same I^ord Lothian, looking about 



74 Reminiscences of 

the garden, directed his g.irdener's attention to a par- 
ticular plum-tree, charging him to be careful of the 
produce of that tree, and send the whole of it in 
marked, as it was of a very particular kind. " Ou,'* 
said the gardener, " I'll do that, my lord ; there's 
juist twa o' them." 

These dry answers of Newbattle servants remind 
us of a similar state of communication m a Yester 
domestic. Lord Tweeddale was very fond of dogs, 
and on leaving Yester for London, he instructed his 
head keeper, a quaint bodie, to give him a periodical 
report oF the kennel, and particulars of his favourite 
dogs. Among the latter was an especial one, of the 
true Skye breed, called " Pickle," from which so- 
briquet we may form a pretty good judge of his 
qualities. 

It happened one day, in or about the year 1827, 
that poor Pickle during the absence of his master 
was taken unwell ; and the watchful guardian im- 
mediately warned the marquis of the sad fact, (and 
of the progress of the disease,) which lasted three 
days — for which he sent the three following lacon- 
ic despatches — 

Tester^ May ist^ 18 — . 

My Lord, ^ 

Pickle's no weel. 

Your Lordship's humble servant, etc. 

Tester, zd May 1 8 — , 
My Lord, 

Pickle will no do ! 

I am your Lordship's, etc. 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 75 

Tester i ^d May 1 8 — . 
My Lord, 

Pickle's dead ! 

I am your Lordship's, etc. 

I have heard of an old Forfarshire lady who, 
knowing the habits of her old and spoilt servant, 
when she wished a note to be taken without loss of 
time, held it open and read it over to him, saying, 
"There, noo, Andrew, ye ken a* that's in't ; noo 
dinna stop to open it, but just send it afF." Of 
another servant when sorely tried by an unaccus- 
tomed bustle and hurry, a very amusing anecdote 
has been recorded. His mistress, a woman of high 
rank, who had been living in much quiet and retire- 
ment for some time, was called upon to entertain a 
large party at dinner. She consulted with Nichol, 
her faithful servant, and all the arrangements were 
made for the great event. As the company were 
arriving, the lady saw Nichol running about in great 
agitation, and in his shirt sleeves. She remonstrated, 
and said that as the guests were coming in he must 
put on his coat. " Indeed, my lady," was his ex- 
cited reply, " indeed, there's sae muckle rinning here 
and rinning there, that I'm juist distrackit. I hae 
cuist'n my coat and waistcoat, and faith 1 dinna ken 
how lang I can thole ^ my breeks." There is often a 
ready wit in this class of character, marked by their 
replies. I have the following communicated from an 
ear witness : " Weel, Peggy," said a man to an old 
family servant, " I wonder yer aye single yet ? " 

1 Bear. 



j6 Reminiscences of 

" Me marry," said she indignantly ; " I wadna gic 
my single life for a' the double anes I ever saw." 

An old woman was exhorting a servant once about 
her ways. " You serve the deevil," said she. 
"Me ' " said the girl ; " Na, na, I diima serve the 
deevil, I serve ae single lady." 

A baby was out with the nurse, who walked it up 
and down a garden. " Is't a laddie or a lassie ? " said 
the gardener. " A laddie," said the maid. " Weel," 
says he, " I'm glad o' that, for there's ower mony 
women in the world." " Hech, man," said Jess,'^div 
ye no ken there's aye maist sawn o' the best crap ? '* 

The answers of servants used curiously to illus- 
trate habits and manners of the time, — as the 
economical modes of her mistress' life were well 
touched by the lass who thus described her ways and 
domestic habits with her household : " She's vicious 
upo' the wark : but eh, she's vary mysterious o' the 
victualling." 

A country habit of making the gathering of the 
congregation in the churchyard previous to and after 
divine service an occasion for gossip and business, 
which 1 remember well, is thoroughly described in 
the following : — A lady, on hiring a servant-girl in 
the country, told her, as a great indulgence, that she 
should have the liberty of attending the church every 
Sunday, but that she would be expected to return 
home always immediately on the conclusion of ser- 
vice. The lady, however, rather unexpectedly found 
a positive objection raised against this apparently 



Scottish Life c|^ Character. 77 

reasonable arrangement. " Then I canna engadge 
wi' ye, mem ; for 'deed I wadna gle the crack, i' the 
kirkyard for a' the sermon." 

The changes that many of us have lived to wit- 
ness in this kind of intercourse betvvreen families and 
old servants is a part of a still greater change — the 
change in that modification of the feudal system, the 
attachment of clans. This, also, from transfers of 
property and extinction of old families in the High- 
lands, as u^ell as from more general causes, is passing 
away ; and it includes also changes in the intercourse 
between landed proprietors and cottagers, and aboli- 
tion of harvest homes, and such meetings. People are 
now more independent of each other, and service 
is become a pecuniary and not a sencimental ques- 
tion. The extreme contrast of that ola- fashioned 
Scottish intercourse of families with their servants 
and depeiidents, of which I have given some amus- 
ing examples, is found in the modern miinu factory 
system. There the service is a mere Question of 
personal interest. One of our first practical eiigi- 
neers, and one of the first engine-makers in Eng- 
land, told my brother that he employed and paid 
handsomely on an average 1200 workmen » but that 
they held so little feeling for him as their master, 
that not above half a dozen of the number would 
notice him when passing him, either in the works or 
out of work hours. Contrast this advanced .cf-Age 
of dependents' indifference with the familiantv «f 
domestic intercourse we have been describing' 




CHAPTER IV. 

On Humour proceeding from Scottish Lan- 
guage, INCLUDING Scottish Proverbs. 

JE come next to reminiscences chiefly con- 
nected with peculiarities which turned 
upon our Scottish Language, whether 
contained in words or in expressions. 
Now this is a very important change, and affects in 
a greater degree than many persons would imagine, 
the general modes and aspects of society. I suppose 
at one time the two countries of England and Scot- 
land were considered as almost speaking different 
languages^ and I suppose also, that from the period 
of the union of the crowns, the language has been 
assimilating. We see the process of assimilation 
going on, and ere long amongst persons of education 
and birth very little difference will be perceptible. 
With regard to that class a great change has taken 
place in my time, I recollect old Scottish ladies 
and gentlemen who regularly spoke Scotch. It was 
not, mark me, speaking English with an accent. 
No ; it was downright Scotch. Every tone and 
every syllable was Scotch. For example, I recollect 



Scottish Life ^ Character. yg 

old Miss Erskine of Dun, a fine specimen of a real 
lady, and daughter of an ancient Scottish house. 
Many people now would not understand her. She 
was always the lady^ notwithstanding her dialect, and 
to none could the epithet vulgar be less appropriately 
applied. I speak of thirty years ago, and yet I recol- 
lect her accost to me as well as if it were yesterday, " I 
didna ken ye were i' the toun." Taking words and 
accent together, an address how totally unlike what 
we now meet with in society. Some of the old 
Scottish words which we can remember are de- 
licious ; but how strange they would sound to the 
ears of the present generation ! Fancy that in walk- 
ing from church, and discussing the sermon, a lady 
of rank should now express her opinion of it by the 
description of its being, " but a hummelcorn dis- 
course." Many living persons can remember Angus 
old ladies who would sav to their nieces and dau^h- 
ters, " Whatna hummeldoddie o' a mutch hae ye 
gotten ? " meaning a flat and low-crowned cap. In 
speaking of the dryness of the soil on a road in Lan- 
arkshire, a farmer said, "It stoors^ in an orr."^ 
How would this be as tersely translated into Eng- 
lish ? The late Duchess of Gordon sat at dinner 
next an English gentleman who was carving, and 
who made it a boast that he was thoroughly master 
of the Scottish language. Her Grace turned to him 

' Stoor is, Scottice, dust in motion^ and there is really no 
*ynonyme for it in English. 
8 Hour. 



8o Reminiscences of 

and said, " Rax me a spaul o' that bubbly jock."^ 
The unfortunate man was completely nonplussed, A 
Scottish gentleman was entertaining at his house an 
English cousin who professed himself as rather know- 
ing \{-\ the language of the north side of the Tweed. 
He asked him what he supposed to be the meaning 
of the expression, " ripin' the ribs." ^ To which 
he readily answered, " Oh, it describes a very fat 
man." I profess myself an out and out Scotchman. 
I have strong national partialities — call them if you 
will national prejudices. I cherish a great love of 
old Scottish language. Some of our pure Scottish 
ballad poetry is unsurpassed in any language for 
grace and pathos. How expressive, how beautiful 
are its phrases ! You can't translate them. Take 
an example of power in a Scotch expression, to de- 
scribe with tenderness and feeling what is in human 
life. Take one of our most familiar phrases ; as 
thus, — we meet an old friend, we talk over bygone 
days, and remember many who were dear to us both, 
once bright and young and gay, of whom some re- 
main, honoured, prosperous, and happy — of whom 
some are under a cloud of misfortune or disgrace — 
some are broken in health and spirits — some sunk 
into the grave; we recal old familiar places — old 
companions, pleasures, and pursuits ; as Scotchmen 
our hearts are touched with these remembrances of 
AuLD Lang Syne. 

1 Reach me a leg of that turkey. 

2 Clearing ashes out of the bars of the grate. 



Scottish Life c^ Character, 81 

Match me the phrase in English. You can't trans- 
late it. The fitness :>;id the beauty lie in the felicity 
of the language. Like many happy expressions, it 
is not transferable into another tongue, just like the 
" simplex munditiis " of Horace, which describes the 
natural grace of female elegance, or the uvTjpc^fiov 
yekaaiia of ^schylus, which describes the bright 
sparkling of the ocean m the sun. 

I think the power of Scottish dialect was happily 
exemplified by the late Dr. Adam, rector of the High 
School of Edinburgh, in his translation of the Hora- 
tiari expression, " desipere in loco," which he turned 
by the Scotch phrase " W eel-timed daffin'," a trans- 
lation, however, which no one but a Scotchman could 
appreciate. The following humorous Scottish trans- 
lation of an old Latin aphorism has been assigned to 
the late Dr. Hill of St. Andrews, " ^ui bene cepit di' 
7nidium facti fecit. "" The witty Principal expressed in 
Scotch, '' Weel saipet (well soaped) is half shaven." 

What mere English word could have expressed a 
distinction so well in such a case as the following ? I 
heard once a lady in Edinburgh objecting to a preach- 
er that she did not understand him. Another lady, 
his great admirer, insinuated that probably he v/as too 
" deep " for her to follow. But her ready ; r.swer 
was, " Na, na, he's no just deep, but he's dri dy^^ 

We have just received a testimony to the \'<;l::e of 
our Scottish language from the illustrious Cluuuellor 

I Mentally confused. Muddy when applied to water. 



82 Rcmi?2!scences of 

of the University of Edinburgh, the force and au-' 
thority of which no one will be disposed to question. 
Lord Brougham, in speaking of improvements upon 
the English language, makes these striking re- 
marks: — 

" The pure and classical language of Scotland must on no ac- 
count be regarded as a provincial dialect, any more than French 
was so regarded in the reign of Henry V., or Italian in that of 
the first Napoleon, or Greek under the Roman Empire. Nor 
is it to be in any manner of way considered as a corruption of 
the Saxon ; on the contrary, it contains much of the old and 
genuine Saxon, with an intermixture from the Northern nations, 
as Danes and Norse, and some, though a small portion, from 
the Celtic. But in whatever way composed, or from whatever 
sources arising, it is a national language, used by the whole peo- 
ple in their early years, by many learned and gifted persons 
throughout life, and in which are written the laws of the Scotch, 
their judicial proceedings, their ancient history, above all, their 
poetry. 

" There can be no doubt that the English language would 
greatly gain by being enriched with a number both of words 
and of phrases, or turns of expression, now peculiar to the 
Scotch. It was by such a process that the Greek became the 
first of tongues, as well written as spoken. . . 

'* Would it not afford means of enriching and improving the 
English language, if full and accurate glossaries of improved 
Scotch words and phrases — those successfully used by the best 
writers, both in prose and verse — were given, with distinct ex- 
planation and reference to authorities ? This has been done in 
France and other countries, where some dictionaries accompany 
the English, in some cases with Scotch synonymes, in others 
with varieties of expression." Installation Address, p. 6^. 

I cannot help thinking that a change of national 



Scottish Life <Sf Character, 83 

language involves to some extent change of national 
character. Numerous examples of great power in 
Scottish phraseology, to express the picturesque, the 
feeling, the vi^ise, and the humorous, might be taken 
from the works of Robert Burns, Ferguson, or Allan 
Ramsay, and v^hich lose their charm altogether when 
unscottifiecL The speaker certainly seems to take a 
strength and character from his words. We must 
now look for specimens of this racy and expressive 
tongue in the more retired parts of the country. It 
is no longer to be found in high places. It has dis- 
appeared from the social circles of our cities. In 
my early days the intercourse with the peasantry of 
Forfarshire, Kincardineshire, and especially of Dee- 
side, was most amusing, not that the things said were 
so much out of the common, as that the language in 
which they were conveyed was picturesque, and odd, 
and taking. And certainly it does appear to me that 
as the language grov/s more uniform and convention- 
al, less marked and peculiar in its dialect and expres- 
sions, so does the character of those who speak it 
become so. I have a rich sample of Mid-Lothian 
Scotch from a young friend in the country, who 
describes the conversation of an old woman on the 
property as amusing her by such specimens of genu- 
ine Scottish raciness and humour. On one occasion, 
for instance, the young lady had told her humble 
friend that she was going to Ireland, and would have 
to undergo a sea voyage. " Weel, noo, ye dinna 
mean that ! Ance I thocht to gang across to tither 



84 Reminiscences of 

side o' the Queensferry wi' some ither folks to a fair, 
ye ken \ but juist when e'er I pat my fit in the boat, 
the boat gie wallop, and my heart gie a loup, and 1 
thocht I'd gang oot o' my judgment athegither, 
so says I, Na, na, ye gang awa by yoursells to tither 
side, and I'll bide here till sik times as ye come awa 
back." When we hear our Scottish language at home, 
and spoken by our own countrymen, we are not so 
much struck with any remarkable effects ; but it takes 
a far more impressive character when heard amongst 
those who speak a different tongue, and when encoun- 
tered in other lands. I recollect the late Sir Robert 
Liston expressing this feeling in his own case. When 
our ambassador at Constantinople, some Scotchmen 
had been recommended to him for some purpose of 
private or of government business ; and Sir Robert 
was always ready to do a kind thing for a country- 
man. He found them out in a barber's shop waiting 
for being shaved in turn. One came in rather late, 
and seeing he had scarcely room at the end of the 
seat, addressed his countryman, " Neebour, wad ye 
sit a bit wast.'''' What strong associations must have 
been called up, by hearing, in a distant land, such an 
expression in Scottish tones. 

We may observe here, that marking the course 
any person is to take, or the direction in which any 
object is to be met with by the points of the compass, 
was a prevailing practice amongst the older Scottish 
race. There could hardly be a more ludicrous ap- 
plication of the test, than was furnished by an honest 



Scottish Life cj^ Character. 85 

Highlander in describing the direction which his medi- 
cine would not take. Jean Gumming, of Altyre, 
who, in common with her three sisters, was a true 
soeur de la charite, was one day taking her rounds as 
usual, visiting the poor sick, among whom there was 
a certain Donald MacQueen, who had been some- 
time confined to his bed. Jean Gumming, after 
asking him how he felt, and finding that he was " no 
better," of course inquired if he had taken the medi- 
cine which she had sent him ; " Troth no, me lady," 
he replied. " But why not, Donald," she answered, 
"it was very wrong ; how can you expect to get bet- 
ter if you do not help yourself with the remedies which 
Heaven provides for you." " Fright or Frang," said 
Donald, " it wou'd na gang wast in spite o' me." 
In all the north country, it is always said, " I'm 
ganging east or west," etc., and it happened that 
Donald on his sick bed was lying east and west, his 
feet pointing to the latter direction, hence his reply 
to indicate that he could not swallow the medicine ! 
We may fancy the amusement of the officers of a 
regiment in the West Indies at the innocent remark 
of a young lad who had just joined from Scotland. 
On meeting at dinner, his salutation to his colonel 
was, " Anither het day, Gornal," as if " het days" 
were in Barbadoes few and far between, as they were 
in his dear old stormy cloudy Scotland. Or take the 
case of a Scottish saying, which indicated at once the 
dialect and the economical habits of a hardy and 
struggling race. A young Scotchman, who had been 



86 Reminiscences of 

some time in London, met his friend recently come 
up from the north to pursue his fortune in the great 
metropolis. On discussing matters connected with 
their new life in London, the more experienced vis- 
itor remarked- upon the greater expenses there thaji 
in the retired Scottish town which they had left. 
" Ay," said the other, sighing over the reflection, 
"When ye get cheenge for a saxpence here, it's 
soon slippit awa'." I recollect a story of my father's 
which illustrates the force of dialect, although con- 
fined to the inflections of a single monosyllable. On 
riding home one evening, he passed a cottage or small 
farm-house, where there was a considerable assem- 
blage of people, and an evident incipient merry-making 
for some festive occasion. On asking; one of the 
lasses standing about what it was, she answered, 
"Ou, it's juist a wedding o' Jock Thamson and 
Janet Eraser." To the question, " Is the bride 
rich?" there was a plain quiet " Na." "Is she 
young ? " a more emphatic and decided " Naa ' " 
but to the query, " Is she bonny?" a most elaborate 
and prolonged shout of " Naaa ! " 

It has been said that the Scottish dialect is pecu- 
liarly powerful in its use of vowels^ and the following 
dialogue between a shopman and a customer has been 
given as a specimen. The conversation relates to a 
plaid hanging at the shop door — 

Cus. (inquiring the material), Oo ? (wool ?) 

Shop. Ay, oo (yes, of wool). 

Cus. A' oo ? (all wool ?) 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 87 

Shop. Ay, a* 00 (yes, all wool). 

Cus. A' ae 00 ? (all same wool ?) 

Shop. Ay, a' ae 00 (yes, all same wool). 

An amusing anecdote of a pithy and jocular reply, 
comprised in one syllable, is recorded of an eccentric 
legal Scottish functionary of the last century. An 
advocate, of whose legal qualifications he had formed 
rather a low estimate, was complaining to him of 
being passed over in a recent appointment to the 
bench, and expressed his sense of the injustice with 
which he had been treated. He was very indi2;nant 
at his claims and merit being overlooked in their not 
choosing him for the new judge, adding with much 
acrimony, " And I can tell you they might have got a 
'waur.'"^ To which, as if merely coming over the 
complainant's language again, the answer was a grave 
"Whaur?"^ The merit of the impertinence was, 
that it sounded as if it were merely a repetition of his 
friend's last words, waur and whaur. It was as if 
^*' echo answered whaur ?" As I have said, the oddity 
and acuteness of the speaker arose from the manner 
of expression, not from the thing said. In fact, the 
same thing said in plain English would be mere com- 
monplace. I recollect being much amused with a 
dialogue between my brother and his man, the chief 
manager of a farm which he had just taken, and, I 
suspect, in a good measure, manager of the farmer 
as well. At any rate he committed to this acute 
overseer all the practical details ; and on the present 

1 Worse. a WJiere. 



88 Reminiscences of 

occasion had sent him to market to dispose of a cow 
and a pony, a simple enough transaction, and with a 
simple enough result. The cow was brought back, 
the pony was sold. But the man's description of it 
forms the point. " Well, John, have you sold the 
cow ? " " Na, but I grippit a chiel for the powny ! " 
The ^^-grippit" was here most expressive ! Indeed, 
this word has a significance hardly expressed by any 
English one, and used to be very prevalent to indicate 
keen and forcible tenacity of possession j thus a char- 
acter noted for avarice or sharp looking to self interest, 
was termed "grippy." In mechanical contrivances, 
anything taking a close adherence, was called having 
a gude grip, I recollect in boyish days when on 
Deeside taking wasp nests, an old man looking on 
was sharply stung by one, and his description was, 
" Ane o' them's grippit me fine." The following 
had an indescribable piquancy, which arose from the 
Scotticism of the terms and the manners. Many years 
ago, when accompanying a shooting party on the 
Grampians, not with a gun like the rest, but with a 
botanical box for collecting specimens of mountain 
plants, the party had got very hut, and very tired, and 
very cross. On the way home, whilst sitting down 
to rest, a gamekeeper-sort of attendant, and a charac- 
ter in his way, said, " I wish I was in the dining-room 
of Fasque." An old laird very testily replied, *' Ye'd 
soon be kickit out o' that;" to which the other re- 
plied, not at all daunted, " Weel, weel, then I wadni* 
be far frae the kitchen." A quaint and characteristic 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 89 

reply, I recollect from another farm-servant. My 
eldest brother had just been constructing a piece of 
machinery, which was driven by a stream of water 
running through the home farm-yard. There was a 
thrashing machine, a winnowing machine, and cir- 
cular saw for splitting trees into paling, and other 
contrivances of a like kind. Observing an old man, 
who had long been about the place, looking very at- 
tentively at all that was going on, he said, " Wonder- 
ful things people can do now, Robby ?" " Ay," 
said Robby, " indeed, Sir Alexander, I'm thinking if 
Solomon was alive noo he'd be thocht naethino- o' ! " 
But, after all, it was amongst the old ladies that the 
great abundance of choice pungent Scottish expres- 
sions, such as you certainly do not meet with in these 
days, was to be sought. In their position of society, 
education either in England, or education conducted 
by English teachers, has so spread in Scottish families, 
and intercourse with the south has been so increased, 
that all these colloquial peculiarities are f^ist disappear- 
ing. Some of the ladies of this older school felt 
some indignation at the change which they lived to 
see was fast going on. One of them, being asked if 
an individual whom she had lately seen was "Scotch," 
answered with some bitterness, " I canna say ; ye a' 
speak sae genteel now that I dinna ken wha's Scotch." 
It was not uncommon to find, in young persons, ex- 
amples, some years ago, of an attachment to the 
Scottish dialect, like that of the old lady. \n the life 
of P. Tytler, lately published, there is an account of 



9^ Reminiscences of 

his first return to Scotland from a school in Enorland. 

o 

His family were delighted with his appearance, man- 
ners, and general improvement ; but a sister did not 
share this pleasure unmixed, for being found in tears, 
and the remark being made, "Is he not charming,'* 
her reply was, in great distress, " Oh yes, but he 
speaks English !" 

The class of old Scottish ladies marked by so many 
peculiarities, generally lived in provincial towns, and 
never dreamt of going from home. Many had never 
been in London, or had even crossed the Tweed. 
But as Lord Cockburn's experience goes back farther 
than mine, and as he had special opportunities of be- 
ing acquainted with their characteristic peculiarities, 
I will quote his animated description at page 57 of 
his memorials. "There was a singular race of old 
Scotch ladies. They were a delightful set — strong- 
headed, warm-hearted, and high-spirited — merry 
even in solitude ; very resolute ; indifferent about the 
modes and habits of the modern world, and adhering 
to their own ways, so as to stand out like primitive 
rocks above ordinary society. Their prominent qual- 
ities of sense, humour, affection, and spirit, were 
embodied in curious outsides, for they all dressed, and 
spoke, and did exactly as they chose. Their language, 
like their habits, entirely Scotch, but without any 
other vulgarity than what perfect naturalness is some- 
times mistaken for." ^ 

This is a masterly description of a race now ah 
1 Lord Cockburn's Memorials, p. 58. 



Scottish Life <^ Character. 91 

but passed away. I have known several of them 
in my early days ; and amongst them we must look 
for the racy Scottish peculiarities of diction and of 
expression which, with them, are also nearly gone. 
Lord Cockburn has given some illustrations of these 
peculiarities ; and I have heard others, especially 
connected with Jacobite partialities, of which I say 
nothing, as they are in fact rather strong for such an 
occasion as the present. One, however, I heard 
lately as coming from a Forfiirshire old lady of this 
class, which bears upon the point of " resolute " 
determination referred to in Lord Cockburn's de- 
scription. She had been very positive in the dis- 
claiming of some assertion which had been attributed 
to her, and on being asked if she had not written it, 
or something very like it, she replied, " Na, na ; I 
never write onything of consequence — I may deny 
what I say, but I canna deny what I write." 

Mrs. Baird of Newbyth, the mother of our dis- 
tinguished countryman the late General Sir David 
Baird, was always spoken of as a grand specimen of 
the class. When the news arrived from India of the 
gallant but unfortunate action of '84 against Hyder 
Ali, in which her son, then Captain Baird, was en- 
gaged, it was stated that he and other officers had 
been taken prisoners and chained together two and 
two. The friends were careful in breaking such sad 
intellicrence to the mother of Captain Baird. When, 
however, she was made fully to understand the posi- 
tion of her son and his gallant companions, disdain- 



92 Remiiiisi enccs of 

ing all weak and useless expressions of her ov/n 
grief, and knowing well the restless and athletic 
habits of her son, all she said was, " Lord pity the 
chiel that's chained to our Davy." ^ 

The ladies of this class had certainly no affecta- 
tion in speaking of those who came under their dis- 
pleasure, even when life and death were concerned. 
I had an anecdote illustrative of this characteristic, 
in a well-known old lady of the last century. Miss 
Johnstone of Westerhall. She had been extremely 
indignant that, on the death of her brother, his wid- 
ow had proposed to sell ofF the old furniture of Wes- 
terhall. She was attached to it from old associations, 
and considered the parting with it little short of sacri- 
lege. The event was, however, arrested by death, 
or, as she describes the result, " the furniture was a' 
to be roupit, and we couldna persuade her. But be- 
fore the sale cam on, in God's gude providence, she 
just clinkit afF herscll." Of this same iMiss John- 
stone, another characteristic anecdote has been pre- 
served in the family. She came into possession of 
Hawkhill, near Edinburgh, and died there. When 
dying, a tremendous storm of rain and thunder came 
on, so as to shake the house. In her own quaint 
eccentric spirit, and with no thought of profane or 
light allusions, she looked up, and, listening to the 

J It is but due to the memory of " our Davy " to state that 
" the chlel " to whom he was chained, in writing home to his 
friends, bore high testimony to the kindness and consideration 
with which he was treated by Captain Baird. 



Sioltish Lie cf' Character. 93 

storm, quietly remarked in reference to her departure, 
" Ech, sirs ! what a nicht for me to be fleeing thro' 
the air ! " Of fine acute sarcasm I recollect hearing 
an expression from rather a fnodern sample of the 
class, a charming character, but only to a certain 
degree answering to the description of the older gen- 
eration. Conversation turning, and with just indigna- 
tion, on the infidel remarks which had been heard from 
a certain individual, and on his irreverent treatment 
of Holy Scripture, all that this lady condescended to 
say of him was, " Gey impudent of him, I think." 

A recorded reply of old Lady Perth to a French 
gentleman is quaint and characteristic. They had 
been discussing the respective merits of the cookery 
of each country. The Frenchman offended the old 
Scottish peeress by some disparaging remarks on 
Scottish dishes, and by highly preferring those of 
France. All she would answer was, " Weel, weel, 
some fowk like parritch, and som^e like paddocks." ^ 
Of this older race — the ladies who were aged 
fifty years ago — the description is given by Lord 
Cockburn in strong and bold outline. I would pre- 
tend to nothing more than giving a few illustrative 
details from my own experience, which may assist 
the description by adding some practical realities to 
the picture. Several of them whom I knew in my 
early days certainly answered to many of those de- 
scriptions of Lord Cockburn. Their language and 
expressions had a zest and peculiarity which is gone, 
' I'rogs. 



94 ^^ miniscences of 

and which would not, I fear, do for modern Hfe and 
times. 

I have spoken of Miss Erskine of Dun, which is 
near Montrose. She, however, resided in Edinburgh, 
But those I knew best had lived many years in the 
then retired societv of a country town. Some were 
my own relations ; and in boyish days (for they had 
not generally much patience with boys) were looked 
up to with considerable awe as y^^y formidable per- 
sonages. Their characters and modes of expression 
in many respects, remarkably corresponded with Lord 
Cockburn's description. There was a dry Scottish 
humour which we fear their successors do not inherit. 
One of these Montrose ladies had many anecdotes 
told of her quaint ways and sayings. Walking in the 
street one day, slippery from frost, she fairly fell down. 
A young officer with much politeness came forward 
and picked her up, earnestly asking her at the same 
time, " I hope, ma'am, you are no worse ? " to which 
she replied, looking at him very steadily, " Indeed, 
sir, I'm just as little the better." A iQ\N days after, 
she met her military supporter in a shop. He was a 
fine tail youth, upwards of six feet high, and by way 
of making some grateful recognition for his late polite 
attention, she eyed him from head to foot ; and as she 
was of the opinion of the old Scotch lady, who de- 
clared she '' aye liked bonny fowk," she viewed her 
young friend with much satisfaction, but which she 
only evinced by the dry remark, '^ O'd, ye're a lang 
lad \ God gie ye grace." 



Scottish Life Sf Character. nr 

I had from a relative or intimate friend of two 
sisters of this school, well known about Glasgow, an 
odd account of what it seems from their own state- 
ment had passed between them at a country house, 
where they had attended a sale by auction. As the 
business of the day went on, a dozen of silver spoons 
had to be disposed of; and before they were put up 
for competition, they were, according to the usual 
custom, handed round for inspection to the company. 
When returned into the hands of the auctioneer, he 
found only eleven. In great wrath, he ordered the 
door to be shut, that no one might escape, and insist- 
ed on every one present being searched, to discover 
the delinquent. One of the sisters, in consternation, 
whispered to the other, ^'Esther, ye hae nae gotten 
the spune ? " to which the other replied, " Na ; but 
1 hae gotten Mrs. Siddons in my pocket." She had 
been struck by a miniature of the great actress, and 
quietly had pocketed it. The cautious reply of the 
sister was, " Then juist drop her, Esther." One 
of the sisterhood, a connection of my own, had 
much of this dry Scottish humour. She had a lodg- 
ing in the house of a respectable grocer ; and on her 
niece most innocently asking her, " \{ she was not 
very fond of her landlord," in reference to the excel- 
lence of her apartments and the attention he paid to 
her comfort, she demurred to the question, on the 
score of its propriety, by replying, " Fond of my 
landlord ! that would be an unaccountable fondness." 
An amusing account was given of an interview 



c}6 Remi/iiscen. es of 

and conversation between this lady and the provost 
of Montrose. She had demurred at paying some 
municipal tax u^ith which she had been charged, and 
the provost was anxious to prevent her getting into 
difficulty on the subject, and kindly called to convince 
her of the fairness of the claim, and the necessity of 
paying it. In his explanation he referred back to his 
own bachelor days when a similar payment had been 
required from him. " I assure you, ma'ani," he said, 
" when 1 was in your situation I was called upon in 
a similar way for this tax ;" to which she replied, in 
quiet scorn, " in my situation ! an' whan were ye in 
my situation — an auld maid leevin' in a flat wi' an 
ae lass?" But the complaints of such imposts v/ere 
urged in a wcLvy humorous manner by another Mon- 
trose old lady. Miss Helen Carnegy of Craigo ; she 
hated paying taxes, and alvv'ays pretended to misun- 
derstand their nature. One day, receiving a notice 
of such payment signed by the piovost (I'hom), she 
broke out : '^ I dinna understand thae taxes ; but I 
just think when Mrs. Thorn wants a new gown, the 
provost sends me a tax paper ! " 'I'he good lady's 
naive rejection of the idea that she could be in any 
sense *"' tond of her landlord," already referred to, 
v/as somewhat in unison with a similar feeling re- 
corded to have been expressed by the late Mr. Wil- 
son, the celebrated Scottish vocalist. He was taking 
lessons from the late Mr. Finlay Dun, one of the 
most accomplished musicians of his day. Mr. Dun 
had just returned from Italy, and, impressed with 



Scottish Life ^^ Character, 07 

admiration of the deep pathos, sentiment, and passion 
of the Italian school of music, he regretted to find in 
his pupil so lovely a voice and so much talent losing 
much of its effect for vv^ant of feeling. Anxious, 
therefore, to throw into his friend's performance 
something of the Italian expression, he proposed to 
bring it out by this suggestion : " Now, Mr. Wilson, 
just suppose that I am your lady-love, and sing to 
me as you could imagine yourself doing were you 
desirous of impressing her with your earnestness and 
affection." Poor Mr. Wilson hesitated, blushed, and 
under doubt how far such a personification even in 
his case was allowable, at last remonstrated, " Ay, 
Mr. Dun, ye forget I'm a married man !" 

A case has been reported of a country girl, how- 
ever, who thought it possible there might be an excess 
in such scrupulous regard to appearances. On her 
marriage-day, the youth to whom she was about to 
be united, said to her in a triumphant tone, " Weel, 
Jenny, haven't I been unco ceevil," alluding to the 
fact that during their whole courtship he had never 
even given her a kiss. Her quiet reply was, " Ou, 
ay, man ; senselessly ceevil." 

One of these Montrose ladies and a sister lived 
together ; and in a very quiet way they were in the 
habit of giving little dinner parties, to which occa- 
sionally they invited their gentlemen friends. How- 
ever, gentlemen were not always to be had ; and on 
one occasion, when such a difficulty had occurred, 
they were talking over the matter with a friend. 

7 



gS Reminiscefices of 

The one lady seemed to consider such an acquisitloh 
almost essential to the having a dinner at all. The 
other, who did not see the same necessity, quietly 
adding, " But, indeed, oor Jean thinks a man a per- 
fect salvation." 

There was occasionally a pawky semi-sarcastic hu- 
mour in the replies of some of the ladies we speak of 
that was quite irresistible, of which I have from a 
friend a good illustration in an anecdote well known 
at the time. A late well-known member of the Scot- 
tish bar, when a youth, was somewhat of a dandy, 
and, 1 suppose, somewhat short and sharp in his 
temper. He was going to pay a visit in the country, 
and was making a great fuss about his preparing and 
the putting up his habiliments. His old aunt was 
much annoyed at all this bustle, and stopped him by 
the somewhat contemptuous question, " Whaur's 
this you're gaun, Robby, that ye mak sic a grand 
wark about yer claes ? " The young man lost tem- 
per, and pettishly replied, " I'm going to the devil." 
" 'Deed, Robby, then," was the quiet answer, ," ye 
needna be sae nice, he'll juist tak ye as ye are." 

Ladies of this class had a quiet mode of expressing 
themselves on very serious subjects, which indicated 
their quaint power of description, rather than their 
want of feeling. Thus, of two sisters, when one 
had died, it was supposed that she had injured her- 
self by an imprudent indulgence in strawberries and 
cream, of which she had partaken in the country. 
A friend was condoling with the surviving sister, and, 



Scottish Lie (^'' Character. 95 

expressing her sorrow, had added, " I had hoped your 
sister was to live many years." To which her rela- 
tive rejoined — " Leeve ! hoo could she leeve ! she 
juist felled ^ hersell at Craigo wi' strawberries and 
cream !" However, she spoke with the same degree 
of coolness oF her own decease. For when her friend 
was comforting her in illness, by the hopes that she 
would, after winter, enjoy again some of their country 
spring butter, she exclaimed, without the slightest 
idea of being guilty of any irreverence, " Spring but- 
ter ! by that time I shall be buttering in heaven." 
When really dying, and when friends were round her 
bed, she overheard one of them saying to another, 
'' Her face has lost its colour ; it grows like a sheet 
of paper." The quaint spirit even then broke out in 
the remark, " Then I'm sure it maun be broon pa- 
per." A very strong-minded lady of the class, and, in 
Lord Cockburn's language, " indifferent about modes 
and habits," had been asking from a lady the charac- 
ter of a cook she was about to hire. The lady nat- 
urally entered a little upon her moral qualifications, 
and described her as a very decent woman ; the re- 
ply to which was, " Oh, d — n her decency ; can she 
make good collops ? " — an answer which would 
somewhat surprise a lady of Moray Place now, if 
engaged in a similar discussion of a servant's merits. 
I had two grand-aunts living at Montrose at that 
time — two Miss Ramsays of Balmain. They were 
somewhat of the severe class — Nelly especially, 
1 Killed. 



100 Reminiscences of 

who was an object rather of awe than of affection. 
She certainly had a very awful appearance to young 
apprehensions, from the strangeness of her head 
gear. Ladies of this class Lord Cockburn has spoken 
of as having their peculiarities embodied in curious 
outsides, as they dressed, spoke, and did exactly as 
they chose. As a sample of such curious outside 
and dress, my good aunt used to go about the house 
with an immense pillow strapped over her head — 
warm but formidable. These two maiden grand- 
aunts had a niece on a visit, an aunt of mine, who 
had made what they considered a very imprudent 
marriage, and where considerable poverty was likely 
to accompany the step she had taken. The poor 
niece had to bear many a slap directed to her im- 
provident union, as for example : One day she had 
asked for a piece of tape for some work she had in 
hand as a young wife expecting to become a mother. 
Miss Nelly said with much point, " Ay, Kitty, ye 
shall get a bit knittin' (i.e, a bit of tape). We hae 
a' thing ; we're no married." It was this lady who, 
by an inadvertent use of a term, shewed what was 
passing in her mind in a way which must have been 
quite transparent to the bystanders. At a supper 
which she was giving, she was evidently much an- 
noyed at the reckless and clumsy manner in which a 
gentleman was operating upon a ham which was at 
table, cutting out great lumps, and distributing them 
to the company. The lady said, in a very querulous 
tone, '^ Oh, Mr. Divet^ will you help Mrs. So and 



Scottish Life (f- Character. loi 

So?" — divet being a provincial term for a turf or 
sod cut out of the green, and the resemblance of it 
to the pieces carved out by the gentleman evidently 
having taken possession of her imagination. Mrs. 
Helen Carnegy of Craigo was a thorough specimen 
of this class of old Scottish ladies. She lived in 
Montrose, and died in 1818, at the advanced age of 
91. She was a Jacobite, and very aristocratic in her 
feelings, but on social terms with many burghers of 
Montrose, or Munross, as it was called. She pre- 
served a very nice distinction of addresses, suited to 
different individuals in the town, according as she 
placed them in the scale of her consideration. She 
liked a party at quadrille, and sent out her servant 
every morning to invite the ladies required to make 
up the game, and her directions were graduated thus 
— " Nelly, ye'll ging to Lady Carnegy's, and mak 
my compliments, and ask the honour of her lady- 
ship's company, and that of the Miss Carnegies, to 
tea this evening ; and if they canna come, ging to 
the Miss Mudies, and ask the pleasure of their com- 
pany ; and if they canna come, ye may ging to Miss 
Hunter and ask the favour of her company ; and if 
she canna come, ging to Lucky Spark and bid her 
comey 

Some of those ladies, as belonging to the old county 
families, had very high notions of their own impor- 
tance, and a great idea of their difference from the 
burgher families of the town. I am assured of the 
truth of the following naive specimen of such family 



102. Reminiscences of 

pride : — One of the olden maiden ladies of Montrose 
called one day on some ladies of one of the families 
in the neighbourhood, and on being questioned as to 
the news of the town said, "News! oh! Bailie 

's eldest son is to be married." " And pray," 

was the reply, " and pray, Miss , an' fa' ever 

heard o' a merchant i' the toon o' Montrose ha in 
an eldest son ? " 

At the beginning of this century, when the fear of 
invasion was rife, it was proposed to mount a small 
battery at the water-mouth by subscription, and Miss 
Carnegy was waited on by a deputation from the town 
council. One of them having addressed her on the 
subject, she heard him with some impatience, and 
when he had finished, she said, " Are ye ane o' the 
toon council ?" He replied, "I have that honour, 
ma'm." To which she rejoined, " Ye may hae that 
profit^ but honour ye hae nane ; " and then to the 
point, she added, " But I've been tell't that ae day's 
wark o' twa or three men wad mount the cannon, 
and that it may be a' dune for twenty shillings, now 
there's twa punds to ye." The councillor pocketed 
the money and withdrew. On one occasion, as she 
sat in an easy chair, having assumed the habits and 
privileges of age, Mr. Mollison, the minister of the 
Established Kirk, called on her to solicit for some 
charity. She did not like being asked for money, 
and, from her Jacobite principles, she certainly did 
not respect the Presbyterian Kirk. When he came 
in, she made an inclination of the head, and he said, 



Scottish Life cf Character. 103 

*' Don't get up, madam." She replied, " Get up ! I 
wadna rise out of my chair for King George himself, 
let abee a Whig minister." 

It is a curious subject the various shades of Scot- 
tish dialect and Scottish expressions, commonly called 
Scotticisms. We mark in the course of fifty years 
how some disappear altogether ; others become more 
and more rare, and of all of them we may sav, I think, 
that the specimens of them are to be looked for eve- 
ry year more in the descending classes of society. 
What was common amongst peers, judges, lairds, 
advocates, and people of family and education, is 
now found in humbler ranks of life. There are f^w 
persons perhaps who have been born in Scotland, 
and who have lived long in Scotland, whom a nice 
southern ear might not detect as from the north. 
But far beyond such nicer shades of distinction, there 
are strong and characteristic marks of a Caledo- 
nian origin with which some of us have had practi- 
cal acquaintance. I possess two curious, and now, 
I believe, rather scarce, publications on the prevalent 
Scotticisms of our speaking and writing. One is en- 
titled, "Scotticisms designed to Correct Improprieties 
of Speech and Writing," by Dr. Beattie of Aberdeen. 
The other is to the same purpose, and is entitled, 
" Observations on the Scottish Dialect," by the late 
Right Honourable Sir John Sinclair. Expressions 
which were common in their days, and used by per- 
sons of all ranks, are not known by the rising genera- 
tion. Many amusing equivoques used to be current, 



104 Reminhccnces of 

arising from Scotch people in England applying terms 
and expressions in a manner rather surprising to 
Southern ears. Thus, the story was told of a public 
character dear to the memory of Scotland, Henry 
Dundas (Viscount Melville), applying to Mr. Pitt 
for the loan of a horse ^'^ the length of Highgate," a 
very common expression in Scotland at that time to 
signify the distance to which the ride was to extend. 
Mr. Pitt good humouredly wrote back to say that he 
was afraid he had not a horse in his possession quite 
so long as Mr. Dundas had mentioned, but he had 
sent the longest he had. There is a well-known case 
of mystification, caused to English ears by the use of 
Scottish terms, which took place in the House of 
Peers during the examination of the Magistrates of 
Edinburgh touching the particulars of the Porteous 
Mob in 1736. The Duke of Newcastle having 
asked the Provost with what kind of shot the town- 
guard, commanded by Porteous, had loaded their 
muskets, received the unexpected reply, " Ou, juist 
sic as ane shutes dukes and sic-like fools wi'." The 
answer was considered as a contempt of the House 
of Lords, and the poor Provost would have suffered 
from misconception of his patois, had not the Duke 
of Argyle (who must have been exceedingly amused) 
explained that the worthy chief magistrate's expres- 
sion, when rendered into English, meant to describe 
the shot used for ducks and water-fowl. The circum- 
stance is referred to by Sir W. Scott in the notes to 
the Heart of Mid-Lothian. 



Scottish Life <^ Character, \o^ 

A very curious list may be made o words used in 
Scotland in a sense which would be ,^uite unintelligi- 
ble to southerns. Such applicatir is are going out, 
but I remember them well among c the old-fashioned 
people of Angus and the Mearns quite common in 
conversation. 1 subjoin some specimens : — 

Bestial signifies amongst Scottish agriculturists cat- 
tle generally, the whole 2^gregate number of beasts 
on the f^irm. Again, a Scottish farmer when he 
speaks of his " hogs," or of buying " hogs," has no 
reference to swine, but means young sheep, i.e.^ 
sheep before tl.cy have lost their first fleece. 

Discreet decs not bear the meaning of prudent or 
cautious, but of civil, kind, attentive. Such appli- 
cation of the word is said to have been made by Dr. 
Chalmers to the Bishop of Exeter. Those two 
eminent individuals had met for the first time at the 
hospitable house of the late Mr. A4urray, the pub- 
lisher. On the introduction taking place, the bishop 
expressed himself so warmly as to the pleasure it 
gave him to meet so distinguished and excellent a 
man as Dr. Chalmers, that the Doctor w^as quite 
overcome, and in a deprecating tone, said, " Oh, I 
JT» sure your lordship is very 'discreet.' " 

Enterteening has in olden Scottish usage the sense 
not of amusing, but of interesting. I remember an 
honest Dandie Dinmont on a visit to Bath. A lady, 
u^ho had taken a kind charge of him, accompanied 
him to the theatre, and in the most thrilling scene of 
Kemble*s acting, v^^hat is usually termed the dagger 



lo6 Reminiscences of 

scene in Macbeth, she turned to the farmer with a 
whisper, '' Is not that fine ? " to which the confiden- 
tial reply was, " Oh, mem, it's verra enterteening ! ** 
Enterteening expressing his idea of the interesting! 

Pig^ in old-fashioned Scotch, was always used for 
a coarse earthenware jar or vessel. In the life of 
the late Patrick Tytler, the amiable and gifted his- 
torian of Scotland, there occurs an amusing exempli- 
fication of the utter confusion of ideas caused by the 
use of Scottish phraseology. The family, when they 
went to London, had taken with them an old Scot- 
tish servant who had no notion of any terms beside 
her own. She came in one day greatly disturbed at 
the extremely backward state of knowledge of do- 
mestic affairs amongst the Londoners. She had been 
to so many shops and could not get " a great broon 
pig^ to baud the butter in." 

From a relative of the family I have received an 
account of a still worse confusion of ideas caused by 
the inquiry of a Mrs. Chisholm of Chisholm,who 
died in London in 1825, ^^ ^" advanced age. She 
had come from the country, to be with her daughter, 
and was a genuine Scottish lady of the old sclu)ol. 
She wished to purchase a table-cloth of a cheque 
pattern like the squares of a chess or draft-board. 
Now a draft-board used to be called (as I remember) 
by old Scotch people a " dam^ -brod."^ Accord- 

1 Earthenware vessel. 

2 dam^ the game of drafts. 

3 brod. the board. 



Scottish Life <^ Character, 107 

ingly, Mrs. Chlsholm entered the shop of a linen- 
draper, and asked to be shown table-linen a dam-hroa 
pattern. The shopman, although taken aback by a 
request, as he considered it, so strongly worded, by 
a respectable old lady, brought down what he assured 
her was the largest and widest made. No ; that 
would not do. She repeated her wish for a dam-brod 
pattern, and left the shop surprised at the stupidity 
of the London shopman not having the pattern she 
asked for. 

Silly has in genuine old Scottish use reference to 
weakness of body only, and not of mind. Before 
knowing the use of the word, I remember being 
much astonished at a farmer of the Mearns telling 
me of the strongest minded man in the county that 
he was " growing uncommon silly," not insinuating 
any decline of mental vigour, but only meaning that 
his bodily strength was giving way. 

Frail^ in like manner, expresses infirmity of body, 
and implies no charge of any laxity in moral prin- 
ciple ; yet I have seen English persons looking with 
considerable consternation when an old-fashioned 
Scottish lady, speaking of a young and graceful fe- 
male, lamented her being so frail. 

Fail is another instance of different use of words. 
In Scotland it used to be quite common to say of a 
person whose health and strength had declined, that 
he had failed. To say this of a person connected 
with mercantile business has a very serious effect 
upon Southern ears, as implying only bankruptcy 



lo8 Reminiscences of 

and ruin. 1 recollect many years ago at Monmouth, 
a Scottish lady creating much consternation in the 
mind of the mayor, by saying of a worthy man, the 
principal banker in the town, whom they both con- 
curred in praising, that she was " sorry to find he 
was failing. 

Honest has in Scotch a peculiar application, irre- 
spective of any integrity of moral character. It is 
a kindly mode of referring to an individual, as we 
would say to a stranger, ^' Honest man, would you 

tell me the way to ," or as Lord Hermand, 

when about to sentence a woman for stealing, began, 
remonstratively, " Honest woman, what garr'd ye 
steal your neighbour's tub." 

Superstitious : A correspondent informs me that in 
some parts of Alid-Lothian, the people constantly 
use the word " superstitious *' for " bigoted ; " thus, 
speaking of a very keen Free Church person, they 
will say, " he is awfu' supperstitious." 

Kail in England simply expresses cabbage, but in 
Scotland represents the chief meal of the day. Hence 
the old-fashioned easy way of asking a friend to din- 
ner was to ask him if he would take his kail with the 
family. In the same usage of the word, the Scottish 
proverb expresses distress and trouble in a person's 
aftairs, by saying that " he has got his kail through the 
reek." In like manner Haddock, in Kincardineshire 
and Aberdeenshire, used to express the same idea, as 
the expression is, '' Will ye tak your haddock wi' us 
the day ? " There is this difference however in the 



Scottish Life c^ Character. 109 

local usage, that to say in Aberdeen, Will you take 
your haddock, implies an invitation to dinner, whilst 
in Montrose the same expression means an invitation 
to supper. Differences of pronunciation also caused 
great confusion and misunderstanding. Novels used 
to be pronounced novels ; envy tnvy ; a cloak was a 
clock, to the surprise of an English lady, to whom 
the maid said, on leaving the house, "Mem, winna 
ye tak the clock wi' ye." 

There is indeed a case of Scottish pronunciation 
which adds to the force and copiousness of our lan- 
guage, by discriminating four words, which according 
to English speaking, are undisting.uishable from pro- 
nunciation. The words are -— wright (a carpenter), 
to write (with a pen), right (the reverse of wrong), 
rite (a ceremony). The four are however distin- 
guished in old-fashioned Scotch pronunciaticJn, thus 

I, He's a wiricht j 2, to wireete ; 3, richt ; 4, rite. 

I can remember a peculiar Scottish phrase very 
commonly used, which now seems to have passed 
away. I mean the expression " to let on," indicating 
the notice or observation of some thing, or of some 

person— For example, "I saw Mr. , at the 

meeting, but I never let on that I knew he was pres- 
ent." A form of expression which has been a great 
favourite in Scotland, in my recollection, has much 
gone out of practice, — I mean the frequent use of 
diminutives, generally adopted either as terms of en- 
dearment or of contempt. Thus, it was very common 
to speak of a person whom you meant rather to un- 



1 1 o Reminiscences of 

dervalue, as a mannie^ a hod'ie^ a bit bodie^ or a ivee hit 
mannie. The Bailie in Rob Roy, when he intended 
to represent his party as persons of no importance, 
used the expression, " We are bits o' Glasgow bod- 
ies." In a popular child's song, we have the endear- 
ing expression, "My wee bit laddie." We have 
known the series of diminutives, as applied to the 
canine race, very rich in diminution. There is — 
I. A dog ; 2. A doggie ; 3. A bit doggie ; 4. A wee 
bit doggie ; and even 5. A wee bit doggiekie. A 
correspondent has supplied me with a diminutive, 
which is of a more extravagant degree of attenuation 
than any I ever met with. It is this — " A peerie 
wee bit o' a manikinie." We used to hear such ex- 
pressions as those, which would not now be reckoned 
genteel : " Come in and get your bit dinner ;" " I 
hope you are now settled in your ain bit housie." 
In the Caldwell papers (page 39) we have an inter- 
esting case of a diminutive happily applied. It is 
recorded in the family that Mrs. Mure, on receiving 
from David Hume, on his death-bed, the copy of his 
history, which is still in the library of Caldwell, 
marked *' From the Author," she thanked him very 
warmly, and added in her native dialect, which she 
and the historian spoke in great purity, " O David, 
that's a book ye may weel be proud o', but before ye 
dee ye should burn a' your wee bukies ;" to which, 
raising himself, he replied with some vehemence, 
half offended, half in joke — " What for should I 
burn a' my wee bukies ? " He was too weak for 



Scottish Life ^ Character, 1 1 1 

discussion. He shook her hand and bade her fare- 
well. 

An admirable Scotch expression I recollect from 
one of the Montrose ladies before referred to. Her 
niece was asking a great many questions on some point 
concerning which her aunt had been giving her infor- 
mation, and coming over and over the ground, demand- 
ing an explanation how this had happened, and why- 
something else was so and so. The old lady lost her 
patience, and at last burst forth : " I winna be back- 
speired noo, Pally FuUerton.*' Back-speired ! how 
much more pithy and expressive than cross-exam- 
ined ! Another capital expression to mark that a 
person has stated a point rather under than over the 
truth, is "The less I lee," as in Guy Mannering, 
where the precentor exclaims to Mrs. MacCandlish, 
" Aweel, gudewife, then the -less I lee." We have 
found it a very amusing task collecting together a 
number of these phrases, and forming them into a 
connected epistolary composition. We may imagine 
the sort of puzzle it would be to a young person 
of the present day — one of what we may call the 
new school. We will suppose an English young 
lady, or an English educated young lady, lately mar- 
ried, receiving such a letter as the following from the 
Scottish aunt of her husband. We may suppose it to 
be written by a very old lady, who, for the last fifty 
years, has not moved from home, and has changed 
nothing of her early days. I can safely affirm that 
every word of it I have either seen written in a letter, 
or have heard in ordinary conversation : — 



1 1 2 Reminisce7ices of 

" Montr ou ^ 
"My dear Niece — I am real glad to find my 
nevy has made so good a choice as to have secured 
you for his wife ; and I am sure this step will add 
much to his comfort, and we behove to rejoice at it. 
He will now look forward to his evening at home, 
and you will be happy because you will never want 
him. It will be a great pleasure when you hear him 
in the trance^ and wipe his feet upon the hass. But 
Willy is not strong, and you must look well after 
him. I hope you do not let him snuff 'io much as 
he did. He had a sister, poor thing, who died early. 
She was remarkably clever, and well read, and most 
intelligent, but was always uncomm.only silly? In 
the autumn of '40 she had a sair host^ and was aye 
speaking through a cold^ and at dinner never did more 
than to sup a few family broth. I am afraid she did 
not change her feet when she came in from the wet 
one evening. 1 never let on that I observed anything 
to be wrong ; but I remember asking her to come 
and sit upon the fire. But she went out and did not 
take the door with her. She lingered till next spring, 
when she had a great income.^ and her parents were 
then too poor to take her south, and she died. I 
hope you will like the lassie Eppie we have sent you. 
She is a discreet girl^ and comes of a decent family. 
She has a sister married upon a Seceding minister at 
Kirkcaldy. But 1 hear he expects to be transportea 

1 The Scotticisms are prin'.ed in Italics. 

2 Delicate in health. 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 113 

soon. She was brought up in one of the hospitals 
here. Her father had been a souter and a pawky chieL 
enough, but was doited iox years, and her mother was 
sair dottted. We have been greatly interested in the 
hospital where Eppie was educate^ and intended get- 
ting up a bazaar for it, and would have asked you to 
help us, as we were most anxious to raise some ad- 
ditional funds, when one of the bailies died and left 
it 10,000 pounds, which was really a great mortifica' 
tion. I am not a good hand of write ^ and therefore 
shall stop. I am very tired, and have been gantin 
for this half hour, and even in correspondence gant- 
in' may be smittiri'. The kitchen ^ is just coming in, 
and \feel a smell of tea^ so when I get rciy four hours^ 
that will refresh me and set me up again. — I am 
your affectionate aunt, Isabel Dingwall." 

This letter, then, we suppose written by a very 
old Forfarshire lady to her niece in England, and 
perhaps the young lady who received this letter 
might answer it in a style as strange to her aunt as 
her aunt's is to her, especially if she belonged to that 
lively class of our young female friends who indulge 
a little in phraseology which they have imbibed from 
their brothers or male cousins, who have perhaps, 
for their amusement, encouraged them in its use. 
The answer, then, might be something like this ; 
and without meaning to be severe or satirical upon 
our young lady friends, I may truly say that though 
1 Tea-urn. 
8 



114 Reminiscences of 

I never heard from one young lady all these fast 
terms^ I have heard the most of them separately from 
many : — 

" My dear Aunty, — Many thanks for your kind 
letter and its enclosure. From my not knowing 
Scotch, I am not quite up to the v^hole, and some 
of the expressions I don't twig at all. Willie is 
absent for a few days, but when he returns home 
he will explain it ; he is quite awake on all such 
things. I am glad you are pleased that Willie and 
I are now spliced. I am well aware that you will 
hear me spoken of in some quarters as a fast young 
lady, but don't believe them. We are certainly 
very happy at present. Willie comes home from 
the office every afternoon at five. We generally 
take a walk before dinner, and read and work if we 
don't go out ; and I assure you we are very jolly. 
We don't know many people here yet. It is 
rather a swell neighbourhood ; and if we can't get 
in with the nobs, depend upon it we will never take 
up with any society that is decidedly snobby. I 
daresay the girl you are sending will be very useful 
to us ; our present one is a very slow coach. But 
we hope some day to sport buttons. My father 
and mother paid us a visit last week. The governor 
is well, and, notwithstanding years and infirmities, 
comes out quite a jolly old cove. He is, indeed, if 
you will pardon the partiality of a daughter, a regular 
brick. He says he will help us if we can't get on, 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 1 1 5 

and I make no doubt will in due time fork out the 
tin. I am busy working a cap for you, dear aunty ; 
it is from a pretty German pattern, and I think when 
finished will be quite a stunner, I have a shop in 
Regent Street, where I hire patterns and return them 
without buying them, which I think a capital dodge. 
1 hope you will sport it for my sake the first tea-party 
you give. 

'' I have nothing particular to say, but am always 
" Your affectionate niece, 

"Eliza Dingwall." 

" P. S. — I am trying to break Willie off his 
horrid habit of taking snuff. I had rather see him 
take his cigar when we are walking. You will be 
told, I daresay, that I sometimes take a weed myself. 
It is not true, dear aunty.'* 

Before leaving the question of change in Scottish 
expressions, it may be proper to add a {qw words on 
the subject of Scottish dialects — /. <?., on the differ- 
ences which exist in different counties or localities in 
the Scottish tongue itself. These differences used 
to be as marked as different languages ; of course they 
still exist among the peasantry as before. The 
change consists in their gradual vanishing from the 
conversation of the educated and refined. The dia- 
lects with which I am most conversant, are the two 
which present the greatest contrast, viz., the Angus 
and the Aberdeen, or the slow and broad Scotch — 



1 1 6 Reminiscences of 

the quick, and sharp Scotch. Whilst the one talks 
of " buuts and shoon," the other calls the same arti- 
cles " beets and sheen." With the Aberdonian, 
" what " is always "fat," or " fatten," " music " is 
" meesic," " brutes," are " breets ;" " What are ye 
duing," of Southern Scotch, in Aberdeen would be 
" Fat are ye deein' ? " * Thus, when a Southerner 

1 Fergusson, nearly a century ago, noted this peculiarity of 
dialect in his poem of The Leith Races : — 

*' The Buchan bodies through the beach. 
Their bunch of Findrams cry ; 
And skirl out bauld in Norland speech, 
Gude speldans,yiz will buy." 

" Findon," or *' Finnan baddies," are split, smoked, and par- 
tially dried haddocks. Fergusson, in using the word '" Fin- 
drams^'' which is not found in our glossaries, has been thought 
to be in error, but his accuracy has been verified, singularly 
enough, within the last few days, by a worthy octogenarian 
Newhaven fisherman, bearing the characteristic name of 
Flucker, who remarked *' that it was a word commonly used 
in his youth ; and, above all," he added, " when Leith Races 
were held on the sands ye was like to be deeved wi' the lang- 
tongued hizzies skirling out '■Aell a Findram Speldrains,'' and 
they jist ca'ed it that to get a better grip o't wi' their tongues." 

In Galloway, in 1684, Symson, afterwards an ousted Episco- 
palian minister (of Kirkinner), notes some peculiarities in the 
speech of the people in that district. " Some of the countrey 
people, especially those of the elder sort, do very often omit 
the letter ' h ' after * t ' as ting for thing ; tree for three ; tatch 
for thatch ; wit for with ; fait for faith ; mout for mouth, etc. ; 
and also, contrary to some north countrey people, they often- 
times pronounce ' w ' for ' v,' as serwant for servant ; and so 
they call the months of February, March, and April the =ware 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 1 1 7 

mentioned the death of a friend, a sharp lady of the 
granite city asked '* Fat deed he o' ? " which being 
utterly incomprehensible to the person asked, another 
Aberdonian lady kindly explained the question, and 
put it into language which she supposed could not be 
mistaken, as thus, "Fat did he dee o' ? " " Doin " and 
" dying '* being both Aberdonice " deeing^^ gave rise 
to an amusing equivoque on the part of my esteemed 
friend Mr. R. Chambers. In the summer of 1859 
there were few successful fields of turnips. Calling 
with two friends, who were sufferers in this way, on 
a Brechin farmer who was amongst the fortunate ex- 
ceptions^ Mr. Chambers asked him about his turnips, 
to which he answered, " Ou, they're deein rale 
weel ;" when Mr. Chambers affecting to misunder- 
stand as to the phraseology, turned to his two friends 
and remarked, " You see it's a perishing crop every- 
where.'* Another ludicrous interrogatory occurred 
regarding the death of a Mr. 7'homas Thomson. 
It appeared there were two cousins of this name, 
both corpulent men. When it was announced that 
Mr. Thomas Thomson was dead, an Aberdeen friend 

quarter, from n)er.'^ Hence their common proverb, speaking 
of the stormes in February, ' Winter ne'ver comes till loare 
comes.'' " These peculiarities of language have almost disap- 
peared — the immense influx of Irish emigrants during late 
years having exercised a perceptible influence over the dialect 
of Wigtonshire. 

1 Fer. The spring months — e, g. 

" This wes in 'ver quhen wynter tid." — Barbour. 



1 1 8 Rem.iniscences of 

of the family asked, " Fatten Thamas Thamson ? '' 
He was informed that it was a fat Thomas Thom- 
son, upon which the Aberdeen query naturally arose, 
" Aye, but fatten fat Thamas Thamson ? " A 
young lady from Aberdeen had been on a visit to 
Montrose, and was disappointed at finding there a 
great lack of beaus, and balls, and concerts. This 
lack was not made up to her by the invitations which 
she had received to dinner parties. And she thus 
expressed her feelings on the subject in tier native 
dialect, when asked how she liked Montrose, " In- 
deed there's neither men nor meesic, and fat care I 
for meat." The dialect and the local feelings of 
Aberdeen were said to have produced some amuse- 
ment in London, when displayed by the lady of the 
Provost of Aberdeen when accompanying her hus- 
band going up officially to the capital. Some per- 
sons to whom she had been introduced recommended 
her going to the opera as one of the sights worthy 
the attention of a stranger. The good lady, full of 
the greatness of her situation as wife of the provost, 
and knowing the sensation her appearance in public 
occasioned when in her own city, and supposing that 
a like excitement would accompany her with the Lon- 
don public, rather declined, under the modest plea, 
" Fat for should I gang to the opera, just to creat a 
confeesion." An aunt of mine, who knew Aberdeen 
well, used to tell a traditionary story of two Aber- 
donian ladies who, by their insinuations against each 
other, finely illustrated the force of the dialect then 



Scottish Life ^ Character, iig 

in common use. They had both of them been very 
attentive to a sick lady in declining health, and on 
her death each had felt a distrust of the perfect dis- 
interestedness of the other's attention. This created 
more than a coolness between them, and the bad feel- 
ing came out on their passing in the street. The 
one insinuated her suspicions of unfair dealing by 
the property of the deceased by ejaculating, as the 
other passed her, " henny pig ' and green tea," to 
which the other retorted, in the same spirit, " Silk 
coat and negligee ! "^ 

I suppose no changes of the last half century 
have been more remarkable than those which have 
taken place in the dialect and general manners of 
our Scottish judges. As a class of society, they 
have been, of course, marked^ men. Many were 
celebrated for humour, conviviality, and a consider- 
able degree of eccentricity of manners and habits ; 
many of them were equally remarkable, too, for 
acute and powerful minds — distinguished for pro- 
found knowledge of law, and ready tact in the 
application of its general principles. I have two 
anecdotes to shew, that, both in social and judicial 
life, a remarkable change must have taken place 
amongst the " fifteen." I am assured that the fol- 
lowing scene took place at the table of Lord Pol- 
kemmet, at a dinner party in his hciuse. When 
the covers were removed, the dinner A\^as seen to 
consist of veal broth, a roast fillet of veal, veal 
I Honey jar. 2 a female garment then in common use. 



1 20 Reminiscences of 

cutlets, a florentine (an excellent old Scottish dish 
composed of veal), a calf's head, calf's foot jelly. 
The worthy judge could not help observing a sur- 
prise on the countenance of his guests, and perhaps 
a simper on some ; so he broke out in explanation : 
" Ou ay, it's a cauf ; w^hen we kill a beast we just 
eat up ae side and doun the tither." The expressions 
he used to describe his own judicial preparations for 
the bench, were very characteristic : " Ye see I first 
read a' the pleadings, and then, after letting them 
wamble in my wame wi' the toddy twa or three 
days, I gie my ain interlocutor." For a moment 
suppose such anecdotes to be told now of any of our 
high legal functionaries. Imagine the feelings of 
surprise that would be called forth were the present 
Justice-Clerk to adopt such imagery in describing 
the process of preparing his legal judgment on a 
difficult case in his court ! 

In regard to the wit of the Scottish har. It is a 
subject which I do not pretend to illustrate. It 
would require a volume for itself. One anecdote, 
however, I cannot resist, and I record it as forming 
a striking example of the class of Scottish humour 
which, with our dialect, has lost its distinctive char- 
acteristics. John Clerk (afterwards a judge by the 
title of Lord Eldin), was arguing a Scotch appeal 
case before the House of Lords. His client claimed 
the use of a mill-stream by prescriptive right. Mr. 
Clerk spoke broad Scotch, and argued that " the 
waiter had rin that way for forty years. Indeed 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 121 

naebody kenned how long, and why should his client 
now be deprived of the watter, etc." The Chan- 
cellor, much amused at the pronunciation of the 
Scottish advocate, in a rather bantering tone, asked 
him, " Mr. Clerk, do you spell water in Scotland 
with two t's ? " Clerk, a little nettled at this hit at 
his national tongue, answered, " Na, my lord, we 
dirma spell watter (making the word as short as he 
could) wi' twa t's. But we spell maimers (making 
the word as long as he could) wi' twa n's." 

Under this head of Scottish dialect, language, and 
phraseology, we naturally introduce some notice of 
that most interesting subject connected with our 
national literature which belongs to Scottish pro- 
verbial expressions. It is an old remark, that the 
characteristics of a people are always found in such 
sayings, and the expression of Bacon has been often 
quoted — "The genius, wit, and wisdom of a nation 
are discovered by their proverbs." Now, as there 
can be no doubt that there are proverbs exclusively 
Scottish, and that as in them we find also many traits 
of Scottish character, and many peculiar forms of 
Scottish thought and Scottish language, sayings of 
this kind, once so familiar, should have a place in 
our Scottish reminiscences. Indeed, proverbs are 
literally, in many instances, become reminiscences 
They now seem to belong to that older generation 
whom we recollect, and who used them in conversa- 
tion freely and constantly. To strengthen an argu- 
ment, or illustrate a remark by a proverb, was then a 



122 Reminiscences of 

common practice in conversation. Their use, how- 
ever, is now considered vulgar, and their formal ap- 
plication is almost prohibited by the rules of polite 
society. Lord Chesterfield denounced the practice 
of quoting proverbs as a palpable violation of all 
polite refinement in conversation. Notwithstanding 
all this, we acknowledge having much pleasure in 
recalling our national proverbial expressions. T'hey 
are full of character, and we find amongst them im- 
portant truths, expressed forcibly, wisely, and grace- 
fully. 

All nations have their proverbs, and a vast num- 
ber of books have been written on the subject. We 
find, accordingly, that collections have been made of 
proverbs considered as belonging peculiarly to Scot- 
land. The collections to which I have had access 
are the following : — 

1. The fifth edition, by Balfour, of " Ray's Com- 
plete Collection of English proverbs," in which is 
a separate collection of those which are considered 
Scottish Proverbs — 1813. Ray professes to have 
taken these from Fergusson's work rnentioned below. 

2. A Complete Collection of Scottish Proverbs 
explained and made intelligible to the English reader, 
by James Kelly, M.A., published in London 1721. 

3. Scottish Proverbs gathered together by David 
Fergusson, sometime minister at Dunfermline, and 
put ord'tne alphabetico when he departed this lile anno 
1598. Edinburgh, 1641. 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 123 

4. A Collection of Scots Proverbs, dedicated to 
the Tenantry of Scotland, by Allan Ramsay. This 
collection is found in the edition of his Poetical 
Works, 3 vols, post octavo, Edin., 18 18, but is nut 
in the handsome edition of 1800. London, 2 vols. 
8vo.i 

5. Scottish Proverbs, collected and arranged by 
Andrew Henderson. With an Introductory Essay 
by W. Motherwell. Edin. 1832. 

6. The Proverbizfl Philosophy of Scotland, an ad- 
dress to the School of Arts, by William Stirling of 
Keir, M.P. Stirling and Edin. 1855. 

The collection of Ray, the great English natural- 
ist, is well known. The two first editions, published 
at Cambridge in 1670 and 1678, were by the author; 
subsequent editions were by other editors. 

The work by James Kelly professes to collect 
Scottish proverbs only. It is a volume of nearly 400 
pages, and contains a short explanation or commen- 
tary attached to each, and often parallel sayings from 
other languages.2 Mr. Kelly bears ample testimony 
to the extraordinary free use made of proverbs in his 
time by his countrymen and by himself. He says 
that " there were current in society upwards of 3000 
proverbs, exclusively Scottish." He adds, " the 

1 This was pointed out to me by Sir John Melville, who 
kindly supplied me with the 3 volume edition. 

8 Amongst many acts of kindness and essential assistance 
which I have received and am constantly receiving from my 
friend Mr. Hugh James Rollo, I owe my introduction to this 
interesting Scottish volume, now I believe rather scarce. 



1 24 Reminiscences of 

Scots are wonderfully given to this way of speaking, 
and as the consequence of that, abound with prov- 
erbs, many of which are very expressive, quick, 
and home to the purpose ; and, indeed, this humour 
prevails universally over the whole nation, especially 
among the better sort of the commonalty, none of 
whom will discourse with you any considerable time, 
but he will affirm every assertion and observation 
with a Scottish proverb. To that nation I owe my 
birth and education ; and to that manner of speaking, 
I was used from my infancy, to such a degree that I 
became in some measure remarkable for it." This 
was written in 172 1, and we may see from Mr. Kel- 
ly's account what a change has taken place in society 
as regards this mode of intercourse. Our author 
states that he has "omitted in his collection many 
popular proverbs which are very pat and expressive,'* 
and adds as his reason, that " since it does not be- 
come a man of manners to use them, it does not 
become a man of my age and profession to write 
them." What was Mr. Kelly's profession or what 
his age does not appear from any statements in this 
volume ; but, judging by many proverbs which he 
has retained^ those which consideration of years and 
of profession induced him to omit, must have been 
bad indeed, and unbecoming for any age or any pro- 
fession.^ The third collection by Mr. Fergusson is 
mentioned by Kelly as the only one which had been 

1 Kelly's book is constantly quoted by Jamieson, and is, in- 
deed, an excellent work for the study of good old Scotch. 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 125 

made before his time, and that he had not met with 
it till he had made considerable progress in his own 
collection. The book is now extremely raje, and 
fetches a high price. By the great kindness of the 
learned librarian, I have been permitted to see the 
copy belonging to the library of the Writers to the 
Signet. It is the first edition and very rare. A 
quaint little thin volume, such as delight the eyes of 
true bibliomaniacs, unpaged, and published at Edin- 
burgh, 164 1 — although on the title-page the prov- 
erbs are said to have been collected at Mr. Fergus- 
son's death, 1598.^ There is no preface or notice 
by the author, but an address from the printer, " to 
the merrie, judicious, and discreet reader." 

The proverbs, amounting to 945, are given with- 
out any comment or explanation ; many of them are 
of a very antique cast of language ; indeed some 
would be to most persons quite unintelligible with- 
out a lexicon. 

The printer, in this address, "to the merrie, 
judicious, and discreet reader," refers in the follow- 
ing quaint expressions to the author : — " Therefore 
manie in this realme that hath hard of David Fer- 
gusson, sometime minister at Dunfermline, and ot 
his quick answers and speeches, both to great persons 
and others inferiours, and hath heard of his proverbs 
which hee gathered together in his time, and now 
we put downe according to the order of the alpha- 

1 This probably throws back the collection to about the mid- 
dle of the century. 



1 26 Reminiscences of 

bet ; and manie of all ranks of persons, being verie 
desirous to have the said proverbs, I have thought 
good to put them to the presse for thy better satis- 
faction. ... I know that there may be some 
that will say and marvell that a minister should have 
taken pains to gather such proverbs together \ but 
they that knew his forme of powerfuU preaching the 
woid, and his ordinar talking, ever almost using 
proverbiall speeches, will not finde fault with this 
that hee hath done. And whereas there are some 
old Scottish words not in use now, bear with that, 
because if ye alter those words, the proverb will 
have no grace \ and so, recommending these prov- 
erbs to thy good use, I bid thee farewell." 

I now subjoin a few of Fergusson's Proverbs, 
verbatim, which are of a more obsolete character, 
and have appended explanations, of the correctness 
of which, however, I am not quite confident : — 

A year a nurish^ seven year a da? Refers, I 
presume, to fulfilling the maternal office. 

Anes paytt never cravit. Debts once paid give 
no more trouble. 

All wald^ have all^ all wald forgie.^ Those who 
exact much should be ready to concede. 

A gangang ^ fit^ is aye ^ gettin (gin ^ it were but a 
thorn)^ or, as it sometimes run, gin it were but a 
broken tae^ i. e.^ toe. A man of industry will cer- 
tainly get a living, though the proverb is often 

1 Nurse. 2£)aw, aslut. 3 Would. 4 Porgive. ^ Going or 
moving. 6 Foot. 7 Always. 8 if. 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 127 

applied to those who went abroad and got a mischief 
when they might safely have stayed at home. — 
(Kelly.) 

Ml crakes^ all hears? Spoken against bullies 
who keep a great hectoring, and yef, when put to it, 
tamely pocket an affront. — (Kelly.) 

Bourd^ not wi bawt'ie.^ {lest he bite you). Do 
not jest too familiarly with your superiors (Kelly), 
or with dangerous characters. 

Bread's house skailed never. ^ While people have 
bread they need not give up housekeeping. Spoken 
when one has bread and wishes something better. -^ 
(Kelly.) 

Crabbit^ was and cause had. Spoken ironically of 
persons put out of temper without adequate cause, 

Dame^ deem '^ warily ( ye watna ^ wha wytes ^ yer- 
sell). — Spoken to remind those who pass harsh 
censures on others that they may themselves be 
censured. 

Efter lang mint'^^ never dint.^^ Spoken of long and 
painful labour producing little effect. Kelly's read- 
ing is " Lang mint little dint.'*' Spoken when men 
threaten much and dare not execute. — (Kelly.) 

Fill fou ^^ and haud^^ fou maks a stark ^^ man. In 
Border language a stark man was one who takes and 
keeps boldly. 

1 Boasters. ^ Used is cowards (?). 3 Jest. 4 A dog's 
name. * To skail house, to disfurnish. 6 Being angry or cross, 
7 Judge. 8 Know not. 9 Blames. I'* To aim at. 1^ A stroke. 
12 Full. 13 Hold. 14 Potent or strong. 



128 Reminiscences of 

He that crabbs ^ without cause should mease ^ with' 
out mends.^ Spoken to remind those who are angry 
without cause, that they should not be particular in 
requiring apologies from others. 

He is worth na weill that may not bide na was. 
He deserves not the sweet that will not taste the 
sour. He does not deserve prosperity who cannot 
meet adversity. 

Kame^ sindle^ kame sair.^ Applied to those who 
forbear for a while, but when once roused can act 
with severity. 

Kamesters'^ are aye creeshie.^ It is usual for men 
o look like their trade. 

Let alone makes mony lurden.^ Want of correc- 
tion makes many a bad boy. — (Kelly.) 

Mony tynes^^ the half mark^^ whinger '^'^ {for the 
halfe pennie whang.) '^^ Another version of penny 
wise and pound foolish. 

Na plie ^^ is best. 

Reavers ^^ should not be rewers.^^ Those who are 
so fond of a thing as to snap at it, should not repent 
when they have got it. — (Kelly.) 

1 Is angry. 2 Setde. 3 Amends. 4 Comb. 5 Seldom, 
fi Painfully. 7 "VVool combers. 8 Greasy. 9 Worthless fellow. 
^^ Loses, ^l Sixpenny. 

12 A sort of dagger or hanger which seems to have been used 
both at meals as a knife and in broils — 

And nvhingers now in friendship bare, 

The social meal to part and share, 

Had found a bloody sheath. — Lay of the Last Minstrel 

13 Thong. 14 No lawsuit. 15 Robbers 16 Rue, to lepent. 



Scottish Life ^ Character, 129 

Sokand seill is best. The interpretation of this 
proverb is not obvious, and later writers do not 
appear to have adopted it from Fergusson. It is 
quite clear that Sok or Sock is the ploughshare. Seil 
is happiness,, as in Kelly. " Seil comes not till 
sorrow^ be o'er ; " and in Aberdeen they say, " Seil 
o' your face," to express a blessing. My reading is 
" the plough and happiness the best lot." The 
happiest life is the healthy country one. See Robert 
Burns' spirited song with the chorus — 

*' Up wi' my ploughman lad, 
And hey my merry ploughman, 

Of a' the trades that I do ken, 
Commend me to the ploughman." 

A somewhat different reading of this very obscure 
and now indeed obsolete proverb has been suggested 
by an esteemed and learned friend — " I should say 
rather it meant that the ploughshare, or country life, 
accompanied with good luck or fortune, was best ; 
/. ^., that industry coupled with good fortune (good 
seasons and the like), was the combination that was 
most to be desired. Scet in Anglo-Saxon as a noun 
means opportunity^ and then good luck, happiness, etc. 

There's mae ^ madines ^ nor makines^ Girls are 
more plentiful in the world than hares. 

Ye hried^ of the gouk^ ye have not a rhyme ^ hut ane. 
Applied to persons who tire every body by constantly 
harping on one subject. 

1 More. 2 Maidens. 3 Hares. * Take after. * Cuckoo. 
6 Note. 



1^0 Rcmimscences of 

The collection by Allan Ramsay is very good, and 
professes to correct the errors of ft)rmer collectors. 
I have now before me the first edition^ Edinburgh, 
1737, vi'ith the appropriate motto on the title-page, 
" That maun be true that a* men say." This edition 
contains proverbs only, the number being 2464. 
Some proverbs in th's collection I do not find in 
others, and one quality it possesses in a remarkable 
degree, — it is very Scotch. The language of the 
proverbial u^isdom has the true Scottish flavour ; not 
only is this the case with the proverbs themselves, 
but the dedication to the tenantry of Scotland, pre- 
fixed to the collection, is written in pure Scottish 
dialect. From this dedication I make an extract, 
which falls in with our plan of recording Scotch 
reminiscences, as Allan Ramsay there states the 
great value set upon proverbs in his day, and the 
importance which he attaches to them as teachers of 
moral wisdom, and as combining amusement witli 
instruction. The prose of Allan Ramsay has, too, 
a spice of his poetry in its composition. His dedi- 
cation is. To the tenantry of Scotland, farmers of 
the dales, and storemasters of the hills — 

" Worthy friends — The following hoard of wise 
sayings and observations of our forefathers, which 
have been gathering through mony byganc ages, I 
have collected with great care, and restored to their 
proper sense. . 

" As naething helps our happiness mair than to 
have the mind made up wi' right principles, I desire 



Scottish Life c^^ Character, 131 

you, For the thriving an' pleasure of you and yours, 
to use your een and ler.d your lugs to these guid auld 
saws, that shine wi' wail'd sense, and will as lang as 
the warld wags. Gar your bairns get them by heart ; 
let them have a place among your family-books, and 
may never a window sole through the country be 
without them. On a spare hour, when the day is 
clear, behind a ruck, or on the green howm, draw 
the treasure frae your pouch, an' enjoy the pleasant 
companion. Ye happy herds, while your hirdsell are 
feeding on the flowery braes, you may eithly make 
yoursells master of the haleware. How usefou' will 
It prove to you (wha hae sae few opportunities of 
common clattering) when ye forgather wi' your 
friends at kirk or market, banquet or bridal ! By 
your proficiency you'll be able, in the proverbial way, 
to keep up the saul of a conversation that is baith 
blyth an' usefou'." 

Mr. Henderson's work is a compilation from those 
already mentioned. It is very copious, and the in- 
troductory essay contains some excellent remarks 
upon the wisdom and wit of Scottish proverbial say- 
ings. 

Mr. Stirling's address, like everything he writes, 
indicates a minute and profound knowledge of his 
subject, and is full of picturesque and just views of 
human nature. He attaches much importance to the 
teaching conveyed in proverbial expressions, and rec- 
ommends his hearers even still to collect such pro- 
verbial expressions as may yet linger in conversation, 



132 Reminiscences of 

because, as he observes, " If it is not yet registered, it 
is possible that it might have died with the tongue from 
which you took it, and so have been lost for ever." 
*' I believe," he adds," the number of good old saws 
still floating as waifs and strays on the tide of popular 
talk to be much greater than might at first appear." 

One remark is applicable to all these collections, 
viz., that out of so large a number there are many 
of them on which we have little grounds for decid- 
ing that they are exclusively Scottish. \i\ fact, some 
are mere translations of proverbs adopted by many na- 
tions ; some of universal adoption. Thus we have — 

A burnt bairn fire dreads. 

Ae S'voalloix) makes nae simmer. 

Faint heart neer nvan fair lady. 

Ill iveeds ivax iveel. 

Mony smas mak a fnuckle. 

O t-iva ills chuse the least. 

Set a kna've to grip a knave. • 

T'voa 'wits are better than ane. 

There'' s nae fule to an auldfule. 

Te canna make a silk purse 0' a soiv''s lug. 

Ae bird i' the hand is nvorth tiua fleeing. 

Mony cooks neer made gude kail. 

Of numerous proverbs such as these, some may 
or may not be original in the Scottish. Air. Stirling 
remarks, that many of the best and oldest proverbs 
may be common to all people — may have occurred 
to all. In our national collections, therefore, some of 
the proverbs recorded may be simply translations into 
Scotch of what have been long considered the prop- 



Scottish Life 8f Character, 133 

erty of other nations. Still, I hope, it is not a mere 
national partiality to say that many of the common 
proverbs gain much by such translation from other 
tongues. All that J would attempt now is, to select 
some of our more popular proverbial sayings, which 
many of us can remember as current amongst us, 
and were much used by the late generation in society,' 
and to add a few from the collections I have named, 
which bear a very decided Scottish stamp either in 
turn of thought or in turn of language. 

I remember being much struck the first time I 
heard the application of that pretty Scottish saying 
regarding a fair bride. I was walking in Montrose, 
a day or two before her marriage, with a young lady 
a connection of mine, who merited this description, 
when she was kindly accosted by an old friend, an 
honest fishwife of the town, " Weel, Miss Elizabeth, 
hae ye gotten a' yer claes ready;" to which the ■ 
young lady modestly answered, *' Oh, Janet, my 
claes are soon got ready ; " and Janet replied, in 
the old Scottish proverb, " Ay, v,^d, a bonny bride's 
sum buskttr-^ In the old collection, an addition less 
sentimental is made to this proverb, A short horse is 
sune ivispitP' 

To encourage strenuous exertions to meet difficult 
circumstances, is well expressed by Setting a stout 
heart to a stey brae. This mode of expressing that 
the worth of a handsome woman outweighs even her 
beauty has a very Scottish character — ^'/^/i better 
' ^"''"^^- 2 Curried. 



134 Reminiscences of 

than she^s bonny. The opposite of this was expressed 
by a Highlander of his own wife, when he somewhat 
ungrammatically said of her, " She's bonnier than 
she's better.'' 

The frequent evil to harvest operations frotn au- 
tumnal rains and fogs in Scotland, is well told in the 
saying, A dry summer ne'er made a dear peck. 

There can be no question as to country in the fol- 
lowing, which seems to express generally that per- 
sons may have the name and appearance of greatness 
without the reality — A' Stuarts are na sib ^ to the 
king. 

There is an excellent Scottish version of the com- 
mon proverb, *' He that's born to be hanged will 
never be drowned." — The water will never warr'^ 
the widdie.^ i.e., never cheat the gallows. This say- 
ing received a very naive practical application during 
the anxiety and alarm of a storm. One of the pas- 
sengers, a good simple-minded minister, was sharing 
the alarm that was felt round him, until, spying one 
of his parishioners, of whose ignominious end he had 
long felt persuaded, exclaimed to himself, " O, we 
are all safe now," and accordingly accosted the poor 
man with strong assurances of the great pleasure he 
had in seeing him on board. 

It's ill getting the hreeks aff the Highlandman., is 

a proverb that savours very strong of a Lowland 

Scotch origin. Having suffered loss at the hands of 

their neighbours from the hills, this was a mode of 

1 Related, ' 3 Outrun. 



Scottish Life §f Character. 135 

expressing the painful truth, that there was little hope 
of obtaining redress from those who had not the 
means of supplying it. 

Proverbs connected with the bagpipes I set down 
as legitimate Scotch, as thus, Te are as tang in tuning 
your pipes as anither wad play a spring} You are 
as long in setting about a thing as another would be 
in doing it. 

There is a set of Scottish proverbs which we may- 
group together as containing one quality in common, 
and that in reference to the Evil Spirit, and to his 
agency in the world. This is a reference often, I 
fear, too lightly made ; but I am not conscious of 
anything deliberately profane or irreverent in the fol- 
lowing : — 

Ttoe deiPs nae sae ill as he's caaed. The most of 
people may be found to have some redeeming good 
point ; applied in " Guy Mannering " by the Deacon 
to Gilbert Glossin, upon his intimating his intention 
to come to his shop soon for the purpose of laying 
in his winter stock of groceries. 

To the same effect, Ii's a sin to lee on the deih 
Even of the worst people, truth at least should be 
spoken. 

He should hae a tang shafted spune that sups kail 
wP the deil. He should be well guarded and well 
protected that has to do with cunning and unprin- 
cipled men. 

Lang ere the deil dee by the dyke-side. Spoken 
I Tune. 



1 36 Rt'?niniscences of 

when the improbable death of some powerful and 
ill-disposed person is talked of. 

Lei ae cleil ding' anither. Spoken when two bad 
persons are at variance over some evil work. 

The deifs bairns hae deiTs luck. Spoken enviously 
when ill people prosper. 

The dciPs a busy bishop in his ain diocie. Bad men 
are sure to be active in promoting their own bad 
ends. A quaint proverb of this class I have been 
told of as coming from the reminiscences of an old 
Jady of quality, to recommend a courteous manner 
to every one : It's aye gude to be ceevil^ as the auld 
wife said when she beckit ^ to the deevil. 

Raise nae mair deils than ye are able to lay. Pro- 
voke no strifes which ye may be unable to appease. 

The deiVs aye gude to his ain. A malicious proverb, 
spoken as if those whom we disparage were deriving 
their success from bad causes. 

Te zvad do little for God an the deevil was dead. A 
sarcastic mode of telling a person that fear, rather than 
love or principle, is the motive to his good conduct. 

In the old collection already referred to, is a 
proverb which I quote unwillingly, and yet which I 
do not like to omit. It is doubtful against whom 
it took its origin, whether as a satire against the 
decanal order in general, or against some obnoxious 
dean in particular : The Deil an the Dean begin wi* 
ae letter. When the Deil has the Dean the kirk will 
he the better. 

1 Curtsied. 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 137 

The deiPs gane ower Jock Wahster^ is a saying 
which I have been accustomed to in my part of the 
country from early years. It expresses generally 
misfortune or confusion, but I am not quite sure of 
the exact meaning, or who is represented by Jock 
Wabster. It was a great favourite with Sir Walter 
Scott, who quotes it twice in " Rob Roy." Allan 
Ramsay introduces it in the " Gentle Shepherd " to 
express the misery of married life when the first 
dream of love has passed away : — 

" The ' Dell gaes ower Jock Wabster,' hame grows hell, 
When Pate misca's ye waur than tongue can tell." 

There are two very pithy Scottish proverbial ex- 
pressions fur describing the case of young women 
losing their chance of good marriages, by setting 
their aims too high. Thus an old lady, speaking 
of her grand-daughter having made what she con- 
sidered a poor match, described her as having 
"lookit at the moon, and lichtit ^ in the midden." 

It is recorded again of a celebrated beauty, Becky 
Monteith, that being asked how she had not made a 
good marriage, having replied, " Ye see, I wadna 
hae the walkers, and the riders gaed by." 

It's ill to wauken sleeping dogs. It is bad policy to 
rouse dangerous and mischievous people, who are for 
the present quiet. 

// is nae mair pity to see a woman greit nor to see a 
goose go barefit. A harsh and ungallant reference to 
1 Fell. 



1^8 Reminiscences of 

the facility with which the softer sex can avail them- 
selves of tears to carry a point. 

A Scots mist will weet an Englishman to the skin. 
A proverb evidently of Caledonian origin, arising 
from the frequent complaints made by English 
visitors of the heavy mists which hang about our 
hills, and which are found to annoy the southern 
traveller as it were downright rain. 

Keep your ain fish guts to your ain sea ?naws. This 
was a favourite proverb of Sir Walter Scott when 
he meant to express the policy of first considering 
the interests that are nearest home. The saying 
savours of the fishing population of the east coast. 

J Tule feast may be done at Pasch, Festivities, 
although usually practised at Christmas, need not, on 
suitable occasions, be confined to any season. 

It^s better to sup wi' a cutty than want a spune. 
Cutty means anything short, stumpy, and not of full 
growth ; frequently applied to a short-handled horn 
spoon. As Meg Merrilees says to the bewildered 
Dominie, " If ye dinna eat instantly, by the bread and 
salt, I'll put it down your throat wi' the cutty spune,'* 
" Fules mak feasts and wise men eat 'em^ my 
Lord." This was said to a Scottish nobleman on 
his giving a great entertainment, and who readily 
answered, " Ay, and Wise men make proverbs ana 
fools repeat Vw." 

A green Tule ^ and a white Pays ^ mak a fat kirk- 
yard. A very coarse proverb, but may express a 
1 Christmas. ^ Pasch or Easter. 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 139 

general truth as regards the effects of season on the 
human frame. Another of a similar character is, 
jin air ^ winter maks a sair^ winter. 

Wha will hell the cat ? The proverb is used in 
reference to a proposal for accomplishing a difficult 
or dangerous task, and alludes to the fable of the 
poor mice proposing to put a bell about the cat's 
neck, that they might be apprised of his coming. 
The historical application is well known. When 
the nobles of Scotland proposed to go in a body to 
Stirling to take Cochrane, the favourite of James the 
Third, and hang him, the Lord Gray asked, " It is 
well said, but wha will bell the cat ? " The Earl of 
Angus accepted the challenge, and effected the ob- 
ject. To his dying day he was called Archibald 
Bell-the-Cat. 

Te hae tint the tongue o* the trump. " Trump '* 
is a Jew's harp. To lose the tongue of it is to lose 
what is essential to its sound. 

Meat and mass hinders nae man. Needful food, 
and suitable religious exercises, should not be spared 
under greatest haste. 

Te fand it whar the highland man fand the tangs 
(i.e., at the fireside). A hit at our mountain neigh- 
bours, who occasionally took from the Lowlands — 
as having found — something that was never lost. 

His head will ne'er fill his father's bonnet. A pic- 
turesque way of expressing that the son will never 
equal the influence and ability of his sire. 
1 Early. 2 Severe. 



140 Reminiscences of 

His bark, is waur nor his bite. A good-natured 
apology for one who is good-hearted and rough in 
speech. 

Do as the cow of Forfar did^ tak a standing drink. 
This proverb relates to an occurrence which gave rise 
to a law-suit, and a whimsical legal decision. A 
woman in Forfar, who was brewing, set out her tub 
of beer to cool. A cow came by and drank it up. 
The owner of the cow was sued for compensation, 
but the bailies of Forfar, who tried the case, acquitted 
the owner of the cow on the ground that the fare- 
well drink, called in the Highlands the dochan doris^ 
or stirrup cup, taken by the guest standing at the 
door, was never charged, and as the cow had taken 
but a standing drink outside, it could not, according 
to Scottish usage, be chargeable. Sir Walter Scott 
has humorously alluded to this circumstance in the 
notes to " VVaverley," but has not mentioned it as 
the subject of an old Scotch proverb. 

Bannocks are better nor nae kind o* bread. Evident- 
ly Scottish. Better have oatmeal cakes to eat than 
be in want of wheaten loaves. 

Folly is a bonny dog. Meaning, I suppose, that 
many are imposed upon by the false appearances and 
attractions of vicious pleasures. 

The e'ening brings a' hanie^ is an interesting saying, 
meaning, that the evening of life, or the approach 

1 The proper orthography of this expression is deoch-an- 
doruis (or dorais). Deoch, a drink ; an, of the ; doruis or aO" 
ruisy possessive case of dorus or doras, a door. 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 141 

of death, softens many of our political and religious 
differences. I do not find this proverb in the older 
collections, but A4r. Stirling justly calls it "a beauti- 
ful proverb, v/hich, lending itself to various uses, 
may be taken as an expression of faith in the gradual 
growth and spread of large-hearted Christian charity, 
the noblest result of our happy freedom of thought 
and discussion." The literal idea of the " e'ening 
bringing a' hame," has a high and illustrious antiqui- 
ty, as in the fragment of Sappho, EaTrepc, rraira ^epeff — 
^Ipeig oiv (or olvov) cpepeig alya, <l)Epetg narlpi Tvcuda — which is 
thus paraphrased by Lord Byron in " Don Juan," iii. 
107 : — 

O Hesperus! thou bringest all good things — 
Home to the weary, to the hungry cheer ; 

To the young bird the parent's brooding wings. 
The welcome stall to the o'erlaboured steer ; etc. 

Thou bring'st the child, too, to the mother's breast. 

A similar graceful and moral saying inculcates an 
acknowledgment of gratitude for the past favours 
which we have enjoyed when we come to the close 
of the day or the close of life — 

Ruse ' the fair day at e''en. 

But a very learned and esteemed friend has suggested 
another reading of this proverb, in accordance with 
the celebrated saying of Solon (Arist. Eth. N. I. 10) : 
Karu 'L67Mva xp^^v rilog opuv — Do not praise the fairness 
of the day till evening ; do not call the life happy ti/I 
1 Praise. 



142 Reminiscences of 

you have seen the close ; or, in other matters, do not 
boast that all is well till you have conducted your un- 
dertaking to a prosperous end. 

Let him tak a spring on his ain fiddle. Spoken of 
a foolish and unreasonable person as if to say, " We 
will for the present allow him to have his own way.*' 
Bailie Nicol Jarvie quotes the proverb with great bit- 
terness, when he warns his opponent that his time 
for triumph will come ere long, — " Aweel, aweel, 
sir, you're welcome to a tune on your ain fiddle ; but 
see if I dinna gar ye dance till't afore it's dune." 

The kirk is meikle^ but ye may say mass in ae end o^t; 
or, as I have received it in another form, " If we 
canna preach in the kirk, we can sing mass in the 
quire." This intimates, where something is alleged 
to be too much, that you need take no more than 
what you have need for. I heard the proverb used 
in this sense by Sir Walter Scott at his own table. 
His son had complained of some quaighs which Sir 
Walter had produced for a dram after dinner, that 
they were too large. His answer was, '* Well, Wal- 
ter, as my good mother used to say, if the kirk is 
ower big, just sing mass in the quire." Here is 
another reference to kirk and quire — He rives'^ the 
kirk to theik ^ the quire. Spoken of unprofitable per- 
sons, who, in the English proverb, " rob Peter to 
p^y Paul." 

The king's errand may come the cadger'* 5 gate yet. 
A great man may need the service of a very mean one. 
1 Tears. 2 Thatch. 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 143 

The maut is aboon the meat. His liquor has done 
more for him than his meat. The man is drunic. 

Mak a kirk and a mitt o't. Turn a thing to any 
purpose you like ; or rather, spoken sarcastically, 
Take it, and make the best of it. 

Like a sow ptaying on a trump. No image could 
be well more incongruous than a pig perforniing on 
a Jew's harp. 

Mair by tuck than gude guiding. His success is 
due to his fortunate circumstances, rather than to 
his own discretion. 

H.e''s not a man to ride the water wi^ . A common 
Scottish saying to express you cannot trust such an 
one in trying times. May have arisen from the 
districts where fords abounded, .-ind the crossing 
them was dangerous. 

He rides on the riggin 0^ the kirk. The riggin 
being the top of the roof, the proverb used to be 
applied to those who carried their zeal for church 
matters to the extreme point. 

Leal heart never teed., well expresses that an honest 
loyal disposition will scorn, under all circumstances^ 
to tell a falsehood. 

A common Scottish proverb, Let that fiee stick to 
the w^', has an obvious meaning, — "Say nothing 
more on that subject." But the derivation is not 
obvious.-* In like manner, the meaning of He that 



1 It has been suggested, and with much reason, that the 
reference is to a flee sticking on a wet or a newly painted wall ; 



144 Reminiscences of 

will to Cupar maun to Cupa?-^ is clearly that if a man 
is obstinate, and bent upon his dangerous course, he 
must take it. But why Cupar ? and whether is it 
the Cupar of Angus or the Cupar of Fife ? 

Kindness creeps where it canna gang^ prettily ex- 
presses that where love can do little it will do that 
little though it cannot do more. 

In my part of the country a ridiculous addition 
used to be made to the common Scottish saying, 
Mony a things made for the pennie^ i. e., many con- 
trivances are thought of to get money. The addition 
is, "As the old woman said when she saw a black 
man," — taking it for granted that he was an in- 
genious and curious piece of mechanism made for 
profit. 

Bluid is thicker than water^ is a proverb which 
has a marked Scottish aspect, as meant to vindicate 
those family predilections to which, as a nation, we 
are supposed to be rather strongly inclined. 

There's aye water where the stlrkie^ drouns. 

Where certain effects are produced, there must be 

, some causes at work — a proverb used to shew that 

a universal popular suspicion as to an obvious effect 

must be laid in truth. 

Better a finger aff than aye waggin^. This 
proverb I remember as a great favourite with many 

this is corroborated by the addition in " Rob Roy," " When 
the dirt's dry, it will rub out," which seems to point out the 
meaning and derivation of the proverb. 
1 A young bullock. 



Scottish Life Sf Character. izj.r 

Scotch people. Better experience the worst, than 
have an evil always pending. 

Cadgers are aye cracking <?' crook-saddle^ s^ has a 
very Scottish aspect, and signifies that professional 
men are very apt to talk too much of their profes- 
sions. 

As sure^s deeth. A common Scottish proverbial 
expression to signify either the truth or certainty of 
a fact, or to pledge the speaker to a performance of 
his promise. In the latter sense an amusing illus- 
tration of faith in the superior obligation of this as- 
severation to any other, is recorded in the " Eglinton 
Papers." 2 The Earl one day found a boy climbing 
up a tree, and called him to come down. The boy 
declined, because, he said, the Earl would thrash 
him. His lordship pledged his honour that he 
would not do so. The boy repHed, " I dinna ken 
onything about your honour, but if ye say as sure's 
deeth, Pll come doun." 

Proverbs are sometimes local in their application. 
The men o' the Mearns manna do mair than they 
may. Even the men of Kincardineshire can only 
do their utmost — a proverb intended to be highly 
compHmentary to the powers of the men of that 
county. 

ril mak Cathkins covenant with you^ Let ahee for 

let ahee. This is a local saying quoted often in 

Hamilton. The laird of that property had — very 

unlike the excellent family who have now possessed 

1 Saddle for supporting panniers. 2 Vol. I., page 134. 

10 



1 46 Rem. n scene es of 

it for more than a century — been addicted to in- 
temperance. One of his neighbours, in order to 
frighten him on his way home from his evening 
potations, disguised himself in a very dark night, and 
personating the devil, claimed a title to carry him off 
as his rightful property. Contrary to all expecta- 
tion, however, the laird showed fight, and was about 
to commence the onslaught, when a parley was pro- 
posed, and the issue was " Cathkin's covenant. Let 
abee for let abee." 

IVhen the castle of Stirling gets a hat^ the carse of 
Corntown pays for that. This is a local proverbial 
saying ; the meaning is, that when the clouds 
descend so low as to envelope Stirling Castle, a 
deluge of rain may be expected in the adjacent 
country. 

I will conclude this notice of our proverbial rem- 
iniscences, by adding a cluster of Scottish proverbs, 
selected from an excellent article on the general sub- 
ject in the "North British Review" of February 
1858. The reviewer designates these as " broader in 
their mirth, and more caustic in their tone," than the 
moral proverbial expressions of the Spanish and 
Italian : — 

A Mate ' cat maks a proud mouse. 
Better a toom 2 house than an ill tenant, 
youk 3 and let the jauo * gang by. 
Mony ane speirs the gate ^ he kens fu* iveel. 

I Shy. 2 Empty. 3 Stoop down. 

* Wave. 5 The way. 



Scottish Life S^ Character. 147 

'The tod 1 ne'er sped better than ijohen he gaed his aln er- 
rand. 

A njoilfu' man should be unco 'wise. 

He that has a meikle nose thinks ilka ane speaks o^t. 

He that teaches hvnselhas a fule for his maister. 

It is an ill cause that the laixiyer thinks shame o\ 

Lippen 2 to me, but look to yoursell. 

Mair 'whistle than 'woo, as the s outer said ivhen shearing 
the soo. 

Ye gae far about seeking the nearest. 

Ye'' II no sell your hen in a rainy day. 

Ye"* II mend 'vohen ye gro'vo better. 

Ye^re nae chicken for a'' your cheepin"*? 

I have now adduced quite sufficient specimens to 
convince those M^ho may not have given attention to 
the subject, how much of wisdom, knowledge of 
life, and good feeh'ng, are contained in these apho- 
risms which compose the mass of our Scottish pro- 
verbial sayings. No doubt,"to many of my younger 
readers, proverbs are little known, and to all they are 
becoming more and more matters of reminiscence. 
I am quite convinced that much of the old quaint 
and characteristic Scottish talk which we are now 
endeavouring to recall, depended on a happy use of 
those abstracts of moral sentiment. And this feeling 
will be confirmed when we call to mind how often 
those of the old Scottish school of character, whose 
conversation we have ourselves admired, had most 
largely availed themselves of the use of its proverbial 
philosophy. 

1 Fox. 2 Trust to. 8 Chirping. 



CHAPTER V. 



On Scottish Stories of Wit and Humour. 




HE portion of our subject, which we pro- 
posed under the head of " Reminiscences 
of Scottish Stories of Wit or Humour,*' 
yet remains to be considered. This is 
closely connected with the question of Scottish dia- 
lect and expressions ; indeed, on some points hardly 
separable, as the wit, to a great extent, proceeds from 
the quaint and picturesque modes of expressing it. 
But here we are met ^y a difficulty. On high au- 
thority it has been declared that no such thing as wit 
exists among us. What has no existence can have 
no change. We cannot be said to have lost a qual- 
ity which we never possessed. Many of my readers 
are no doubt familiar with what Sidney Smith de- 
clared on this point, and certainly on the question of 
wit he must be considered an authority. He used to 
say (I am almost ashamed to repeat it), " It requires 
a surgical operation to get a joke well into a Scotch 
understanding. Their only idea of wit, which pre- 
vails occasionally in the north, and which, under the 
name of Wut, is so infinitely distressing to peo- 



Scottish Life Sf Character. ijq 

pie of good taste, is laughing immoderately at stated 
intervals." Strange language to use of a country 
which has produced Smollett, Burns, Scott, Gait, 
and Wilson, all remarkable for the humour diffused 
through their writings. Indeed, we may fairly ask, 
have they equals in this respect amongst English 
writers ? Charles Lamb had the same notion, or, I 
. should rather say, the same prejudice, about Scottish 
people not being accessible to wit ; and he tells a 
story of what happened to himself in corroboration 
of the opinion. He had been asked to a party, and 
one object of the invitation had been to meet a son 
of Burns. When he arrived, Mr. Burns had not 
made his appearance, and in the course of conversa- 
tion regarding the family of the poet, Lamb, in his 
lack-a-daisical kind of manner, said " I wish it had 
been the father instead of the son ; " upon which 
four Scotchmen present with one voice exclaimed, 
" That's' impossible, for his dead} Now, there will 
be dull men and matter-of-fact men everywhere who 
do not take a joke or enter into a jocular allusion ; 
but surely, as a general remark, this is far from being 
a natural quality of our country. Sydney Smith and 
Charles Lamb say so. But at the risk of being con- 
sidered presumptuous, I will say I think them entirely 

I After all, the remark may not have been so absurd then as 
it appears now. Burns had not been long dead, nor was he 
then so noted a character as he is now. The Scotchmen might 
really have supposed a Southrener unacquainted with the fact 
of the poet's death. 



150 Reminiscences of 

mistaken. I should say that there was, on ♦■he con- 
trary, a strong connection between the Scottish tem- 
perament, and, call it if you like, humour if it is 
not wit. And what is the difference ? My readers 
may not be afraid that they are to be led through a 
labyrinth of metaphysical distinctions between wit 
and humour. I have read Dr. Campbell's disserta- 
tion on the difference in his philosophy of rhetoric, I 
have read S. Smith's own two lectures, but I confess 
I am not much the wiser. Professors of rhetoric, 
no doubt, must have such discussions, but when you 
wish to be amused by the thing itself, it is somewhat 
disappointing to be presented with metaphysical analy- 
sis. It is like instituting an examination of the glass 
and cork of a champagne bottle, and a chemical test- 
ing of the wine. In the very process the volatile and 
sparkling draught which was to delight the palate, 
has become like ditch water, vapid and dead. What 
I mean is, that, call it wit or humour, or what you 
please, there is a school of Scottish pleasantry, amus- 
ing and characteristic beyond all other. Don't think 
of analysing its nature, or the qualities of which it is 
composed ; enjoy its quaint and amusing flow of odd- 
ity and fun \ as we may, for instance, suppose it to 
have flowed on that eventful night so joyously de- 
scribed by Burns : — 

" The souter tauld his queerest stories, 
The landlord's laugh was ready chorus." 

Or we may think of the delight it gave the good Mr. 
Balwhidder, when he tells, in his " Annals of the Par- 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 151 

ish," of some such story, that it was a "jocosity that 
was just a kittle to hear." When I speak of changes 
in Sich Scottish humour which have taken place, I 
refer to a particular sort of humour, and I speak of 
the sort of feelings that belongs to Scottish pleasant- 
ry, — which is sly, and cheery, and pawky. It is, 
undoubtedly, a humour that depends a good deal 
upon the vehicle in which the story is conveyed. If, 
as we have said, our quaint dialect is passing away, 
and our national eccentric points of character, we 
must expect to find much of the peculiar humour 
allied u^ith them to have passed away also. In other 
departments of wit and repartee, and acute hits at 
men and things, Scotchmen (whatever S. Smith may 
have said to the contrary) are equal to their neigh- 
bours, and, so far as I know, may have gained rather 
than lost. But this peculiar humour of which I now 
speak has not, in our day, the scope and develop- 
ment which were permitted to it by the former gen- 
eration. Where the tendency exists, the exercise 
of it is kept down by the usages and feelings of 
society. For examples of it (in its full force at any 
rate) we must go back to a race who are departed. 
One remark, however, has occurred to me in regard 
to the specimens we have of this kind of humour, 
viz., that they do not always proceed from the wit 
or the cleverness of any of the individuals concerned 
in them. The amusement comes from the circum- 
stances, from the concurrence or combination of the 
ideas, and in many cases from the mere expressions 



152 Reminiscences of 

which describe the facts. The humour of the nar- 
rative is unquestionable, and yet no one has tried to 
be humorous. In short, it is the Scottishness that 
gives the zest. The same ideas differently expound- 
ed might have no point at all. There is, for exam- 
ple, something highly original in the notions of 
celestial mechanics entertained by an honest Scottish 
Fife lass regarding the theory of comets. Having 
occasion to go out after dark, and having observed 
the brilliant comet then visible, (1858,) she ran in 
with breathless haste to the house, calling on her 
fellow-servants to " Come oot and see a new star 
that hasna got its tail cuttit aff yet ! " Exquisite 
astronomical speculation ! Stars, like puppies, are 
born with tails, and in due time have them docked. 
Take an example of a story where there is no dis- 
play of any one's wit or humour, and yet it is a good 
story, and one can't exactly say why : — An Eng- 
lish traveller had gone on a fine highland road so 
long, without having seen an indication of fellow- 
travellers, that he became astonished at the solitude 
of the country; and no doubt before the Highlands 
were so much frequented as they are in our time, 
the roads had a very striking aspect of solitariness. 
Our traveller at last coming up to an old man break- 
ing stones, he asked him if there was any traffic on 
this road — was it at all frequented ? " Ay," he 
said, " it's no ill at that ; there was a cadge, body 
yestreen, and there's yoursell the day." No English 
version of the story could have half such iimpse 



Scottish Life 8f Character, 153 

ment, or half so quaint a character. An answer, 
even still more characteristic, is recorded to have 
been given by a countryman to a traveller. Being 
doubtful of his way, he inquired if he were on the 
right road to Dunlceld. With some of his national 
inquisitiveness about strangers, the countryman asked 
his inquirer where he came from. Offended at the 
liberty, as he considered it, he sharply reminded the 
man that where he came from was nothing to him ; 
but all the answer he got, was the quiet rejoinder, 
" Indeed, it's just as little to me whar ye'r gaen'." 
A friend has told me of an answer highly character- 
istic of this dry and unconcerned quality which he 
heard given to a fellow-traveller. A gentleman 
sitting opposite to him in the stage-coach at Ber- 
wick, complained bitterly that the cushion on which 
he sat was quite wet. On looking up to the roof 
he saw a hole through which the rain descended 
copiously, and at once accounted for the mischief. 
He called for the coachman, and in great wrath re- 
proached him with the evil under which he suffered, 
and pointed to the hole which was the cause of it. 
All the satisfaction, however, that he got, was the 
quiet unmoved reply, " Ay, mony a ane has com- 
plained o' that hole." Another anecdote I heard 
from a gentleman who vouched for the truth, which 
is just a case where the narrative has its humour, 
not from the wit which is displayed, but from that 
dry matter-of-fact view of things peculiar to some 
of our countrvmen. The friend of my informant 



1^4 Reminiscences of 

was walking in a street of Perth, when, to his hor- 
ror, he saw a workman fall from a roof where he 
was mending slates, right upon the pavement. By 
extraordinary good fortune he was not killed, and, 
on the gentleman going up to his assistance, and 
exclaiming with much excitement, " God bless me, 
are you much hurt ? " all the answer he got was the 
cool rejoinder, " On the contrary, sir." A similar 
matter-of-fact answer was made by one of the old 
race of Montrose humorists. He was coming out 
of church, and in the press of the kirk skailing^ a 
young man thoughtlessly trod on the old gentleman's 
toe, which was tender with corns. He hastened to 
apologise, saying, " I am very sorry, sir ; I beg your 
pardon." 7"he only acknowledgment of which was 
the dry answer, " And ye've as muckle need, sir." 

From a first-rate Highland authority I have been 
supplied with the following clever and crushing reply 
to what was intended as a sarcastic compliment and 
a smart saying. 

About the beginning of the present century, the 
then Campbell, of Combie, on Loch Awe side, in 
Argyleshire, was a man of extraordinary character, 
and of great physical strength, and such swiftness 
of foot that it is said he could " catch the best tup 
on the hill." He also looked upon himself as a 
" pretty man," though in this he was singular ; also, 
it was more than whispered that the laird was not 
remarkable for his principles of honesty. 

There also lived in the same district a Miss 



Scottish Life 8^ Character. \^z^ 

MacNabb of Bar-a'-Chaistril, a lady who, before 
she had passed the zenith of life, had never been 
remarkable for her beauty — the contrary even had 
passed into a proverb, while she was in her teens ; 
but, to counterbalance this defect in external quali- 
ties, nature had endowed her with great benevolence, 
while she was renowned for her probity. One day 
the Laird of Combie, who piqued himself on his 
bon-motSy was, as frequently happened, a guest of 
Miss MacNabb's, and after dinner, several toasts 
had gone round as usual, Combie addressed his 
hostess, and requested an especial bumper, insisting 
on all the guests to fill to the brim. He then rose, 
and said, addressing himself to Miss MacNabb, " I 
propose the old Scottish toast of ' Honest men and 
honnie lassies,' " and, bowing to the hostess, he re- 
sumed his seat. The lady returned his bow with 
her usual amiable smile, and, taking up her glass, 
replied, " Weel, Combie, I am sure we may drink 
that, for it will neither apply to you nor me.'''' 

An amusing example of a quiet cool view of a pecu- 
niary transaction happened to my father whilst doing 
the business of the rent day. He was receiving sums 
of money from the tenants in succession. After look- 
ing over a bundle of notes which he had just received 
from one of them, a well-known character, he said 
in banter, " James, the notes are not correct.'* To 
which the farmer, who was much of a humorist, 
dryly answered, " I dinna ken what they may be noo ; 
but they were a* richt afore ye had your fingers in 



156 Reminiscences of 

aniang 'em." An English farmer would hardly have 
spoken thus to his landlord. The Duke of Buc- 
cleuch told me an answer very quaintly Scotch, given 
to his grandmother by a farmer of the old school. A 
dinner was given to some tenantry of the vast es- 
tates of the family, in the time of Duke Henry. 
His Duchess (the last descendant of the Dukes of 
Montague) always appeared at table on such occa- 
sion, and did the honours with that mixture of dig- 
nity and of affable kindness for which she was so re- 
markable. Abundant hospitality was shewn to all the 
guests. The Duchess having observed one of the 
tenants supplied with boiled beef from a noble round, 
proposed that he should add a supply of cabbage ; 
on his declining, the Duchess good humouredly re- 
marked, "Why, boiled beef and greens, seem so 
naturally to go together, I wonder you don't take it." 
To which the honest farmer objected, " Ay, but 
your Grace maun alloo its a vara windy vegetable," 
in delicate allusion to the flatulent quality of the 
esculent. Similar to this was the native answer 
of a farmer on the occasion of a rent day. The 
lady of the house asked him if he would take 
some rhubarb tart, " Mony thanks, mem, I dinna 
need it." 

Amongst the lower orders, humour is found, occa- 
sionally, very rich in mere children, and I recollect 
a remarkable illustration of this early native humoui 
occurring in a family in Forfarshire, where I used, 
in former days, to be very intimate. A wretched 



Scottish Life Sf Character. i_jy 

woman, who used to traverse the country as a beg- 
gar or tramp, left a poor, half starved little girl by 
the road side, near the house of my friends. Always 
ready to assist the unfortunate, they took charge of 
the child, and as she grew a little older, they began 
to give her some education, and taught her to read. 
She soon made some progress in reading the Bible, 
and the native odd humour, of which we speak, be- 
gan soon to shew itself. On reading the passage, 
which began, " Then David rose,*' etc., the child 
stopped, and looked up knowingly, to say, " I ken 
wha that was," and, on being asked what she could 
mean, she confidently said, " That's David Rowse 
the pleuchman." And again reading the passage 
where the words occur, " He took Paul's girdle," 
the child. said with much confidence, " I ken what 
he took that for," and on being asked to explain, 
replied at once, " To hake's bannocks on," " gir- 
dle " being, in the north, the name for the iron 
plate hung over the fire, for making oat cakes or 
bannocks. 

A kind correspondent has sent me, from personal 
knowledge, an admirable pendant to these stories of 
Scottish child acuteness and shrewd observation. 
A young lady friend of his, resident in a part of 
Ayrshire, rrther remote from any very satisfactory 
administration of the Gospel, is in the habit of col- 
lecting the children of the neighbourhood on Sun- 
days at the " big house," for religious instruction. 
On one occasion, the class had repeated the para- 



158 



Reminiscences of 



phrase of the Lord's Prayer, which contains these 
lines — 

*' Give us this day our daily bread, 
And raiment// provide." 

There being no question as to what " daily bread " 
was, the teacher proceeded to ask ; " What do you 
understand by ' raiment fit,' or, as we might say, ' fit 
raiment?'" For a short time the class remained 
puzzled at the question ; but at last one little girl 
sung out, " stockings and shunc." The child knew 
that " fit," was Scotch for feet, so her natural ex- 
planation of the phrase was equivalent to " feet rai- 
ment," or " stockings and shune," as she termed it. 
To a distinguished member of the Church of Scot- 
land I am indebted for an excellent story of quaint 
child humour, which he had from the lips of an old 
woman who related the story of herself — When a 
girl of eight years of age, she was taken by her 
grandmother to church. The parish minister was 
not only a long preacher, but, as the custom was, 
delivered two- sermons' on the Sabbath day without 
any interval, and thus saved the parishioners the 
two journeys to church. Elizabeth was sufficiently 
wearied before the close of the first discourse, but 
when, after singing and prayer, the good minister 
opened the Bible, read a second text, and prepared 
to give a second sermon, the young girl, being both 
tired and hungry, lost all patience, and cried out to 
her grandmother, to the no small amusement of those 
who were so near as to hear her, " Come awa, gran- 



Scottish Life 8f Character. 159 

ny, and gang hame -, this is a lang grace and nae 
meat." 

A most amusing account of child humour used 
to be narrated by an old Mr. Campbell of Jura, 
who told the story of his own son. It seems the 
boy was much spoilt by indulgence. In fact, the 
parents were scarce able to refuse him any thing he 
demanded. He was in the drawing-room on one 
occasion when dinner was announced, and on being 
ordered up to the nursery he insisted on going down 
to dinner with the company. His mother was for 
refusal, but the child persevered, and kept saying, 
" If I dinna gang, I'll tell thon." His father then, 
for peace sake, let him go. So he went and sat at 
table by his mother. When he found every one 
getting soup and himself omitted, he demanded soup, 
and repeated, " If I dinna get it, I'll tell thon." 
Well, soup was given, and various other things 
yielded to his importunities, to which he always 
added the usual threat of " telling thon." At last, 
when it came to wine, his mother stood firm, an<l 
positively refused, as " a bad thing for little boys," 
and so on. He then became more vociferous than 
ever about " telling thon ; " and as still he was re- 
fused, he declared, " now I will tell thon," and at 
last roared out, " Ma new breeks were made oot o* the 
auld curtains ! " 

A facetious and acute friend who rather leans to 
the S. Smith view of Scottish wit, declares that all 
our humorous stories are about lairds, and about 



i6o Reminiscences of 

lairds who are drunk. Of such stories there are 
certainly not a i^w. One of the best belonging to 
my part of the country, and to many persons I 
should perhaps apologise for introducing it at all. 
The story has been told of various parties and lo- 
calities, but no doubt the genuine laird was a laird 
of Balnamoon, (pronounced in the country Bonny- 
moon,) and that the locality was a wild tract of 
land, not far from his place, called Munrimmon 
Moor. Balnamoon had been dining out in the 
neighbourhood, where by mistake, they had put 
down to him after dinner cherry brandy, instead of 
port wine, his usual beverage. The rich flavour 
and strength so pleased him, that having tasted it, 
he would have nothing else. On rising from table, 
therefore, the laird would be more affected by his 
drink than if he had taken his ordinary allowance 
of port. His servant Harry, or Hairy,^ was to 
drive him home in a gig or whisky, as it was called, 
the usual open carriage of the time. On crossing 
the moor, however, whether from greater exposure 
to the blast, or from the laird's unsteadiness of head, 
his hat and wig came off and fell upon the ground. 
Harry got out to pick them up and restore them to 
liis master. The laird was satisfied with the hat, 
but demurred at the wig. " It's no my wig. Hairy, 

1 In corroDoration of the genuineness and authenticity of 
the story, I am assured by a correspondent that he knows the 
name of the servant was not Hairy ; but I have mislaid the 
reference. 



Scottish Life ^ Character. 16 1 

lad ; it*s no my wig," and refused to have anything 
to do with it. Hairy lost his patience, and anxious 
to get home, remonstrated with his master, " Ye'd 
better tak it, sir, for there's nae waile o' wigs on 
Munrimmon Moor." The humour of the argu- 
ment is exquisite, putting to the laird in his unrea- 
sonable objection, the sly insinuation that in such a 
locality, if he did not take tto'is wig, he was not 
likely to find another. Then, what a rich expres- 
sion, "waile o' wigs." In English what is it? 
" A choice of perukes," which is nothing compara- 
ble to the "waile o' wigs." I ought to mention 
also an amusing seqiiel to the story, viz., in what 
happened after the affair of the wig had been settled, 
and the laird had consented to return home. When 
the whisky drove up to the door, Hairy, sitting in 
front, told the servant who came to " tak out the 
laird." No laird was to be seen ; and it appeared 
that he had fallen out on the m.oor without Hairy 
observing it. Of course they went back, and, pick- 
ing him up, brought him safe home. A neighbour- 
ing laird having called a {qsm days after, and having 
referred to the accident, Balnamoon quietly added, 
"Indeed, I maun hae a lume^ that'll had In.'" 

The laird of Balnamoon was a truly eccentric 
character. He joined with his drinking propensities 
a great zeal for the Episcopal Church, the service of 
which he read to his own family with much solem- 
nity and earnestness of manner. Two gentlemen, 

1 A vessel. 
11 



i6'2 Reminiscences of 

one of them a stranger to the country, having called 
pretty early one Sunday morning, Balnamoon invited 
them to dinner, and as they accepted the invitation, 
they remained and joined in the forenoon devotional 
exercises conducted by Balnamoon himself. The 
stranger was much impressed with the laird's per- 
formance of the service, and during a walk which 
they took before dinner mentioned to his friend how 
highly he esteemed the religious deportment of their 
host. The gentleman said nothing, but smiled to 
himself at the scene which he anticipated was to 
follow. After dinner Balnamoon set himself, ac- 
cording to the custom of old hospitable Scottish 
hosts, to make his guests as drunk as possible. The 
result was, that the party spent the evening in a 
riotous debauch, and were carried to bed by the 
servants at a late hour. Next day, when they had 
taken leave and left the house, the gentleman who 
had introduced his friend asked him what he thought 
of their entertainer — " Why, really," he replied, 
with evident astonishment, " sic a speat o' praying, 
and sic a speat o' drinking, I never knew in the 
whole course of my life." 

The late Lady Dalhousie, mother, I mean, of the 
present distinguished Peer, used to tell a characteris- 
tic anecdote of her day. But here, on mention of the 
name Christian, Countess of Dalhousie, may I pause 
a moment to recall the memory of one who was a 
very remarkable person. She was, for many years, 
to me and mine, a sincere and true and valuable 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 163 

frienJ. i3y an awful dispensation of God's providence, 
she died instantaneously under my roof in 1839. 
Lady Dalhousie was eminently distinguished for a 
fund of the most varied knowledge, for a clear and 
powerful judgment, for acute observation, a kind 
heart, a brilliant wit. The story was thus : — A 
Scottish judge, somewhat in the predicament of the 
Laird of Balnamoon, had dined at Coalstoun with 
her father Charles Brown, an advocate, and son of 
George Brown, who sat in the Supreme Court as a 
judge with the title of Lord Coalstoun. The party 
had been convivial, as we know parties of the high- 
est legal characters often werQ in those days. When 
breaking up, and going to the drawing-room, one of 
them, not seeing his way very clearly, stepped out of 
the dining-room window, which was open to the sum- 
mer air. The ground at Coalstoun sloping off from 
the house behind, the worthy judge got a great fall, 
and rolled down the bank. He contrived, however, 
as tipsy men generally do, to regain his legs, and was 
aole to reach the drawing-room. The first remark 
he made was an innocent remonstrance with his 
friend the host, " Od, Charlie Brown, what gars 
ye hae sic lang steps to your front door»'' 

On Deeside, where many original stories had their 
origin, I recollect hearing several of an excellent and 
worthy, but very simple-minded man, the Laird of 
Craigmyle. On one occasion, when the beautiful 
and clever Jane, Duchess of Gordon, was scouring 
through the country, intent upon some of those elec- 



164 Reminiscences of 

tioneering schemes which often occupied her fertile 
imagination and active energies, she came to call at 
Craigmyle, and having heard that the laird was 
making bricks on the property, for the purpose 
of building a garden wall, with her usual tact 
she opened the subject, and kindly asked, *' Well 
Mr. Gordon, and how do your bricks come on ? *' 
Good Craigmyle's thoughts were much occupied 
with a new leather part of his dress, which he had 
had lately constructed, so, looking down on his 
nether garments, he said in pure Aberdeen dialect, 
" Muckle obleeged to yer Grace, the breeks war 
sum ticht at first, but they are deeing weel eneuch 
noo." The last laird of Macnab, before the clan 
finally broke up and emigrated to Canada, was a 
well-known character in the country, and being poor, 
used to ride about on a most wretched horse, which 
gave occasion to many jibes at his expense. The 
laird was in the constant habit of riding up from the 
country to attend the Musselburgh races. A young 
wit, by way of playing him off on the race course, 
asked him in a contemptuous tone, " Is that the same 
horse you had last year, Laird? " " Na," said the 
laird, brandishing his whip in the interrogator's face 
in so emphatic a manner as to preclude further ques- 
tioning, " Na ; but it's the same whup?' In those 
days, as might be expected, people were not nice in 
expressions of their dislike to persons or measures. 
If there be not more charity in society, there is 
certainly more courtesy. I have, from a friend, an 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 165 

anecdote illustrative of this remark, in regard to 
feelings exercised towards an unpopular laird. In 
the neighbourhood of BamfF, in Forfarshire, the seat 
of a very ancient family of the Ramsays, lived a 
proprietor who bore the appellation of Corb, from 
the name of his estate. The family has passed away 
and its property merged in BamfF. This laird was 
intensely disliked in the neighbourhood. Sir George 
Ramsay was, on the other hand, universally popular 
and respected. On one occasion. Sir George, in 
passing a morass in his own neighbourhood, had 
missed the road and fallen into a bo^r to an alarm- 
ing depth. To his great relief, he saw a passenger 
coming along the path, which was at no great dis- 
tance. He called loudly for his help, but the man 
took no notice. Poor Sir George felt himself sink- 
mg, and redoubled his cries for assistance ; all at 
once the passenger rushed forward, carefully extri- 
cated him from his perilous position, and politely 
apologised for his first neglect of his appeal, adding, 
as his reason, " Indeed, Sir George, I thought it was 
Corb ! " evidently meaning that had it been Corb, he 
must have taken his chance for him. 

In Lanarkshire, there lived a sma sma laird named 
Hamilton, who was noted for his eccentricity. On 
one occasion, a neighbour waited on him, and re- 
quested his name as an accommodation to a bit bill 
for twenty pounds at three months' date, which led 
to the following characteristic and truly Scottish col- 
loquy : — " Na, na, I canna do that." " What for 



i65 Rejniniscences of 

no, laird, ye hae dune the same thing for ithers." 
" Aye, aye, Tammas, but there's wheels within 
wheels ye ken naeihing about ; I canna do't." " It's 
a sma affair to refuse me, laird." " Weel, ye see, 
Tammas, if I was to pit my name till't, ye wad get 
the siller frae the bank, and when the time came 
round, ye wadna be ready, and I wad hae to pay't ; 
sae then you and me wad quarrel, sae we mae just 
as weel quarrel the noo, as lang's the siller's in ma 
pouch." On one occasion, Hamilton having busi- 
ness with the late Duke of Hamilton at Hamilton 
Palace, the Duke politely asked him to 1 mch. A 
liveried servant waited upon them, and was most 
assiduous in his attentions to the Duke and his 
guest. At last our eccentric friend lost patience, 
and looking at the servant, addressed him thus, 
" What the deil for are ye dance, dancing, about the 
room that gait j can ye no draw in your chair and 
sit down, I'm sure there's plenty on the table for 
three'' 

Of another laird whom I heard often spoken of 
in old times, an anecdote was told strongly Scotch. 
Our friend had much difficulty (as many worthy 
lairds have had) in meeting the claims of those two 
woful periods of the year called with us in Scotland 
the " tarmes." He had been employing for some 
time as workman a stranger from the south on some 
house repairs, of the not uncommon name in Eng- 
land of Christmas. His servant early one morning 
called out at the laird's door in great excitement that 



Scottish Life Sj- Character, 167 

" Christmas had run away, and nobody knew where 
he had gone." He turned in his bed with the earnest 
ejaculation, " I only wish he had taken Whitsunday 
and Martinmas along with him." I do not know a 
better illustration of quiet, shrewd, and acute Scot- 
tish humour than the following little story, which an 
esteemed correspondent mentions having heard from 
his father when a boy, relating to a former Duke of 
Athole, who had no family of his own^ and whom he 
mentions as having remembered very well: — He- 
met, one morning, one of his cottars or gardeners, 
whose wife he knew to be in the hopeful way ^ and, 
asking him *' How Marget was the day," the man 
replied, that she had that morning given him twins. 
Upon which the Duke said, — " Weel, Donald, ye 
ken the Almighty never sends bairns without the 
meat." " That may be, your Grace," said Donald j 
" but whiles I think that Providence maks a mistak 
in thae matters, and sends the bairns to ae hoose and 
the meat to anither I " The Duke took the hint, 
and sent him a cow with calf the following morning. 
I have heard of an amusing scene between a laird 
celebrated for his saving propensities, and a wander- 
ing sort of Edie Ochiltree, a well-known itinerant, 
who lived by his wits and what he could pick up in 
his rounds amongst the houses of lairds and farmers. 
One thrifty laird having seen him sit down near his 
own gate to examine the contents of his poke or 
wallet, conjectured that he had come from the house, 
and so "he drew near to see what he had carried off. 



i68 Reminiscences of 

As he was keenly investigating the mendicant's 
spoils, his quick eye detected some bones on which 
there remained more meat than should have been 
allowed to leave his kitchen. Accordingly he 
pounced upon the bones, and declared he had been 
robbed, and insisted on his returning to the house 
and giving back the spoil. The beggar was, how- 
ever, prepared for the attack, and sturdily defending 
his property, boldly asserting, " Na, na, laird, thae 
are no Todbrae banes ; thae are Inch-Byre banes, 
and nane o' your honour's," — meaning that he had 
received these bones at the house of a neighbour of 
a more liberal character. But the beggar's profes- 
sional discrimination between the bones of the two 
mansions, and his pertinacious defence of his own 
property, would have been most amusing to a by- 
stander. 

I have, however, a reverse story, in which the beg- 
gar is quietly silenced by the proprietor. A noble 
lord, some generations back, well known for his fru- 
gal habits, had just picked up a small copper coin in 
his own avenue, and had been observed by one of the 
itinerating mendicant race, who grudged the trans- 
fer of the piece into the peer's pocket, exclaimed, " O, 
gie't to me, my lord ; " to which the quiet answer 
was, ^' Na, na •, fin' a fardin for yersell, puir body." 

There are always pointed anecdotes against houses 
wanting in a liberal and hospitable expenditure in 
Scotland. Thus, we have heard of a master leaving 
such a mansion, and taxing his servant with being 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 169 

drunk, which he had too often been after country 
visits. On this occasion, however, he was innocent 
of the charge, for he had not had the opportunity to 
tran;igress. So,, when his master asserted, " Jemmy, 
vou are drunk ! " Jemmy very quietly answered, " In- 
deed, sir, I wish I wur." At another mansion, no- 
torious for scanty fare, a gentleman was inquiring of 
the gardener about a dog; which some time ao;o he 
had given to the laird. The gardener shewed him a 
lank greyhound, on which the gentleman said, — 
" No, no ; the dog I gave your master was a mastiff, 
not a greyhound ; " to which the gardener quietly 
answered, " Indeed, ony dog micht sune become a 
greyhound by stopping here." 

From a friend and near relative, a minister of the 
Established Church of Scotland, I used to hear many 
characteristic stories. He had a curious vein of this 
sort of humour in himself, besides what he brought 
out of others. One of his peculiarities was a mortal 
antipathy to the whole French nation, whom he fre- 
quently abused in no measured terms. At the same 
time he had great relish of a glass of claret, which 
he considered the prince of all social beverages. So 
he usually finished off his anti-gallican tirades with 
the reservation, " But the bodies brew the braw 
drink.'* He lived amongst his own people, and 
knew well the habits and peculiarities of a race gone 
by. He had many stories connected with the pas- 
toral relation between minister and people, and all 
such stories are curious, not merely for their amuse- 



lyo Rt'?ni?ihcences of 

meiy:, but from the illustration they afFord us of that 
peculiar Scottish humour which we are now describ- 
ing. He had himself, when a very young boy, 
before he came up to the Edinburgh High School, 
been at the parochial school where he resided, and 
which, like many others at that period, had a con- 
siderable reputation for the skill and scholarship of 
the master. He used to describe school scenes 
rather different, I suspect, from school scenes in our 
day. One boy, on coming late, exclaimed that the 
cause had been a regular pitched battle between his 
parents, with the details of which he amused his 
school-fellows, and he described the battle in vivid 
and Scottish Homeric terms, " And eh, as they 
faucht and they faucht,'* adding, however, with 
much complacency, " but my minnie dang, she did 
tho'." 

There- was a style of conversation and quaint 
modes of communication between ministers and 
their people at that time, which, I suppose, would 
seem strange to the present generation ; as, for ex- 
ample; I recollect a conversation between this rela- 
tive and one of his parishioners of this description. 
It had been a very wet and unpromising autumn. 
The minister met a certain Janet of his flock, and 
accosted her very kindly. He remarked, "Bad 
prospect for the har'st (harvest), Janet, this wet," 
Janet — "Indeed, sir, Pve seen as muckle as that 
there'll be nae har'st the year." Minister — " Na, 
Janet, deil as muckle as that't ever ye Faw." 



Scottish Life 8f Character, 171 

As I have said, he was a clergyman of the 
Established Church, and had many stories about 
ministers and people, arising out of his own pastoral 
experience, or the experience of friends and neigh- 
bours. He was much delighted with the not very 
refined rebuke which one of his own farmers had 
given to a young minister who had for some Sundays 
occupied his pulpit. The young man dined with 
the farmer in the afternoon when services were 
over, and his appetite was so sharp, that he thought 
it necessary to apologise to his host for eating so 
substantial a dinner — "You see," he said, "J am 
always very hungry after preaching." The old gen- 
tleman, not much admiring the youth's pulpit minis- 
trations, having heard this apology two or three 
times, at last replied sarcastically, " Indeed, sir, I'm 
no surprised at it, considering the trash that comes 
afF your stamach in the morning." There was a 
story for which he had names of place and persons, 
but I forget whether it was of his own experience. 
I think it was his own ; at any rate it was thus : — 
A lad had come for examination; previous to his 
receiving his first communion. The pastor, know- 
ing that his young friend was not very profound in 
his theology, and not wishing to discourage him, or 
keep him from the table unless compelled to do so, 
began by asking what he thought a safe question, 
and what would give him confidence. So he took 
the old Testament, and asked him, in reference to 
the Mosaic law, how many commandments there 



172 Reminiscences of 

were. After a little thought he put his answer in 
the modest form of a supposition, and replied, 
cautiously, "Aiblins^ a hunner." The clergyman 
was vexed, and told him such ignorance was in- 
tolerable, that he could not proceed in examination, 
and that the youth must wait and learn more ; so 
he went away. On returning home he met a friend 
on his way to the manse, and, on learning that he, 
too, was going to the minister for examination, 
shrewdly asked him, " Weel, what will ye say noo 
if the minister speers hoo mony commandments there 
are?" "Say! v/hy, I shall say ten to be sure." 
To which the other rejoined, with great triumph, 
" Ten I Try ye him wi' ten ! I tried him wi' a 
hunner, and he wasna satisfeed." 

1 have received from Miss Stirling Graham of 
Duntrune a kind contribution to the present volume. 
I have deemed it best to put her communications 
together, and I introduce them here. They contain 
an account of an extraordinary Scottish superstition, 
and of an equally extraordinary mode of acting under 
its influence. TJiey describe two remarkable Scot- 
tish characters, and contain some Forfarshire tradi- 
tional sayings. Those who have read a vblume 
lately printed for circulation amongst her friends, 
containing an account of some of those " Mystifi- 
cations " with which she charmed the Edinburgh 
society of her early days, will know how exquisite 
is Miss Stirling Graham's appreciation of Scottish 
1 Perhaps. 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 173 

humour, and how complete her knowledge of 
Scottish character. 

There lived here in Gayfield Square two charming 
old maiden ladies — Mrs. Mary Smith and Miss Peg- 
gy Fyffe. They had a pet superstition, for which 
they paid, between them, threepence a week to a 
street porter, that he might be the first to tell them 
it was Monday, deeming it unlucky to hear the day 
first mentioned by a woman. They laid each three- 
halfpence on the hall table on Sunday night, and 
early next morning the man called to wish them a 
happy Monday, and pick up his reward. Once when 
Miss ¥y^Q was confined to bed, her attendant in- 
quired what she would like for dinner, for it was 
Monday^ and there would be no fish to be got. 
" VVae worth you," Miss Fyffe exclaimed, "do ye 
no ken that I pay a man to tell me it's Monday ? " 
When Miss Fyffe died, Mrs. Smith refused to pay 
any more than her weekly dole of three-halfpence. 
Miss Douglass of Brigton being present, the maid 
whispered, '' Never mind, Pll just pay it out of the 
house- money ! " When Miss Douglass returned 
home, she related this strange superstition to a party 
of friends, who enjoyed it as a jt)ke ; but her sister, 
Mrs. Hunter, looked rather serious, saying, " Well, 
I am not the least superstitious, but I do not like to 
be told by a woman it is Monday ! '* 

Mrs. Graham of Balmure had a faithful old ser- 
vant called Saunders Hay, who had a ready word on 
every subject. Hearing Miss Graham appeal to her 



174 Reminiscences of 

sister, if she did not think her gown rather too long, 
might it not be as well to have it shortened ? *' Na, 
na," quoth Saunders ; " it's very well ; clip nor pare 
ony mare at it." One Sunday evening Saunders and 
his wife had a serious quarrel. Jean said she thought 
David (King David) hadna taen much pains when 
he metred the Psalms ; on which Saunders flew in a 
passion at her ignorance, and reminded her that it 
was George Buchanan who metred the Psalms. 

Mr. Taylor, well known in London as having the 
management of the opera-house, had his father up 
from Aberdeen to visit him, and see the wonders of 
the city. When the old man returned home, his 
friends, anxious to know the impressions produced 
on his mind by scenes and characters so different 
from what he had been accustomed to at home, 
inquired what sort of business his son carried on ? 
'' Ou,'* said he (in reference to the operatic singers 
and the corps de ballet), " He just keeps a curn ^ o' 
quainies^ and a wheen widdyfous,^ and gars them 
fissle,* and loup, and mak murgeons^ to please the 
great fowk." 

An Aberdonian of the name of Bannerman (pos- 
sibly a cousin of mine own), of a matter-of-fact dis- 
position, when some one remarked," It's a fine day,'* 
dryly responded, " Fa's findin' faut wi' the day ? — 
ye wad pick a quarrel wi' a steen wa'." 

Another Aberdonian, describing the dress of a 

I A number. 2 Young girls. ^ Gallows birds. 

* Make whistling noises. 5 Distorted gestures 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 175 

lady whom he had seen at a ball the night before, 
said, " She had a tappie-towrie on her head, and a 
diamond necklace on her neck ; and she had stockings 
and shoon, for 1 saw them^ but for onything mair I 
dinna ken." 

Mrs. Matthew, who farmed Westhall some twenty 
years ago, was an original homely person. Her 
maiden name was Anderson, the descendant of a 
race of sensible well-to-do-people. On inquiring if 
she was connected with the provost of Dundee, she 
replied, with a look of great contempt, " Na, na, 
his father cam out o' P'organ. He was wont to 
ca' my father the man Anderson^ but, my certie, he 
wasna fit to be linings to the man Anderson, Our 
land is very dear, and so greedy for muck, deil burst 
it ; and my grieve is a souple, double, seceder rascal." 
As a set off to this account, a farmer, close to Edin- 
burgh, observed to Mr. R. Chambers, " The land 
oot here is noo quite tired o' police dung." 

A farmer in Strathmore being invited to dine at 
Belmont, had the precaution to ask the butler if there 
was any particular ceremony to be observed at table, 
and was told there was only one thing his lord and 
lady disliked, and that was the drinking of healths. 
The good man determined to be on his good be- 
haviour ; so, when raising the wine to his lips, he 
called out, " Here's to a' the company's gude health, 
except my Lord Privy Seal and Lady Betty Macken- 
zie. 

Mr. Miller of Ballumbie had occasion to find fault 



1.76 Reminiscences of 

with one of his labourers who had been improvident, 
and known better days. He was digging a drain, 
and he told him if he did not make better work he 
should turn him off". The man was very angry, and 
throwing down his spade, called out in a tone of re- 
sentment, " Ye are ower pridefu', Davie Miller j 
since I mind ye i' the warld when ye had neither 
cow nor ewe." " Very well," replied Mr. Miller 
mildly, " I remember you when you had both." 

A neighbour called one day upon Lord Dunsin- 
nan when he was spending his law-holidays on his 
estate in Strathnnre. The dinner consisted of broth 
and two boiled fowls. Just as they were sitting 
down to table another neighbour walked in, and 
another boiled fowl was placed before hiin ; and 
after some excellent claret, and pleasant discourse, 
the visitors mounted their horses to ride home, 
pondering by the way, over the singularity of the 
dinner, and wondering what the servants got ; they 
had the curiosity to ask them, to which they replied, 
'' Ilka ane had a hen boiled in broth." 

The late Lord Airlie remarking to one of his 
tenants that it was a very wet season, " Indeed, my 
lord," replied the man, " I think the spiggot's oot 
a'thegither." 

A countryman, from the Braes of Angus, came 
to tell the minister that his wife was brought to bed, 
and they wished him to christen the bairn. The 
minister, very pompous, inquired whether the child 
was male or female ? " It's neither, sir," was the 



Scottish Life Sf Character. i 



// 



answer. " Then, in the name of goodness," said 
the reverend man, " what is it ? " " Ou, it's juist 
a bit queanie ! " 

An old beggar woman was a frequent visitor at 
Duntrune. She was called Bobbins, a nickname 
which she did not particularly like, as it had ref- 
erence to somie intromissions with her neighbours' 
yarn. She was seized with a cold, and confined to 
bed. The neighbours sent donations of various 
delicacies, one of them a jar of black-currant jam, 
which she emptied into a wooden dish, and ate it 
all up with a large horn spoon, making wry faces all 
the time, and took credit to herself for the same, 
by remarking, " That mony ane wadna sup it, for 
the leddy maks her jeil wi' the cafr (cliaff) amang't." 
Then she drank six bottles of beer and half a bot- 
tle of whisky, and fell asleep for eight-and-forty 
hours, at the end of which time she awoke quite 
recovered ! 

An old cadger, the personification of content- 
ment, used to sit sound asleep on his cart, trusting 
himself and his fish to the discretion of the horse. 
One day he arrived at Duntrune nearly frozen to 
death, and was carried into the kitchen to be thawed. 
In due time he got something to eat, and a glass of 
warm toddy to drink, which so cheered his heart, 
that he exclaimed, " Oh ! sirs, I am happy wi' ye. 
1 am just ae eild wi' the auld king (George III.), 
and I daur say I'm as happy a man as he is. The 
leddy will -be takin' a glass to hersell when she comes 
12 



1/8 Reinmiscences of 

ill frae her walk, for I am sure naebody could hae it 
in the hoose and no talc it." 

The two following cases furnish specimens of the 
old Scottish domestics : — I'here was a waggish old 
man cook at Duntrune for sixty years, and during 
three generations of its owners. In 1745-6, when 
his master was skulking, John found it necessary to 
take another service, and hired himself to Mr. Wed- 
derburn of Pearsie ; but he wearied to get back to 
Duntrune. One day the Laird of Pearsie observed 
him putting a spit through a peat — it may have 
been for the purpose of cleaning it — be that as it 
may, the laird inquired the reason for so doing, and 
John replied, " Indeed, sir, I am just gaein to roast 
a peat, for fear I forget my trade." At the end of 
two years he returned to Duntrune, where he con- 
tinued to exercise his calling till near the close of 
hfe. 

One day he sent up a roast goose for dinner 
which he or some one had despoiled of a leg before 
it came to table j on which his master summoned 
him from the kitchen to inquire who had taken the 
leg off the goose. John replied that all the geese 
here had but ae leg. in corroboration of his asser- 
tion, he pointed to a whole flock before the window, 
who were, happily, sitting asleep on one leg, with 
a sentinel on the watch. The laird clapped his 
hands and cried whew^ on which they got upon 
both legs, and flew off. But John, no way dis- 
comfited, told his master, if he had cried whew to 



Scoltish Life <\ Character, ijg 

the one on the table, it would most likely have done 
the same. It is not to be believed that John had 
ever read Boccaccio, or that he ever heard of the 
Venetian cook, Chichibio, who played the same 
trick with the crane's leg ; but it is possible that 
two artists in the same vocation, even with four 
centuries rolling between them, may have originated 
similar ideas — therefore we may safely give John 
Fraser credit for his invention. He died in Dundee, 
where his master paid the last tribute of respect to 
his memory, and laid his head in the grave beside 
the family he had served so faithfully. 

When the funeral moved from his house, the 
widow, in the exuberance of gratification, called 
aloud to her neighbours to come and see the " beau- 
tiful burial." 

There lived in Arbroath a very remarkable old 
woman named Meg Matthew, a generous, noble, 
and disinterested character, and her conduct to the 
friendless and the orphans should be recorded. She 
had been a servant to Mr. Cruickshank, the minister 
of Kinnel. The minister and his wife both died 
during her service, and left three children totally 
unprovided. Upon which Meg engaged an attic 
room in the Market-gate of Arbroath, and carried 
the two boys and the little girl with her, where she 
span to maintain them, and she begged from those 
whom she thought could afford it, their schooling 
and clothing. She did not ask like a mendicant, 
but said she must have such and such things for her 



l8o Reminiscences of 

bairns ; and when the boys were to be fitted out, 
she would call at various places, and tell the lady 
of the house that she must have linen, and that the 
young ladies must set to work, and make so many 
shirts for Jamie or Willy. 

Situations were procured for the boys ; one went 
to the West Indies, the other to Montreal, where 
he married and had a family, whom he left in good 
circumstances. 

In the course of years, the other returned with a 
competency, and died in Arbroath. 

Meg herself accompanied the boys to London to 
witness their departure, and she saw the king (George 
III.), whom she described as being "juist like ony 
ither husbandman wi' a stand o' blue claes." 

Betsy Cruickshank obtained a lady's-maid's place 
in Hopetoun House, where she remained till her 
marriage with Mr. Haldane, a stocking manufac- 
turer in Haddington. He left her a widow in com- 
fort, and she was much respected, and died in a good 
old age. Meg was the theme of many conversa- 
tions between the young ladies of Hopetoun and 
their attendant. Her name and fame were even 
well known among the servants. 

One day a housemaid ran into the room calling 
out, " Miss Cruickshank, if your Meg be in the 
body, she is now coming up the road." 

It was Meg herself, arrived on foot from Ar- 
broath ; and rapturously she was welcomed by the 
whole family. She would remain only a short time, 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 18 1 

declining all favours for herself j and when they 
offered to shew her through the house, she replied, 
" Na, na, I'm no gaen to big the marrow of it."^ 

She returned home to her spinning-wheel in her 
solitary little room, and from her homely wrinkled 
face and rather unsocial manner, she was looked 
upon by coarse-minded people in the light of a witch, 
or one that was in compact with the devil. Her 
dress was a short gown over a woollen petticoat, a 
striped wincey apron, and a close white mutch with a 
black hood over it. She span a coarse yarn from 
the waist with both hands. 1 remember her in her 
last illness, her death, and seeing her laid in her 
coffin; and now, looking through the long vista of 
the present century, and far down into the past, I 
venerate the singularly beautiful character of that 
dear old woman, and noble Scottish heart. 

Her dust lies within the cemetery of the old ab- 
bey of Arbroath, — 

" Embalmed in memory with things that are holy, 
By the spirit that is undying." 

About this time Arbroath embraced a very primi- 
tive society. 

The players visited it once a year for a few 
weeks, and acted in the hay-loft of the inn. 

A very good set they were ; stars sometimes from 
the metropolis, with grand names, such as Wil- 
loughby and Mandeville. 

1 To build the equal of it. 



1 82 Reminiscences of 

Old ladies would take their knitting, and one 
more eccentric than the others, would carry her 
muslin caps wet with starch, to prepare them for 
being ironed, or as she said, " to make them ready 
to \iQ goosed ;''' and she clapped them between the 
palms of her hands when cheering the performers. 

An Episcopal clergyman married the widow of a 
blind gentleman, who fitted herself out with such a 
trousseau as made people wonder^ for she said, " I 
was married to a moudiewart last, but now I am get- 
ting a husband who can see me." 

Some people not very scrupulous, put bad coppers 
into the plate at the chapel door on Sundays, with 
which the good lady paid her losses at cards during 
the week, and so, in the end, it came to be known 
through whose veins the /// bawbees circulated. 

At one of her parties she remarked that she had 
never been able to procure any good gin since the 
Dutch took Flushing. " Wilie, wifie," interposed 
the minister, " Flushing is in Holland." " Weel," 
she replied, " I'm sure 1 dinna care whether it be in 
France or Ireland ! ! ! " 



We find in the conversation of old people frequent 
mention of parochial functionaries, now either be- 
come commonplace, like the rest of the world, or 
removed altogether, and shut up in poor-houses or 
mad-houses — I mean parish idiots — eccentric, or 
somewhat crazy, useless, idle creatures, who used to 



Scottish Life ^ Character, 183 

wander from house to house, and sometimes made 
very shrewd, sarcastic remarks upon what was going 
on in the parish. They used to take great liberty of 
speech regarding the conduct and disposition of those 
with whom they came in contact ; and many odd 
sayings which emanated from the parish idiots, were 
traditionary in country locaHties. I have a kindly 
feeling towards these imperfectly intelligent, but of- 
ten perfectly cunning beings ; partly I believe from 
recollections of early associations in boyish days, 
with some of those Davy Gellatleys. I have there- 
fore preserved several anecdotes with which I have 
been favoured, where their odd sayings and indica- 
tions of a degree of mental activity have been re- 
corded. Parish idiots seem to have had a partiality 
for getting near the pulpit in church, and their pres- 
ence there was accordingly sometimes annoying to 
the preacher and the congregation ; as at Maybole, 
when Dr. Paul, now of St. Cuthbert's, was minister 
in 1823, the idiot John McLymont had been in the 
habit of standuig so close to the pulpit door as to 
overlook the Bible and pulpit board. When required, 
however, by the clergyman, to keep at a greater dis- 
tance, and not look in upon the minister^ he got in- 
tensely angry and violent. He threatened the min- 
ister, " Sir, baeeby (maybe) I'll come further ; " 
meaning to intimate that perhaps he would, if much 
provoked, come into the pulpit altogether. This, in- 
deed, actually took place on another occasion, and 
the tenure of the ministerial position was justified by 



184 Reminiscences of 

an argument of a most amusing nature. The cir- 
cumstance, I am assured, happened in a parish of the 
north. The clergyman, on coming into church, 
found the pulpit occupied by the parish idiot. The 
authorities had been unable to remove him without 
more violence than was seemly, and therefore waited 
for the minister to dispossess Tarn of the place 
he had assumed. " Come down, sir, immediately," 
was the peremptory and indignant call \ and on Tam 
being unmoved, it was repeated with still greater 
energy. Tam, however, replied, looking down con- 
fidentially from his elevation, " Na, na, minister ! 
juist ye come up wi' me. This is a perverse gener- 
ation, and faith they need us baith." It is curious 
to mark the sort of glimmering of sense, and even 
of discriminating thought displayed by persons of 
this class \ as an example, take a conversation held 
by this same idiot, John McLymont, with Dr. Paul, 
whom he met some time after. He seemed to have 
recovered his good humour, as he stopped him, and 
said, " Sir, I would like to speer a question at ye 
on a subject that's troubling me." " Well, Johnie, 
what is the question ? " To which he replied, " Sir, 
is it lawful at ony time to tell a lee ? " The minis- 
ter desired to know what Johnie himself thought 
upon the point. " Weel, sir," said he, '' I'll no say 
but in every case it's wrang to tell a lee j but," added 
he, looking archly and giving a knowing wink, " I 
think there are waur lees than ithers.^' " How, 
Johnie ? " and then he instantly replied with all the 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 185 

simplicity of a fool, " to keep clown a din for instance. 
I'll no say but a man does wrang in telling a lee to 
keep down a din, but I'm sure he does not do half 
sae muckle wrang as a man who tells a lee to kick 
up a deevilment o' a din." This opened a question 
not likely to occur to such a mind. Mr. Asher, min- 
ister of Inveraven in Morayshire, narrated to Dr. 
Paul a curious example of want of intelligence com- 
bined with a power of cunning to redress a fancied 
wrong, shewn by a poor natural of the parish, who 
had been seized with a violent inflammatory attack, 
and was in great danger. The medical attendant saw 
it necessary to bleed him, but he resisted, and would 
not submit to it. At last the case became so hope- 
less that they were obliged to use force, and, holding 
his hands and feet, the doctor opened a vein and drew 
blood, upon which the poor creature, struggling vio- 
lently, baw^led out, " O doctor, doctor ! you'll kill 
me ! you'll kill me ! and depend upon it, the first 
thing I'll do when I get to the other world will be to 
report you to the Board of Supervision there^ and get 
you dismissed.'" A most extraordinary sensation was 
once produced on a congregation by Rab Hamilton, 
a well-remembered idiot of the west country, on the 
occasion of his attendance at the parish kirk of 
" Auld Ayr, wham ne'er a toun surpasses." Miss 
Kirkwood, Bothwell, relates the story from the recol- 
lection of her aunt, who was present. Rab had put 
his head between some iron rails, the first intimation 
of which to the congregation was a stentorian voice 



l86 Reminiscences of 

crying out, " Murder ! my head 'II hae to be cutit afF! 
Holy minister ! congregation ! O my head maun be 
cutit afF. It's a judgment for leaving my godlie Mr. 
Peebles at the Newton." After he had been extri- 
cated and quieted, when asked, why he put his head 
there ? he said, " It was jeest to look on ^ wi' anither 
woman. ''^ 

The pathetic complaint of one of this class, re- 
siding at a farm-house, has often been narrated, and 
forms a good illustration of idiot life and feelings. 
He was living in the greatest comfort, and every 
want provided. But, like the rest of mankind, he 
had his own trials, and his own cause for anxiety 
and annoyance. In this poor fellow's case it was 
the great turkey-cock at the farm, of whom he stood 
so terribly in awe, that he was afraid to come within 
a great distance of his enemy. Some of his friends 
coming to visit him, reminded him how comfortable 
he was, and how grateful he ought to be for the 
great care taken of him \ he admitted the truth of 
the remark generally, but still, like the rest of the 
world, he had to lament over an evil vi^hich sadly 
beset his path in life. There was a secret grievance 
which embittered his lot ; and to his friend he thus 
opened his heart: — " Ae, ae, but oh, I'm sare 
hadden doun wi' the bubbly jock." ^ 

I have received two anecdotes illustrative both 
of the occasional acuteness of mind, and of the 

1 Read from the same book. 

2 Sorely kept under by the turkey cock. 



Siottish Life Sf Character, 187 

sensitiveness of feeling occasionally indicated by 
persons thus situated. A well-known idiot, Jamie 
Fraser, belonging to the parish of Lunan, in Forfar- 
shire, quite surprised people sometimes by his replies. 
The congregation of his parish church had for some 
time distressed the minister by their habit of sleep- 
ing in church. He had often endeavoured to im- 
press them with a sense of the impropriety of such 
conduct, and one day when Jamie was sitting in the 
front gallery wide awake, when many were slum- 
bering round him, the clergyman endeavoured to 
awaken the attention of his hearers by stating the 
fact, saying, " You see even Jamie Fraser, the idiot, 
does not fall asleep, as so many of you are doing.'* 
Jamie not liking, perhaps, to be thus designated, 
coolly replied, " An' I hadna been an idiot, 1 wad 
ha' been sleeping too." Another of these imbeciles, 
belonging to Peebles, had been sitting at church for 
some time listening attentively to a strong repre- 
sentation from the pulpit of the guilt of deceit and 
falsehood in Christian characters. He was observed 
to turn red, and grow very uneasy, until at last, as if 
wincing under the supposed attack upon himself 
personally, he roared out, '* Indeed, minister, there's 
mair leears in Peebles than me." As examples of 
idiots possessing much of the dry humour of their 
more sane countrymen, and of their facility to utter 
sly and ready-witted sayings, I have received the 
two following from Mr. W. Chambers : — Daft 
Jock Gray, the supposed original of Davie Gel- 



l88 Rjjniniscences of 

latley, was one day assailed by the minister of a 
south-country parish on the subject of his idleness. 
'' John," said the minister rather pompously, '^ you 
are a very idle fellow ; you might surely herd a itw 
cows." " Me bird ! " replied Jock, " I dinna ken 
corn frae gerse." 

In the memorials of the "Montgomeries, Earls of 
Eglinton," vol. i. p. 134, occurs an anecdote of an 
idiot illustrative of the peculiar acuteness and quaint 
humour which occasionally mark the sayings of the 
class. There was a certain " Daft Will Speir," 
Vf\\o was a privileged haunter of Eglinton Castle 
and grounds. He was discovered by the Earl one 
day taking a near cut, and crossing a fence in the 
demesne. The Earl called out, " Come back, sir, 
that's not the road." " Do ye ken," said Will, 
" whaur I'm gaun ? " "No," replied his lordship. 
" Weel, boo the deil do ye ken whether this be the 
road or no ? " 

In Peebles there was a crazy being of this kind 
called " Daft Yedie." On one occasion he saw a 
gentleman, a stranger in the town, who had a club 
foot. Yedie contemplated this phenomenon with 
some interest, and addressing the gentleman, said 
compassionately, "It's a great pity — it spoils the 
boot." There is a story of one of those half-witted 
creatures of a different character from the humor- 
ous ones already recorded ; I think it is exceedingly 
affecting, and with it I will conclude my collection. 
The story is traditionary in a country district, and I 



Scottish Life Sf Character. i8c^ 

am not aware of its being ever printed. A poor 
boy, of this class, who had evidently manifested a 
tendency towards rehgious and devotional feelings, 
asked permission from the clergyman to attend the 
Lord's Table and partake of the holy comm.union 
with the other members of the congregation (wheth- 
er Episcopalian or Presbyterian I do not know). 
The clergyman demurred for some time, under the 
impression of his mind being incapable of a right 
and due understanding of the sacred ordinance. 
But observing the extreme earnestness of the poor 
boy, at last gave consent, and he was allowed to 
come. He was much affected, and all the way 
home was heard to exclaim, " Oh ! I hae seen the 
pretty man." This referred to his seeing the Lord 
Jesus, whom he had approached in the sacrament. 
He kept repeating the words, and went with them 
on his lips to rest for the night. Not appearing 
at the usual hour for breakfast, when they went to 
his bedside they found him dead ! The excitement 
had been too much — mind and body had given 
way — and the half-idiot of earth awoke to the 
glories and the bliss of his Redeemer's presence. 

The relative whom I have mentioned had man) 
stories of a parochial fraternity of a more author- 
ized character than the parish idiots, but whose 
eccentricities also have, in a great measure, given 
way before* the assimilating spirit of the times. I 
mean the old Scottish beadle, or betheral, as he 
used to be called. Some classes of. men are found 



190 Rc?niniscences of 

to have that nameless but distinguishing character- 
istic of figure and aspect which marks out particular 
occupations and professions of mankind. This was 
so much the case in the betheral class, that an old 
lady observing a well-known judge and advocate 
walking together in the street, remarked to a friend 
as they passed by, " Dear me, Lucy, wha are-thae 
twa beddle- looking bodies !" They were often great 
originals, and, I suspect, must have been somewhat 
given to convivial habits, from a remark I recollect 
of the late Baron Clerk Rattray, viz., that in his 
younger days he had hardly ever known a perfectly 
sober betheral. However this may have been, they 
were, as a class, remarkable for quaint humour, and 
for being shrewd observers of what was going on. 
I have heard of an occasion where the betheral 
made his wits furnish an apology for his want of 
sobriety. He had befen sent round the parish by 
the minister to deliver notices at all the houses of 
the catechising which was to precede the preparation 
for receiving the communion. On his return it was 
quite evident that he had partaken too largely of 
refreshment since he had been on his expedition. 
The minister reproached him for this improper con- 
duct. The betheral pleaded the pressing hospitality 
of the parishioners. The clergyman did not admit 
the plea, and added, " Now, John, I go through 
the parish, and you don't see me return fou as you 
have done." " Ay, minister," rejoined the betheral, 
with much complacency, " but then aiblins ye're no 



Scottish Life Sf Chara^ter, igi 

sae popular i' the parish as me." My relative used 
to tell of one of these officials receiving, \N\t\\ much 
ceremony, a brother betheral from a neighbouring 
parish, who had come with the minister thereof about 
to preach for some special occasion. After service, 
the betheral of the stranger clergyman felt proud of" 
the performance of the appointed duty, and said, in a 
triumphant tone, to his friend, " 1 think our minister 
did vveel ; ay, he gars the stour flee out o' the cush- 
ion." To which the other rejoined, with a calm 
feeling of superiority, " Stour oot o' the cushion ! 
hout, our minister, sin' he cam wi' us, has dung the 
guts oot o' twa bibles." Another description 1 have 
heard of an energetic preacher more forcible than 
delicate — " Eh, our minister had a great power o' 
watter, for he grat and spat, and swat like mischeef." 
An obliging anonymous correspondent has sent me a 
story of a functionary of this class whose pride was 
centred not so much in the performance of the min- 
ister as of the precentor. He states, that he remem- 
bers an old beadle of the church which was called 
" Haddo's Hole," and sometimes the " Little Kirk," 
in Edinburgh, v.'hose son occasionally officiated as 
precentor. He was not very well qualified for the 
duty, but the father had a high opinion of his son's 
vocal powers. In those days there was always ser- 
vice in the church on the Tuesday evenings \ and 
when the father was asked on such occasions, 
"Who's to preach to-night?" his self-complacent 
reply used to be, " I divna ken wha's till preach, but 



192 Reminiscences of 

my son's for till precent." This class of function- 
aries were very free in their remarks upon the preach- 
ing of strangers, who used occasionally to occupy the 
pulpit of their church — the city betherals speaking 
sometimes in a most condescending manner of clergy 
from the provincial parishes. As, for example, a 
betheral of one of the large churches in Glasgow, 
criticising the sermon of a minister from the coun- 
try who had been preaching in the city church, char- 
acterized it as " Gude coorse country wark." A 
betheral of one of the churches of St. Giles', Edin- 
burgh, used to call on the family of J\ir. Robert 
Stevenson, engineer, who was one of the elders. On 
one occasion they asked him, what had been the text 
on such a night, when none of the family had been 
present. The man of office, confused at the ques- 
tion, and unwilling to shew anything like ignorance, 
poured forth, " Weel, ye see, the text last day, was 
just entirely, sirs — yes — the text, sirs — what was 
it again — ou ay, just entirely, ye see it was, ' What 
profitcth a man if he lose the world, and gain his 
own soul.' " Most of such stories are usually of 
an old standing. A more recent one has been told 
me of a betheral in a royal burgh much decayed 
from former importance, and governed by a feeble 
municipality of old men who continued in office, and 
in fact constituted rather the shadow than the sub- 
stance of a corporation. A clergyman from a dis- 
tance having come to officiate in the parish church, 
the betheral knowing the terms on which it was 



Scottish Life Sf Character, igg 

usual for the minister officiating to pray for the 
efficiency of the local magistracy, quietly cautioned 
the clergyman before service that, in regard to the 
town council there, it would be quite out of place 
for him to pray that they should be a " terror to evil 
doers," because, as he said, the " poor auld bodies 
could be nae terror to onybody.'* The beadle of a 
country parish is usually called the minister's man, 
and to one of these, who had gone through a long 
course of such parish official life, a gentleman one 
day remarked — "John, ye hae been sae lang about 
the minister's hand that I dare say ye could preach 
a sermon yersell now." To which John modestly 
replied, " Oh na, sir, I couldna preach a sermon, 
but maybe I could draw an inference." " Well, 
John," said the gentleman, humouring the quiet 
vanity of the beadle, " what inference could ye 
draw frae this text, ' a wild ass snufFeth up the 
wind at her pleasure? ' " (Jer. ii. 24.) '' Weel, sir, 
I wad draw this inference, he wad snufF a lano- 

to 

time afore he would fatten upon't." I had an anec- 
dote from a friend of a reply from a betheral to the 
minister in church, which was quaint and amusing 
from the shrewd self-importance it indicated in his 
own acuteness. The clergyman had been annoyed 
during the course of his sermon by the restlessness 
and occasional whining of a dog, which at last be- 
gan to bark outright." He looked out for the bea- 
dle, and directed him very peremptorily, " John, 
carry that dog out." John looked up to the pulpit, 
1:5 



1 94 Reminiscences of 

and with a very knowing expression said, " Na, na, 
sir; I'se just mak him gae out on his ain four legs.* 
I have another story of canine misbehaviour in 
church. A dog was present during the service, 
and in the sermon the worthy minister was in the 
habit of speaking very loud, and, in fact, when he 
got warmed with his subject, of shouting almost to 
the top of his voice. The dog who, in the early 
part, had been very quiet, became quite excited, as 
is not uncommon with some dogs when hearing a 
noise, and from whinging and whining, as the speak- 
er's voice rose loud and strong, at last began to 
bark and howl. The minister, naturally much an- 
noyed at the interruption, called upon the betheral 
to put out the dog, who at once expressed his read- 
iness to obey the order, but could not resist- the 
temptation to look up to the pulpit, and to say very 
significantly, " Ay, ay, sir ; but indeed it was yer- 
sell began it." There is a dog story connected 
with " Reminiscences of Glasgow " (see "Chambers' 
Journal," March 1855), which is full of meaning. 
The bowls of rum punch which so remarkably 
characterized the Glasgow dinners of last century 
and the early part of the present, it is to be feared 
made some of the congregation given to somnolency 
on the Sundays following. The members of the 
town-council often adopted Saturday for such meet- 
ings ; accordingly, the Rev. Mr. Thom, an excel- 
lent clergyman, took occasion to mark this propen- 
sity with some acerbity. A dog had been very 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 195 

troublesome, and disturbed the congregation for some 
time, when the minister at last gave orders to the 
beadle, "Take out that dog j he'd wauken a Glas- 
gow magistrate." 

It would be impossible in these reminiscences to 
omit the well-known and often-repeated anecdote 
connected with an eminent divine of our own coun- 
try, whose works take a high place in our theological 
literature. The story to which I allude was rendered 
popular throughout the kingdom., som.e years ago, by 
the inimitable mode in which it was told or rather 
acted by the late Charles Matthews. But Matthews 
was wrong in the person of whom he related the 
humorous address. I have assurance of the parties 
from a friend, whose father, a distinguished clergy- 
man in the Scottish church at the time, had accurate 
knowledge of the whole circumstances. The late 
celebrated Dr. Macknight, a learned and profound 
scholar and commentator, was nevertheless, as a 
preacher, to a great degree, heavy, unrelieved by fan- 
cy or imagination j an able writer, but a dull speaker. 
His colleague Dr. Henry, well known as the author 
of a history of England, was, on the other hand, a 
man of great humour, and could not resist a ioke 



when the temptation came upon him. On one oc- 
casion when coming to church, Dr. Macknight had 
been caught in a shower of rain, and entered the 
vestry soaked with wet. Every means were used to 
relieve him from his discomfort ; but as the time 
drew on for divine service he became much dis 



lyG Rejiiiniscences of 

tressed, and ejaculated over and over, " Oh, I wush 
that I was dry ; do you think I'm dry; do you think 
I'm dry eneuch noo ? " His jocose colleague could 
resist no longer, but, patting him on the shoulder, 
comforted him with the sly assurance, " Bide a wee. 
Doctor, and ye'se be dry eneuch when ye get into 
the pu'pit." Another quaint remark of the facetious 
Doctor to his more formal colleague has been pre- 
served by friends of the family. Dr. Henry, who, 
with all his pleasantry and abilities, had himself as 
little popularity in the pulpit as his coadjutor, had 
been remarking to Dr. Macknight what a blessing it 
was that thev two were colleagues in one charge, and 
continued dwelling on the subject so long, that Dr. 
M., not quite pleased at the frequent reiteration of 
the remark, said that it certainly was a great pleasure 
to himself, but he did not see what great benefit it 
might be to the world. "Ah," said Dr. Henry, 
" an it hadna been for that, there wad hae been twa 
toom ^ kirks this day." I am indebted to a gentle- 
man, himself also a distinguished member of the 
Scottish church, for an authentic anecdote of this 
learned divine, and which occurred whilst Dr. Mac- 
knight was the minister of Maybole. One of his 
parishioners, a well-known humorous blacksmith of 
the parish, who, no doubt, thought that the Doctor's 
learned books were rather a waste of time and labour 
for a country pastor, was asked if his minister was 
at home. The Doctor was then busy bringing out 
1 Empty. 



Scottish Life Sj- Character. 197 

his laborious and valuable work, his " Harmony of 
the Four Gospels.'* " Na, he's gane to Edinburgh 
on a verra useless job." On being asked what this 
useless work might be which engaged his p2stor!3 
time and attention, he answered, " He's gane to mak 
four men agree wha ne'er cast out." The good-hu- 
moured and candid answer of a learned and rather 
long-winded preacher of the old school, always ap- 
peared to me quite charming. The good man was 
far from being a popular preacher, and yet he could 
not reduce his discourses below the hour and a half. 
On being asked, as a gentle hint, of their possibly 
needless length, if he did not feel tired after preach- 
ing so long, he replied, " Na, na, I'm no tired ; " 
adding, however, wfth much naivete, '' But, Lord, 
hoo tired the fowk whiles are." 

The late o;oc)d, kind-hearted Dr. David Dickson 
was fond of telling a story of a Scottish termagant 
of the days before kirk-session discipline had passed 
away. A couple were brought before the court, and 
Janet, the wife, was charged with violent and undu- 
tiful conduct, and with wounding her husband, by 
throwing a three-legged stool at his head. The 
minister rebuked her conduct, and pointed out its 
grievous character, by explaining that just as Christ 
was head of his church, so the husband was head of 
the wife ; and therefore, in assaulting him^ she had, 
in fact, injured her own body. " Weel," she replied, 
" it's come to a fine pass gin a wife canna kame her 
ain head j " " Aye, but Janet," rejomed the minister, 



198 



Re??iiniscences 0. 



" a three-lego-ed stool is a thief-like bane kame to 
scart yer ain head wi' ! " 

Our object in bringing up and recording anecdotes 
©f this knid is to elucidate the sort of humour we 
refer to, and to shew it as a humour of past times. 
A modern clergyman could hardly adopt the tone and 
manner of the older class of ministers — men not 
less useful and beloved, on account of their odd 
Scottish humour, which indeed suited their time. 
Could a clergyman, for instance, now come off from 
the trying position in which we have heard of a 
northern minister being placed, and by the same way 
through which he extricated himself with much good 
nature and quiet sarcasm ? A young man sitting op- 
posite to him in the front of the gallery had been up 
late on the previous night, and had stuffed the cards 
with which he had been occupied into his coat pock- 
et. Foro-etting; the circumstance, he pulled out his 
handkerchief, and the cards all flew about. The 
minister simply looked at him, and remarked, " Eh 
man, your psalm buik has been ill bund." 

Many anecdotes of pithy and facetious replies are 
recorded of a minister of the south, usually distin- 
guished as " Our Watty Dunlop." On one occa- 
sion two irreverent young fellows determined, as 
they said, to " taigle" ^ the minister. Coming up 
to him in the High Street of Dumfries, they ac- 
costed him with much solemnity. " Maister Dunlop, 
dae ye hear the news?" "What news?" "Oh, 
^ Confound. 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 195 

the deil's dead." " Is he," said Mr. Dunlop, " then 
I maun pray for twa faitherless bairns." *On another 
occasion Maister Dunlop met, with characteristic hu- 
mour, an attempt to play off a trick against him. 
It was known that he was to dine with a minister, 
whose manse was close to the church, so that his 
return home must be through the churchyard. Ac- 
cordingly, some idle and mischievous youths waited 
for him in the dark night, and one of them came 
up to him, dressed as a ghost, in hopes of putting 
him in a fright. Watty's cool accost speedily upset 
the plan. " Weel, Maister Ghaist, is this a gen- 
eral rising, or are ye juist taking a daunder frae your 
grave by yersell ? " I have received from a cor- 
respondent another specimen of Watty's acute re- 
joinders. Some years ago the celebrated Edward 
Irving had been lecturing at Dumfries, and a man 
who passed as a wag in that locality, had been 
to hear him. He met Watty Dunlop the follow- 
ing day, who said, " Weel, Willie, man, an' what 
do ye think of Mr. Irving?" "Oh," said Willie 
contemptuously, " the man's crack't." Dunlop pat- 
ted him on the shoulder, with the quiet remark, 
'' Willie, ye'll aften see a light peeping through a 
crack!'' 

An admirable story of a quiet pulpit rebuke, is 
traditionary in Fife, and is told of Mr. Shirra, a 
seceding minister, of Kirkcaldy, a man still well 
remembered by some of the older generation for 
many excellent and sorne eccentric qualities. A 



200 Reminncences of 

young officer of a volunteer corps on duty in the 
place, very f)roud of his fresh uniform, had come to 
Mr. Shirra's church, and w^alked about as if looking 
for a seat, but in fact to shew ofF his dress, vi^hich he 
saw was attracting attention from some of the less 
grave members of the congregation. He canie t(> 
his place, however, rather quickly, on Mr. Shirra 
quietly remonstrating, " O man, will ye sit doun, 
and we'll see your new breeks when the kirk's 
dune." This same Mr. Shirra was well known 
from his quaint, and as it were, parenthetical com- 
ments which he introduced in his reading of Script- 
ure; as, for example, on reading from the i i6th 
Psalm, " I said in my haste all men are liars," he 
quietly observed, " Indeed, Dauvid, an ye had 
been i' this parish ye might hae said it at your 
leesure." 

There was something even still more pungent 
in the incidental remark of a good man, in the 
course of his sermon, who had in a country place 
taken to preaching out of doors in the summer 
afternoons. He used to collect the people as they 
were taking air by the side of a stream outside the 
village. On one occasion he had unfortunately 
taken his place on a bank, and fixed himself on an 
anfs nest. The active habits of those little crea- 
tures soon made the position of the intruder upon 
their domain very uncomfortable ; and afraid that 
his audience might observe something of this dis- 
comfort in his manner, apologised by the remark — 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 201 

'* Brethren, though I hope I have the word of God 
in my mouth, I think the deil himself has gotten 
into my breeks." 

There was often no doubt a sharp conflict of 
wits when some of these humorist ministers came 
into collision with members of their flocks who 
were also humorists. Of this nature is the follow- 
ing anecdote, which I am assured is genuine. A 
minister in the north was taking to task one of his 
hearers who was a frequent defaulter, and was re- 
proaching him as an habitual absentee from pub- 
lic worship. The accused vindicated himself on the 
plea of a dislike to long sermons. " 'Deed, man," 
said his reverend monitor, a little nettled at the in- 
sinuation thrown out against himself, " if ye dinna 
mend, ye may land yersell where ye'll no be troub- 
led wi' mony sermons either lang or short." " Weel, 
aiblins sae," retorted John, " but it may na be for 
want o' ministers." An answer to Mr. Shirra himself, 
strongly illustrative of Scottish ready and really clev- 
er wit, and which I am assured is quite authentic, 
must, I think, have struck the fancy of that excel- 
lent humorist himself. When Mr. Shirra was parish 
minister of St. Ninian's, one of the members of the 
church was John Henderson or Anderson — a very 
decent douce shoemaker — and who left the church 
and joined the Independents, who had a meeting in 
Stirling. Some time afterwards, when Mr. Shirra 
met John on the road, he said, " And so, John, 
I understand you have become an Independent V 



202 Rem.in'scences of 

" 'Deed, sir," replied John, " that's true." « Oh, 
John," said the minister, " Pm sure you ken that 
a rowin' (rolhng) stane gathers nae fog" (moss). 
" Aye," said John, " that's true too ; but can ye 
tell me what guid the fog does to the stane ?" Mr, 
Shirra himself afterwards became a Baptist. The 
wit, however, was all in favour of the minister in 
the following : — 

Dr. Gilchrist, formerly of the East Parish of 
Greenock, and who died minister of the Canongate, 
Edinburgh, received an intimation of one of his 
hearers, who had been exceedingly irregular in his 
attendance, that he had taken seats in an Episcopal 
chapel. One day soon after, he met his former 
parishioner, who told him that he had " changed 
his religion." " Indeed," said the Doctor quietly, 
" how's that ? I ne'er heard ye had ony." It was 
this same Di*. Gilchrist who gave the well-known 
quiet but forcible rebuke to a young minister whom 
he considered rather conceited and fond of putting 
forward his own doings, and who was to officiate 
in the Doctor's church. He explained to him the 
mode in which he usually conducted the service, 
and seated that he always finished the prayer before 
the sermon with the Lord's Prayer. The young 
minister demurred at this, and asked if he " might 
not introduce any other short prayer?" " Ou aye," 
was the Doctor's quiet reply, " gif ye can gie us 
ony thing better.'' 

At Banchory, on Deeside, some of the criticisms 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 203 

and remarks on sermons were very quaint and char 
acteristic. My cousin had asked the Ley's grieve 
what he thought of a young man's preaching, who 
rather imitated the ornate language than the power- 
ful ideas of Dr. Chalmers, drily answered, " Ou, 
Sir Thomas, just a floorish o' the surface." But 
the same hearer bore this unequivocal testimony to 
another preacher whom he really admired. He was 
asked if he did not think the sermon long, " Na, 
I shuld nae hae thocht it lang an' Pd been sitting 
on thorns." 

The following anecdotes, collected from different 
contributors, are fair samples of the quaint and orig- 
inal character of Scottish ways and expressions now 
becoming more and more matters of reminiscence : 
— A poor man came to his minister for the purpose 
of intimating his intention of being married. As he 
expressed, however, some doubts on the subject, and 
seemed to hesitate, the minister asked him if there 
were any doubts about his being accepted. No, that 
was not the difficulty ; but he expressed a fear that 
it might not be altogether suitable, and he asked 
whether, if he were once married, he could not (in 
case of unsuitability and unhappiness) get unmAV- 
ried ? The clergyman assured him that it was im- 
possible ; if he married it must be for better and 
worse J that he could not go back upon the step. 
So thus instructed he went away. After a time he 
returned, and said he had made up his mind to try 
the experiment, and he came and was married. Ere 



204 Reminiscences of 

long he came back very disconsolate, and declared 
it would not do at all ; that he was quite miserable, 
and begged to be unmarried. The minister assured 
him that was out of the question, and urged him to 
put away the notion of anything so absurd. The 
man insisted that the marriage could not hold good 
for the wife was waur than the deevil. The min- 
ister demurred, saying that was quite impossible. 
" Na," said the poor man, *' the Bible tells \ e that 
if ye resist the deil he flees frae ye, but if ye resist 
her she flees at ye." 

A faithful minister of the gospel being one day en- 
gaged in visiting some members of his flock, came to 
the door of a house where his gentle tapping could 
not be heard for the noise of contention within. After 
waiting a little he opened the door, and walked in, say- 
ing, with an authoritative voice, "I should like to 
know who is the head of this house." " Weel, sir," 
said the husband and father, " if ye sit doon a wee, 
we'll maybe be able to tell ye, for we're just trying to 
settle that point." 

A minister in the north returning thanks in his 
prayers one Sabbath for the excellent harvest, began, 
as usual, " O Lord, we thank thee," etc., and went 
on to mention its abundance, and its safe ingathering; 
but feeling anxious to be quite candid and scrupu- 
lously truthful, aaded, " all except a few fields be- 
tween this and Stonehaven, not worth mentioning." 

A Scotch preacher being sent to officiate one Sun- 
day at a country parish, was accommodated at night 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 205 

in the manse, in a very diminutive closet, instead of 
the usual best bed-room appropriated to strangers. 

" Is this the bed-room ? " he said, starting back in 
amazement. 

" 'Deed aye sir, this is the prophets' chalmer." 

" It maun be for the minor prophets, then,*"' was 
the quiet reply. 

Elders of the kirk, no doubt, frequently partook 
of the original and humorous character of ministers 
and others, their contemporaries ; and amusing scenes 
must have passed, and good Scotch sayings been 
said, where they were concerned. Dr. Chalmers 
used to repeat one of these sayings of an elder 
with great delight. The Doctor associated with 
the anecdote the name of Lady Glenorchy and the 
church which she endowed ; but I am assured that 
the person was Lady Elizabeth Cunninghame, sister 
of Archibald eleventh Earl of Eglinton, and wife 
of Sir John Cunninghame, Bart, of Caprington, near 
Kilmarnock. It seems her ladyship had, for some 
reason, taken offence at the proceedings of the Cap- 
rington parochial authorities, and a result of which 
was that she ceased putting her usual liberal offering 
into the plate at the door. This had gone on for some 
time, till one of the elders, of a less forbearing char- 
acter than the others, took his turn at the plate. 
Lady Elizabeth, as usual, passed by without a con- 
tribution, but made a formal courtesy to the elder as 
she passed, and sailed majestically up the aisle. The 
good man was determined not to let her pass so 



2o6 Reminiscences of 

easily. He quickly followed her up the passage, antl 
urged the ren^ionstrance, " My lady, gie us less o' 
your mainers and mair o' your siller." ^ 

Of an eccentric and eloquent professor and divine 
of a northern Scottish university, there are numer- 
ous and extraordinary traditionary anecdotes. I have 
received an account of some of these anecdotes 
from the kind communication of an eminent Scot- 



1 Although the name of Lady Glenorchy has been errone- 
ously associated with the above story, and with a demeanour 
which was quite foreign to her general character, still it is very 
suitable, I think, to retain my former reference to the history of 
this noble lady since her death as forming a striking illustration 
of the uncertainty of all earthly concerns, and as supplying a 
Scottish reminiscence belonging to the last seventy years. Wil- 
helmina Viscountess Glenorchy, during her lifetime, built and 
endowed a church for two ministers, who were provided with 
very handsome incomes. She died 17th July, 1786, and was 
buried on the 24th July, aged 44. Her interment took place, 
by her own direction, in the church she had founded, immedi- 
ately in front of the pulpit ; and she fixed upon that spot as a 
place of security and safety, where her mortal remains might 
rest in peace till the morning of the resurrection. But alas for 
the uncertainty of all earthly plans and projects for the future ! 
— the iron road came on its reckless course, and swept the 
church away. The site was required for the North British 
Railway, which passed directly over the spot where Lady Glen- 
orchy had been buried. Her remains were accordingly disin- 
tered 24th December 1844; and the trustees of the church, 
not having yet erected a new one, deposited the body of their 
foundress in the vaults beneath St. John's Episcopal Church, 
and after resting there for fifteen years, were, in 1859, removed 
to the building which is now Lady Glenorchy 's Church. 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 207 

tish clergyman, who was himself in early days his 
frequent hearer. The stories told of the strange 
observations and allusions which he introduced into 
his pulpit discourses, almost surpass belief. For 
many reasons, they are not suitable to the nature 
of this publication, still less could they be tolerated 
in any pulpit administration now, although familiar to 
his contemporaries. The remarkable circumstance, 
however, connected with these eccentricities was, 
that he introduced them with the utmost gravity, and 
oftentimes after he had delivered them, pursued his 
subject with great earnestness and eloquence, as if 
he had said nothing uncommon. One saying of the 
Professor, however, out of the pulpit, is too good to 
be omitted, and may be recorded without violation 
of propriety. He happened to meet at the house of 
a lawyer, whom he considered rather a man of shm^p 
practice, and for whom he had no great favour, two 
of his own parishioners. The lawyer jocularly and 
ungraciously put the question : " Doctor, these are 
members of your flock \ may I ask, do you look 
upon them as white sheep or as black sheep ? " " I 
don't know,'* answered the Professor drily, "wheth- 
er they are black or white sheep, but I know that if 
they are long here they are pretty sure to be fleeced." 
I cannot do better in regard to the three following 
anecdotes of the late Professor Gillespie of St. An- 
drews, than give them to my readers in the words 
with which Dr. Lindsay Alexander kindly communi- 
cated them to me. 



2o8 Rtminiscences of 

" In the ' Cornhill Magazine' for March i860, in 
an article on Student Life in Scotland, there is an 
anecdote of the late Professor Gillespie of St. An- 
drews, which is told in such a way as to miss the 
point and humour of the story. The correct ver- 
sion, as I have heard it from the Professor himself, 
is this : having employed the village carpenter to put 
a frame round a dial at the manse of Cults, where 
he was minister, he received from the man a bill to 
the following effect, — ' To fencing the deil^ 5s. 6d.' 
' When I paid him,' said the Professor, ' I could not 
help saying, John, this is rather more than I counted 
on ; but I haven't a word to say. I get somewhere 
about two hundred a year for fencing the deil^ and 
I'm afraid I don't do it half so effectually as you've 
done.' 

" Whilst I am writing, another of the many stories 
of the learned and facetious Professor rises in my 
mind. There was a worthy old woman at Cults 
whose place in church was what is commonly called 
the Lateran ; a kind of small gallery at the top of 
the pulpit steps. She was a most regular attender, 
but as regularly fell asleep during sermon, of which 
fault the preacher had sometimes audible intimation. 
It was observed, however, that though Janet always 
slept during her own pastor's discourse, she could be 
attentive enough when she pleased, and especially was 
she alert when some young preacher occupied the 
pulpit. A little piqued, perhaps, at this, Mr. Gilles- 
pie said to her one day, ' Janet, I think you hardly 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 209 

behave very respectfully to your own minister in one 
respect.' ' Me, sir,' exclaimed Janet, ' I wad like 
to see ony man, no to say woman, by yoursel say 
that o' me ! what can you mean, sir ? ' ' Weel, 
Janet, ye ken when I preach, you're almost always 
fast asleep before I've well given out my text ; but 
when any of these young men from St. Andrews 
preach for me, I see you never sleep a wink. Now, 
that's what I call no using me as you should do.' 
' Hoot, sir,* was the reply, ' is that a' .? I'll sune tell 
you the reason o' that. When you preach, we a' ken 
the word o' God's safe in your hands ; but when 
these young birkies tak' it in haun, my certie, but it 
tak's us a' to look after them.' ^ 

" r am tempted to subjoin another. In the Hu- 
manity Class, one day, a youth who was rather 
fond of shewing ofF his powers of language, trans- 
lated Hor. Od, iii., 3, 61, 62, somewhat thus: 
' The fortunes of Troy renascent under sorrowful 
omen shall be repeated with sad catastrophe.' ' Ca- 
tastrophe,' cried the Professor. ' Catastrophe, Mr. 
— — — . that's Greek. Give* us it in plain English, 
if you please ? ' Thus suddenly pulled down from 
his high horse, the student effected his retreat with 
a rather lame and impotent version, ' Now,' said 
the Professor, his little sharp eyes twinkling with 

1 I have abundant evidence to prove that a similar answer 
to that which Dr. Alexander records to have been made to 
Mr. Gillespie, has been given on similar occasions by others. 
E. B. R. 

14 



2 1 o Reminiscences of 

fun, ' that brings to my recollection what once 
happened to a friend of mine, a minister in the 
country. Being a scholarly man, he was some- 
times betrayed into the use of words in the pulpit 
which the people were not likely to understand, 
but being very conscientious, he never detected 
himself in this, without pausing to give the mean- 
ing of the word he had used, and sometimes his 
extempore explanations of very fine words were a 

little like what we have just h^d from Mr. , 

rather too flat and commonplace. On one occa- 
sion, he allowed this very word 'catastrophe' to 
drop from him, on which he immediately added, 
' that you know, my friends, means the end of a 
thing.' Next day, as he was riding through his 
parish, some mischievous youth succeeded in fas- 
tening a bunch of furze to his horse's tail, — a trick 
which, had the animal been skittish, might have 
exposed the worthy pastor's horsemanship to too 
severe a trial, but which happily had no effect what- 
ever on the sober-minded and respectable quadru- 
ped which he bestrode.* On, therefore, he quietly 
jogged, utterly unconscious of the addition that 
had been made to his horse's caudal region, until, 
as he was passing some cottages, he was arrested 
by the shrill voice of an old woman, exclaiming, 
* Heh, sir ! Heh, sir ! there's a whun-buss at your 
horse's catawstrophe ! ' " 

I have brought in the following anecdote, exactly 
as it appeared in the Scotsman of October 4, 1859, 



Scottish Life 8f Character. 2 1 1 

because it introduces the name of Rev. John Skin- 
ner, of Langside, author of " Tullochgorum,** 
"The Ewie wi' the Crooked Horn," and other ex- 
cellent Scottish songs. Skinner was also a learned 
divine, and wrote theological works in Latin and 
English. He was a correspondent of Burns, and his 
name was " familiar as household words " to the old 
people of Aberdeenshire and Forfar. The anecdote 
I allude to was thus introduced : — 

"An Omission in Dean Ramsay's 'Reminis- 
cences.' — The late Rev. John Skinner, long Epis- 
copal clergyman of Forfar, was first appointed to a 
charge in Montrose, from whence he was removed 
to Banff, and ultimately to Forfar. After he had 
left Montrose, it reached his ears that an ill-natured 
insinuation was circulating in Montrose that he had 
been induced to leave this town by the temptation of 
a better income and of fat pork, which, it would ap- 
pear, was plentiful in the locality of his new incum- 
bency. Indignant at such an aspersion, he wrote a 
letter, directed to his maligners, vindicating himself 
sharply from it, which he shewed to his grandfather, 
the well-known rev. and accomplished poet John 
Skinner of Langside, for his approval. The old gen- 
tleman objected to it as too lengthy, and proposed 
the following pithy substitute : — 

* Had Skinner been of carnal mind, 

As strangely ye suppose, 
Or had he even been fond of swine. 

He'd ne'er have left Montrose.' " 



2 1 2 Reminiscences of 

But there is an anecdote of John Skinner which 
should endear his memory to every generous and 
loving heart. On one occasion he w^as passing a 
small dissenting place of v^rorship at the time vi^hen 
the congregation v^^ere engaged in singing; on pass- 
ing the door — old fashioned Scottish Episcopalian 
as he was — he reverently took ofF his hat. His 
companion said to him, " What ! do you feel so 
much sympathy with this Anti-Burgher congrega- 
tion ? " " No," said Mr. Skinner, " but I respect 
and love any of my fellow Christians who are en- 
gaged in singing to the glory of the Lord Jesus 
Christ." Well done, old Tullochgorum ! thy name 
shall be loved and honoured by every true liberal- 
minded Scotsman. 

On the subject of epigrams, I have received a 
clever impromptu of a judge's lady, produced in re- 
ply to one made by the witty Henry Erskine. At a 
dinner party at Lord Armadale's, when a bottle of 
claret was called for, port was brought in by mistake. 
A second time claret was sent for, arfd a second time 
the same mistake occurred. Henry Erskine addressed 
the host in an impromptu, which was meant as a 
parody on the well-knov^^n Scottish song, " My jo, 
Janet" — 

" Kind sir, it's for your courtesie 
When I come here to dine, sir. 
For the love ye bear to me, 
Gie me the claret wine, sir." 

To which Mrs. Honeyman retorted — 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 2\p^ 

" Drink the port, the claret's dear, 
Erskine, Erskine ; 
Ye'll get fou on't, never fear, 
My jo, Erskine." 

Some of my younger readers may not be familiar 
with the epigram of John Home, author of the trag- 
edy of " Douglas." The lines were great favourites 
with Sir Walter Scott, who delighted in repeating 
them. Home was very partial to claret, and could 
not bear port. He was exceedingly indignant when 
the government laid a tax upon claret, having previ- 
ously long connived at its introduction into Scotland 
under very mitigated duties. He embodied his an- 
ger in the following epigram — 

" Firm and erect the Caledonian stood, 
Old was his mutton, and his claret good ; 
* Let him drink port,' an English statesman cried — 
He drank the poison, and his spirit died." 

There is a curious story traditionary in some fam- 
ilies regarding a Scottish nobleman, celebrated in 
Scottish history, which, I am assured, is true, and 
farther, that it has never yet appeared in print. The 
story is, therefore, a Scottish reminiscence, and, as 
such, deserves a place here. The Earl of Lauder- 
dale was so ill as to cause great alarm to his friends, 
and perplexity to his physicians. One distressing 
symptom was a total absence of sleep, and the med- 
ical men declared their opinion, that without sleep 
being induced, he could not recover. His son, a 
queer eccentric-looking boy, who was considered 



214 Remh iscences of 

not entirely right in his mind, but somewhat ''^ daft^'' 
and who accordingly had had little attention paid to 
his education, was sitting under the table, and cried 
out, " Sen' for that preaching man frae Livingstone, 
for he aye sleeps in the kirk." One of the doc- 
tors thought this hint worth attending to. The 
experiment of "getting a minister till him" suc- 
ceeded, and sleep coming on, he recovered. The 
Earl, out of gratitude for this benefit, took more no- 
tice of his son, paid attention to his education, and 
that boy became the Duke of Lauderdale, afterwards 
so famous or infamous in his country's history. 

The following very amusing anecdote, although 
it belongs more properly to the division or pecu- 
liarities of Scottish dialect and phraseology, I give 
in the words of a correspondent who received it 
from the parties with whom it originated. About 
twenty years ago, he was paying a visit to a cousin, 
married to a Liverpool merchant of some standing. 
The husband had lately had a visit from his aged 
father, who formerly followed the occupation of 
farming in Stirlingshire, and who had probably 
never been out of Scotland before in his life. The 
son, finding his father rather de trop in his office, 
one day persuaded him to cross the ferry over the 
Mersey, and inspect the harvesting, then in full 
operation, on the Cheshire side. On landing he 
approached a young woman reaping with the sickle 
in a field of oats, when the following dialogue en- 
sued : — 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 215 

Partner. — Lassie, are yer aits muckle bookit 
th' year ? 

Reader. — Sir ! 

Farmer. — I was speiring gif yer aits are muckle 
bookit th' year. 

Reaper (in amazement). — I really don't know 
what you are saying, sir. 

Farmer (in equal astonishment). — Gude — safe 
— us, — do ye no understaan gude plain English! 
^are — yer — aits — muckle — bookit ? 

Reaper decamps to her nearest companion say- 
ing that was a madman, while he shouted in great 
wrath, " They were naething else than a set o' 
ignorant pockpuddings." 

The following anecdote is highly illustrative of 
the thoroughly attached old family serving-man. 
A correspondent sends it as told to him by an old 
schoolfellow of Sir Walter Scott's at Fraser and 
Adam's class. High School. 

One of the lairds of Abercairnie proposed to go 
out^ on the occasion of one of the risings for the 
Stuarts, in the '15 or '45 — but this was not with 
the will of his old serving-man, who, when Aber- 
cairnie was pulling on his boots, preparing to go, 
overturned a kettle of boiling water upon his legs, 
so as to disable him from joining his friends — say- 
ing, "Tak that — Let them fecht wha like, stay 
ye at hame and be Laird o' Abercairnie." 

A story illustrative of a union of polite cour- 
tesy, with rough and violent ebullition of temper 



2i6 Reminiscences of 

common in the Old Scottish character, is well 
known in the Lothian family. William Henry, 
fourth Marquis of Lothian, had for his guest at 
dinner an old countess to whom he wished to shew 
particular respect and attention.^ After a very com- 
plimentary reception, he put on his white gloves to 
hand her down stairs, led her to the upper end of 
the table, bowed and retired to his own place. This 
I am assured was the usual custom with the chief 
lady guest by persons who themselves remember 
it. After all were seated, the Marquis addressed 
the lady, " Madam, may I have the honour and 
happiness of helping your ladyship to some fish ? " 
But he got no answer, for the poor woman was 
deaf as a post, and did not hear him ; after a pause, 
but still in the most courteous accents, " Madam, 
have I your ladyship's permission to send you some 
fish ? " Then a little quicker, " Is your ladyship 
inclined to take fish ? " Very quick, and rather 
peremptory, " Madam, do you choice fish ? " At 
last the thunder burst, to everybody's consterna- 
tion, with a loud thump on the table and stamp on 
the floor: " Con — found ye, will ye have any 
fish .? " I am afraid the exclamation might have 
been even of a more pungent character. 

A correspondent has kindly enabled me to add a 
reminiscence and anecdote of a type of Scottish char- 

1 This Marquis of Lothian was aid-de-camp to the Duke of 
Cumberland at the battle of Culloden, and sullied his character 
as a soldier and a nobleman by the cruelties which he exercised 
on the vanquished. 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 217 

acter now nearly extinct, — I mean the old Scottish 
military officer, of the wars of Holland, and the Low 
Countries. I give them in his own words : "My 
father, the late Rev. Dr. Bethune, minister of Dor- 
noch, was on friendly terms with a fine old soldier, 
tfte late Colonel Alexander Sutherland, of Calmaly 
and Braegrudy, in Sutherlandshire, who was Lieuten- 
ant-Colonel of the ' Local Militia^ and who used 
occasionally, in his word of command, to break out 
with a Gaelic phrase to the men, much to the amuse- 
ment of bystanders. He called his charger, a high 
boned not overfed animal, Cadaver — ^a play upon 
accents, for he was a good classical scholar, and fond 
of quoting the Latin poets. But he had no relish 
nor respect for the ' modern languages^ particularly 
for that of our neighbours, whom he looked upon as 
' hereditary ' enemies ! My father and the Colonel 
were both politicians, as well as scholars. Reading a 
newspaper article in his presence one day, my father 
stopped short, handing the paper to him, and said, 
' Colonel, here is a French quotation, which you can 
translate better than I can.' ' No, sir ! ' said the 
Colonel, ' I never learnt the lano-uag-e of the scoun- 
drels ! ! ! ' The Colonel was known as ' Col. Sandy 
Sutherland,' and the men always called him Colonel 
Sandy, He was a splendid specimen of the hale 
veteran, with a stentorian voice, and the last queue 1 
"emember to have seen." 

I have already referred to the communications 
which this little work has procured for me, from 



2 1 8 Reminiscences of 

various correspondents ; in some cases from entire 
strangers. I now wish to introduce the kind notices 
I have received from Rev. Dr. Clason, of Buccleuch 
Free Church, Edinburgh. Dr. Clason has complete- 
ly entered into my idea of recording past Scottish 
habits and manners, of the last fifty years. The let- 
ters he has written on the subject are so truly ^'Rem- 
iniscences of Scottish Life and Character," so easily 
and pleasantly narrated, and at the same time pre- 
serve so many curious particulars of a bygone time, 
that I have requested his permission to insert a great 
portion of his letters just as they were written. The 
Rev. Doctor hesitated at seeing in print what he had 
written merely as a private communication. But he 
kindly yielded to my urgent wish on the subject, and 
I am persuaded that my readers will feel with me, 
that one great charm belonging to such notes of our 
recollection of the past, is the unconstrained and in- 
formal manner of recalling them to oneself, and of 
communicating them to others. Dr. Clason's com- 
munications were contained in several letters, but I 
have taken the liberty of throwing them into one 
continued narrative, and introducing them into this 
portion of the volum.e which closes , the series of 
reminiscences, and just before the concluding re- 
marks upon the whole subject. 

In his first letter, after expressing himself with 
much kindness in regard to a little work on a re- 
ligious subject which I had sent to him, Dr. Clason 
observes, " You are certainly doing much to knit 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 219 

the professing Christians of this land more closely 
to one another, and to draw them nearer to their 
great Head. You must not wonder if I regard 
this book as in some respects kindred to the other 
volume (the Reminiscences), which reminds us 
that we are the members of one old family, who, 
making allowance for many divisions in opinion and 
taste, have much in common. I am glad to ob- 
serve that your volume of Reminiscences is grow- 
ing in popularity, and I hope you will continue to 
answer the demand for repeated editions. I would 
remark in passing, that I wish something of the 
same kind were attempted for England. I have 
had enough of intercourse with our southern neigh- 
bours to mark the striking contrast between the 
English and Scotch. Take two instances. I was 
on one occasion an outside passenger on an Eng- 
lish stage-coach ; a fellow passenger asked the 
coachman, "Does this coach run on Sundays?' 
Answer — "Thank God, no, sir." Passenger — 
" That is a great loss to you." Answer — " No, 
sir ; a man that can't earn his bread in six days, 
won't earn it in seven." This was good, but what 
would a Scotsman have said in such a case — 
" Weel, you can mind that when you pay me." 

In the other case, I asked permission from a 
young woman to enter her garden, as I had no 
other way of seeing the outline of a new church 
which was in course of being built. The requesr 
was readily granted, and when I expressed my grat- 



220 Reminiscences^ of 

itude in warm terms, and said how much I was 
obliged to her, her remark was, " Most people 
don't think so, sir." Now, a Scotch woman would 
have said, " Ou ay — you are welcome to gang in, 
but take care no to tramp on the Syboes.'* He then 
proceeds with his Scottish reminiscences : — 

" Perhaps, by way of introduction, I may be al- 
lowed to say a word or two of my own personal 
history, merely and solely for the purpose of shew- 
ing the opportunity I have had of observing the 
manners and habits of my countrymen. 

" I was born at the Manse of Dalzell (in Clydes- 
dale), which had been, before the Reformation, the 
residence of the Popish priest. No doubt it had 
been added to ; for the priest being under the vow 
of celibacy did not require many rooms. A kitchen 
and pantry, a room above, with a brewery and cellar, 
seem to have been his whole accommodation, if in- 
deed he had so much. The cellar was in more 
modern times turned into the dining-room, the only 
public room for some years after my birth in the 
manse, and three bed-rooms were added above, two 
of them very small. I am speaking of things as 
they were more than sixty years ago, and it cer- 
tainly affords a striking contrast to things as they 
are at present. 1 am afraid that some of my Free 
Church brethren would not be satisfied to occupy 
such a house now. In the course of a hv7 years, 
another public room and two bed-rooms were 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 221 

added, and then we thought we had the grandest 
house in the kingdom. But at what a cost were 
they acquired ! For the convenience of the parish, 
a church had been lateh^ built in a new locality, 
but the old church remained entire. It was a small 
but exquisite specimen of early Gothic. The chan- 
cel roofed with flagstones, and the rest in excellent 
repair. The contractor was allowed to take down 
this edifice to build the addition to the manse, and 
often he said, that if he had known the work was 
to be so laborious he would rather have gone to 
the quarry for stones. I refer to these reminis 
cences of the old church to mark the change of 
times and tastes. 

'^ Early in 180 1, my father was translated to Logic, 
near Stirling — a county that has richer stores of 
proverbs and traditions than the place of my birth, 
and HI 1815 I was ordained minister of Carmun- 
nock, near Glasgow. Lady Stuart of Castlemilk 
was my patroness — a lady of singular talent and 
Christian worth, and withal thoroughly Scotch, who 
spoke Scotch, thought in Scotch, and who knew 
well the peculiarities of Scottish humour and char- 
acter. She was indeed as a mother to the parish, 
and specially to the minister; and, besides better 
things, I learned from her many Scotch words and 
proverbs which I had never before heard. 

" You refer to Miss Erskine of Dun. I remem- 
ber meeting her and her mother at Castlemilk, and 
I refer to the fact as marking the easy terms on 



222 Reminiscences of 

which the gentry of former times lived with one 
another. We were at dinner when the carriage 
arrived. No matter. The ladies took off their 
bonnets and sat down to dinner. Some little re- 
gret was expressed that we had begun before they 
came, and all the answer was, ' Ou, did ye no get 
our letter ? ' Thus everything was settled, and the 
conversation flowed on so 'naturally and so genially 
that no one thought of inquiring after the missing 
letter. Lady S. expressed great contempt at the 
formality of modern intercourse among families. 
' Invitations to dinner a fortnight or three weeks 
hence are foolish, for no one knows what may hap- 
pen within that time ; ' and instances did occur 
which she noticed as illustrative of her remark. 
In some instances death, in others severe affliction, 
but, in spite of the reason of the thing, old rules 
have yielded to modern innovations. 

" As I presume to use so much liberty as a corre- 
spondent, so I do not ask you nor expect that yo i are 
to take notice of all the trifles I may write. 

" As you know, we Scotch ministers are charac- 
teristically fond of ' heads,' I mean, in the first in- 
stance, to write of three things — i. Birth and bap- 
tism ; 2. Marriage, and ceremonies connected there- 
with ; 3. Deaths and Funerals. 

" I. Births^ etc, — In my younger days it was the 
fashion for the better classes of society to intimate a 
birth in the family as we still do a death. In Hamil- 
ton, the announcement was made in a truly primitive 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 223 

style, not by a billet, but by a verbal message, — 
'Mrs. A.'s compliments to Mrs. B., and she's lichter 
o* a laddie or lass bairn ' (as the case might be). 

"There is a custom, strictly Scottish, which used 
to be connected with the preliminaries of the baptism 
service, and which may occasionally be found in the 
present day. A young unmarried woman takes the 
child to church, and she carries in her hand a slice 
of bread and cheese, with a pin out of the child's 
dress, which she is bound to give to the first male 
person she meets. Since I became a minister I heard 
of an amusing incident resulting from this custom. 
An English duke (his name is of no consequence) 
had arrived in Glasgow on a Sunday, and was wan- 
dering in the streets during the time of afternoon 
service. A young woman came up to him with a 
child in her arms, and presented a slice of bread and 
cheese. In vain he protested that he did not know 
what she meant — that he had nothing to do with 
her or the child — that he was an entire stranger — 
that he had never been in Scotland before — that he 
knew nothing of the usages of the Presbyterian 
Kirk, being of the Church of England, and that she 
should give the morsel to somebody else. The young 
woman was deaf to all his arguments, and held out 
authoritatively the bread and cheese. Thinking prob- 
ably that the lass had not given him credit for what 
he said, he told her, in perfect simplicity, that he 

was the Duke of , and that he had just arrived 

at a hotel which he named. The answer shut his 



2 24- Reminiscences of 

mouth, ' Though you were the king on the throne, 
you maun tak that bread and cheese.' 

" Public baptism was the fashion down till the 
middle of last century, if not later. The chronicles 
of Hamilton hive not failed to record the fact that the 
Duke of Hamilton brought his children to churchy 
like the rest. On two occasions his Grace met an 
honest shoemaker at the baptismal font, and at the 
close of the service kindly remarked to him, ' Friend, 
you and I have luck to meet here.' Before leaving 
this matter, I cannot help observing that there surely 
is a remarkable tendency to the old usage in our own 
day. When I came to Edinburgh, which is now 
about thirty-six years ago, no man of any consider- 
ation in society ever thought of bringing his children 
to church to be baptised, and, of course, many of 
the humbler classes followed their example. This 
made my work often very heavy, from the frequent 
paucity of m.inisters in this neighbourhood. But 
now, without any exhortation on my part, thou2;h I 
never concealed my opinion, the fashion is quite the 
other way. J am never asked to baptise children in 
private. What can be the cause of this change ? 

" 2. Marriage. — Here I would remark, in pass- 
ing, that which I quite share with you, in rendering 
the tribute of gratitude that is due to Mr. Chambers 
for his * Domestic Annals,' and other works. I have 
sometimes thought, however, that he too exclusively 
lays to the door of the Presbyterian party those en- 
actments which he has a right to think unduly severe. 



Scottish Life 8f Character, 21^ 

I can have no doubt that the honest Prelatists fully 
sympathised with what was done by the Presbyterian 
brethren. In fact, 'penny weddings,' and 'lyke- 
wakes,' and other revelries, were as offensive to the 
pious portion of them as they could be to the kindred 
and friends who differed from them in matters of ec- 
clesiastical polity. After the Revolution, till, I think, 
about 1740, there was a rule that any man who in- 
timated a purpose of marriage should deposit with the 
session a certain sum — I forget the amount — be- 
fore the marriage was solemnized. This was called 
in Carmunnock the 'consignation money ; ' in Logie, 
'the pawn.* If there had been any too intimate an- 
tecedent connection between the contracting parties, 
' the pawn ' was forfeited for the benefit of the poor; 
if otherwise, the husband came to the kirk-session 
and claimed it. Thus long did a rule or law keep 
its place, which was established shortly after the Ref- 
ormation. It is easy for us to say now, that moral 
influence should have been used, and not money 
exacted in such a case, but I daresay the good men 
in those sad times did not know how to make the 
people understand the difference between right and 
wrong. The ' penny weddings * were, under the 
colour of kindness to the young married persons, 
little else than an apology for scenes of riot and 
debauchery. They cannot be excused, as they were 
in the old times ; and unless they had been frowned 
on by the Church, they would have been lasting in- 
let3 to sin and profanity. There still are occasionally- 
15 



ZZ^ Reminiscences of 

ill the couiitry ' pay weddings,' but the change of 
name indicates, what is the fact, that these are very 
sober affairs. 

" It may seem strange to say that during a minis- 
try of nearly forty-five years I have had httle trouble 
with what we call ' irregular marriages,' that is, mar- 
riages not celebrated according to ecclesiastical law. 
In one case, the parties had declared their marriage 
before a magistrate ; in the other, they came to us 
(the kirk-session) to own their union. In the latter 
instance we made them sign a declaration that they 
were man and wife. Both parties were rebuked for 
having entered so rashly into married life. Lord 
Braxfield used to say that ^ there was nae part of the 
law of Scotland that needed mair to be made out o* 
hale claith than the law o' marriage.' I have no 
doubt he was right ; but it is satisfactory to know 
that, loose as our marriage law is, any irregularity on 
that head is always counted as discreditable. 

" 3. Deaths and Funerals. — You are aware that 
after a death, the old usage was to watch the body 
till the funeral. The lykewake must have had a 
superstitious origin, but be that as it may, it was 
connected with much profligacy and licentiousness. 
I remember being told by a servant, when very 
young, of the fun, and racketing, and mischief of 
every kind, that took place at the wakes in her early 
days. They were often and earnestly condemned 
by the Church j and as I never heard of them in 
any district with which I have been connected, I 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 227 

thought they had entirely disappeared. But Dr. 
Chalmers told me that they still lingered in Fife at 
the time he left it, and mentioned, among other 
things, a feat performed by a young woman at a 
wake, shortly before his removal from Kilmany, of a 
most revolting character. 

" In Hamilton, in my early days, the mode of inti- 
mating a death, and of inviting to the funeral, was this 
— The town-crier left the house of mourning, and, 
after ringing his bell at various stages, uttered the 
following words : ' Brethren and sisters, I let you to 

wit, that , whause corpse lies at , 

departed this life (then off with his hat), by the will 
of the Almighty (on such a day and hour). You 
are desired to attend his (or her) burial at next warn- 
ing.' Having thus perambulated the town, he re- 
turned to the house, from which, after a reasonable 
time, he re-issued to ring his warning bell. The 
attendance at the funeral was thus made to depend 
on the respect in which the individual was held when 
alive. 

" The appearance and dress of attendants at fun- 
erals shews a decided improvement in the circum- 
stances of the working classes in our days. The 
manse of Dalzell, where I was born, stood beside the 
church-yard, and I used to remark, in those days, 
that at the funerals very few of the attendants had 
other than coloured apparel. I have no doubt that, 
in many cases, the nearest kindred had borrowed the 
mourning dress they wore. 



228 Reminiscences of 

" I never myself witnessed any excess at funerals, 
but that is all I can say. Our Scots chronicles tell 
a sad and a true story on this head for earlier days. 
But it is well we are mending, and that I, for one, 
can say that I leave the world in a hetter state than 
that in which I found it. 

" I must now tell you something of the Beggars 
of my early years. What a different sort of people 
from the class (if they deserve the name) we now 
have among us ! The older beggars were stately 
and self-possessed, and if not always sober, they 
were ever a civil race. They were neither ' Thig- 
gers^ nor sorners, nor masterful beggars.' They got 
what was reasonable, and went on their way. I 
have before mc the image of Jamie Templeton, and 
am saved the trouble of describing his person, for 
he was just another Edie Ochiltree. No sooner did 
he arrive at the manse (Dalzell) than he told the 
servant to inform her mistress that he was in the hall. 
Immediately an audience was granted, and a wel- 
come given, and the gridiron was set on the fire to 
dress something nice. Meanwhile, he sat as an 
independent gentleman, jeering and bantering the 
servant who was cooicing for his behoof. To the 
lady of the house he was always respectful ; for 
he knew his place as well as others of his class. 
At the same time he was frank in telling his 
mind. For instance, ' I have just been in the big 
house (Dalzell House), mem, and got a glass of 
whisky ; I would rather it had been wine.' ' Wine ! 



Scottish Life 8f Character, 229 

Jamie, it's enough to put wine out of fashion when 
the like of you speaks of it.' ' Mem, I could 
take a bottle of wine every day.' But Jamie was 
quite satisfied with his glass of beer at the manse. 

'' Another of the same class made no secret of 
his relish for strong drink. For diversion's sake he 
was once asked, 'John, can ye take a full glass of 
whisky?' Answer, ^ Toot ! a glass of whisky is 
to me. just like a flea in a coal pit. * 

" There was at one time a colony of Gipsies in 
Minstry (parish of Logic), but the race was rapidly 
disappearing when we came to live in it. The 
truth is that they were prosecuted, or what they 
no doubt thought, persecuted, till they left the place. 
These were not of the pure begging type, and had 
not the uprightness of the proper breed. They 
had a plurality of vocations, tinkering, begging, 
stealing, coining, or uttering of base coin, palmestry, 
etc. They were no doubt pests in their day. When 
they took a grudge at any family, it fared ill with 
that house ; yet they were tolerated. I believe the 
people were amused with them ; and I have heard 
the country folks tell with great glee, the daring 
tricks of Nanny Bilson, an amazon of her clan. 
But neither Nanny, nor any of her kindred, ever 
thought of plying all the branches of their calling 
without reserve or exception. For instance, I 
never heard of their cheating the minister^ or steal- 
ing from him. I think there was a touch of super- 
stition that kept them from all that. To him they 



230 Reminiscences of 

came as beggars, having a kind of authority. For 
instance, Nanny met my father, and thus greeted 
him. ' O sir, 1 was in Logie' kirk, the day you 
were baptized, and 1 was in Logie kirk the day 
you were placed, and 1 must have a shiJhng from 
you.' The argument was irresistible. 

" I remember an old woman of the tribe coming 
to a manse on the Monday after the Communion, 
which you know is a sort of Easter among us. 1 
was young, and was anxious to see the issue of her 
visit, being gifted with an undue amount of curios- 
ity, as may well be said. She coolly took her seat 
in the kitchen, and ordered the servant to bring her 
dinner. The servant indignantly refused. With- 
out saying more, the bold wife took the heavy cud- 
gel she held in her hand, and gave three alarming 
knocks on the floor. Enter the other servant in 
a flurry; 'What's wrong?' — 'What's wrong? 
go and tell your mistress that Jenny Robertson is 
here, and wants her dinner.' The dinner was soon 
forthcoming, and when that was disposed of, an- 
other demand came from head quarters — 'I want 
a dram.' Cook, still more indignant than before, 
' A dram ! you'll not get a dram, though it were 
to save vou from choking.' No answer, but a 
double dose of ominous knocks on the floor. Again 
enters Christie, pro secundo. ' Tell your mistress, 
dame, that Jenny Robertson wants a dram.' Dram 
sent, and exit Jenny in triumph, after simply telling 
the cook, ' A' the parish kens Jenny Robertson.' 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 231 

" I cannot leave the matter of the Gipsies, into 
which 1 have been insensibly beguiled, without re- 
cording an anecdote told me by my father regard- 
ing them. In this case a shoe merchant had gone 
to a Kippen fair to dispose of his wares. He was 
soon accosted by a man, who told him that if he 
would follow him, he would take him to a place 
where he would get the better part, if not the whole 
of his shoes disposed of. The bait took, and the 
worthy man soon found himself in a company, the 
character of which was obvious to him at first sight. 
They began talking in a gibberish, not one word of 
which he understood. He saw his case was all but 
desperate, but being something of a pawky Scot, did 
not altogether lose heart. Watching his time, he 
heard one of his strange associates utter the name 
' Marshale.'' Now he put in his word, by mention- 
ing that his mother was ' a Marshall.' The effect 
was to him astounding. A debate arose ; one man 
took the lead. At first he was calm and firm. 
Then the discussion waxed warmer : flashing eyes, 
clenched fists, and the hard sounds of angry gibber- 
ish. Still the leader kept his ground, and after a 
time gave a signal to the shoe merchant to follow 
him. When he was safely out of the house, he bade 
him ' good day ; ' simply adding that his name was 
'Marshall.' 

"You must forgive me for this melange — I began 
this portion without ' heads,' and a Scotch ministei 
who does that is very apt to get into confusion. So, 



232 Reminiscences of 

without farther apology for abruptness, I must now 
say something of old servants. Alas ! the race Is 
nearly extinct. I know, indeed, of one who still 
speaks of 'our house, our horses, and our property,' 
but he is a rare plant. There is no longer what you 
have already so graphically described as the result of 
lono; service and mutual confidence. Here are some 
specimens which I had from Lady Stuart. 

" Colonel Erskine, the father of the celebrated 
lawyer, and the grandfather of Dr. John Eiskine of 
this city, no less celebrated as a divine, was quite a 
character in his day. You have rather a racy anec- 
dote of him in Sir Henry Moncreiff's ' Life of Dr. 
J. Erskine.' ^ He had an old servant of the true 

1 The anecdote referred to by Dr. Clason, illustrative of 
Colonel Er^kine's choleric disposition, will be found at p. 488 
of Sir n. Moncreiff's '" Life of his Grandson, Dr. ErsKine." 
The Colonel, during the last ten or twelve years of his life, 
suffered from asthma, the attacks of which he bore wi^h great 
impatience. When suffering from his complaint the magistrates 
of Culross, where he resided, were burning kelp on the shore 
immediately below his residence. Imagining that his com- 
plaint was irritated by the smoke of the kelp, he sent peremp- 
tory orders to put out the fires. The magistrates were not dis- 
posed to submit. Too much provoked to consider either their 
lights or his own, he resolved to extinguish the fires with his own 
hand. Unable to walk, he mounted his horse, and made his 
grandson (the subject of this narrative, who was then at his house, 
a youth about the age of fourteen) march before him along the 
steep descent of the street of Culross, with his grandfather's 
sword drawn in his hand — a circumstance which, to those who 
were afterwards acquainted with the venerable figure of Dr. 



Scottish Life ^ Character, 233 

caste. On one occasion he had done something that 
very much displeased his master. The Colonel's 
wr.ith became quite uncontrollable, his utteraiice was 
choked, and his countenance became pale as death. 
The servant grev/ somewhat uneasy, and at last 
said, ' Eh ! sir, maybe an aith would relieve you.' 

'' By the bye. Lady Stuart told me an anecdote 
of the early life of Dr. Erskine, which is worthy 
of being recorded, among lighter things. His aunt 
was the second wife of the lawyer, but not the 
mother of the Doctor. She observed that every 
morning the young boy came into her dressing 
room, and went into a closet in which sweetmeats 
were kept. Naturally enough her thought was 
that he came to pick up any thing palatable that 
he could find ; but his visits were so regubr, and 
he made so little noise, that her wonder was, what 

Erskine, must present a very singular picture. The magis- 
trates, not willing to acquiesce in the Coloners encroachment 
on their privileges, assembled their retainers, and tai:ly took 
him and his grandson prisoners. His passion had soon suffi- 
ciently subsided to enable him to address the magistrates in the 
following terms: — "This is all nonsense, gentlemen, and we 
are all in the wrong; come along to the inn, and we shall all 
dine together and forget this folly." They accompanied him 
without hesitation. He treated them with the best dinner the 
nn afforded, and the afternoon was spent in perfect good hu- 
mour and cordiality. On this occasion the irritability of his 
temper brought him Into a situation sufficiently ridiculous ; but 
as soon as the opposition which he met with gave fair play to 
his understanding, his passion, as usual, subsided as quickly as 
t had risen. 



234 Reminiscences vf 

he could be about. She looked in one morning 
and found him on his knees, in close communion 
with God ! 

"Sir Michael S. Stuart (the ^ Sir Michael' of 
his day, and I suppose the great-grandfather of the 
present public-spirited baronet of the same name) 
had an old servant who had spent his life in his 
house. Peter was faithful, and I believe religious. 
When he was seized with his last illness, he sent 
for his master to tell him he was dying. ' Well, 
Peter, I am sure you are not afraid to die. You 
have been a faithful servant, and in every respect 
good.' The answer was — 'Ah, Sir Michael, it's 
little ye ken. There are mony whaups in the raip 
in sinty (seventy) lang years, and the warst o't a' 
is that we forget them — forget our sins, but (point- 
ing to the heavens) they are a' marked down yon- 
der. Sir Michael.' 

" By the time I came to the parish, most of the 
old servants at Castlemilk were gone, but there 
were some note-worthy in my younger days. Saun- 
ders Denholm had been servant, I believe, all his 
days in the house. He used to boast that but for 
the Bar Sinister that was on his shield, he would 
have been laird of Coltness. Nevertheless, he 
counted not a little on his pedigree, and was quite 
the major-domo. Like others, he had his favour- 
ites, and took care to tell them when there was 
anything good in the house. If a glass of water 
was asked for, the significant hint was given, ' we 
have famous beer just now.' 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 235 

" Saunders, however, had his failing — the Scotch 
failing — and when he was in his cups was sure to 
quarrel with Lady Stuart. He gave up his place, 
and was going immediately ' to Kilbride.' No mor- 
tal could ever tell why he fixed on that place as his 
future residence, for he had been in no way connec- 
ted with it through life. ' I'm awa' to Kilbride, 
my lady.* ' Very well, be quick.' ' Pm awa' to 
Kilbride.' ' Ou, are ye no awa' yet?' The door 
opens for the third time — ' Noo mind, it's a' your 
wyte.' ' Ou ay, it's a' my wyte.' The tears of 
penitence and humble confession came in the morn- 
ing. The old labourers about the place would have 
been denied the privilege of the entre by the domes- 
tics, but, happily for them, there was a back stair 
that lent its influence in their favour. A gentle 
tap is heard at the side door, and, with permission, 
enters Willie Shearer. — ' Ou, my lady, Pve just 
come to speir for you, as I heard that you had been 
ailing.' Willie gets a kind word and a dram. But 
I need not say more on this head. The gentry of 
the former generation lived so much at home, and 
in the midst of their people, that if you describe 
one of the genuine school you have the whole. 

" I must say very little of the beadles (betherals), 
for I have the fear of your critics before me. It is 
quite true that ' cadgers maun aye be crackin' o' 
crusts,' but I have really very little to say of these 
worthies. 

" From what I observed after our settlement at 



236 Reminiscences of 

Logic, it appeared that the beadle had civil as well 
as ecclesiastical duties assigned to him in old times. 
For instance, at the close of" the morning service, Da- 
vid White stands at the top of the bell-loft stair, and 
intimates to the following effect: — 'Notice! Ony 
person griipp:t ^ shearing gerse up and down Sir Rob- 
ert's parks (Sir R. Abercromby*s), will be poonished 
as far as laa* will alloo.' Such intimations were often 
made. At another place of worship I heard two 
thundering 'notices.' The second was, 'Also some 
of ye brack the leg o' a sheep yesterday on the Blair 
Hill. If ony o' ye will tell me wha did it, he will 
be handsomely rewarded.' I have no doubt that 
roups were often advertised in the same way at an 
earlier period ; for pretty long on in last century, a 
market, or little fair, was held at Tullibody after 
church hours every Lord's day. 

" The above-named ' DaviJ ' was succeeded by a 
man who needed no civil pov/er to bolster up his dig- 
nity. He was another P. P. His duty, he seemed 
to think, was to rule in all things ecclesiastical. 
Once installed, he got a long pole to poke up the 
sleepers, he rebuked any stranger minister who was 
late, and at last he intimated his resignation of office, 
on the ground that ' they had not enough of work 
for him.* He ivas grave-digger ! To his utter amaze- 
ment his resignation was immediately and indignant- 
ly accepted. Poor man! it was a mistake. Fie meant 
what he did as a first step in a process of augmenta- 

1 Detected. 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 237 

tion, but was very unfortunate in the choice of his 
counsel. 

" Positively only one more beadle anecdote. The 
officer who exercised this calling at Falkirk was a 
character in his day. In the town there lived a very 
notorious infidel, who gloried in profanity. On one 
occasion he was denouncing the absurdity of the 
doctrine of original sin. The betheral thought him- 
self ofificially bound to put in his word, although the 
other was his superior. ' Mr. H., it seems to me 
that you needna fash yoursel' about original sin, for 
to my certain knowledge you have as much akwal 
(actual) sin as will do your business.' ^ 

*' 1 am much inclined, as I have pen in hand, to 
invite the attention of your correspondents to the 
dearth of which I have a recollection as taking place 
at the beginning of the present century. My remin- 
iscences of that visitation are necessarily very slen- 
der. We were at that time living in a secluded manse 
on the banks of the Clyde. Our intercourse with 
the neiii,hbourino; villa^ies was as nothing;. We were 
young and thoughtless, but we could not fail to be 
affected by the deep seriousness of our parents at that 
solemn time. It was not the clamorous poor that suf- 
fered, it was the higher class, that seek iheir subsist- 

1 To this anecdote of good Dr. Clason's I feel disposed to 
add the remark, that I think it would be difficult to give an 
example of a more telling personal argument in a thjological 
controversy. 

E. B. R. 



238 Reminiscences of 

ence by their own exertions. I remember hearing, 
or rather overhearing, of a case of this kind. A very 
active and industrious woman shewed symptoms of 
being in want. Her neighbours saw want in her 
face ; they watched her, and she was only detected 
when she was found gathering docks and such gar- 
bage on the roadside to boil for her sustenance. She 
was challenged, and confessed that she had not tasted 
anything for two days. 1 make no reflection. ''Tis 
sixty years ago,' and yet my heart swells in the re- 
membrance of this incident. 

' Scotland, with all thy faults, I love thee still.' 

My mother told me afterwards that there were many 
whose constitutions never recovered the shock they 
suffered during these dreadful years. It was God's 
rebuke. The year 1801 brought peace and a singu- 
larly plentiful harvest, and then the land sung ^ of 
mercy and judgment.' Older men will be able to 
give you far more ample and instructive material^ on 
this matter, and I would willingly invite them to do 
so. 

"The disgusting details of the boxing match which 
lately took place between Sayers and Heenan have 
recalled some Scottish and local reminiscences of 
bygone scenes connected with pugilistic encounters, 
in which, I need hardly say, I had no personal con- 
cern. 

" Boxing matches were dying out when I entered 
into life. I remember two men between whom there 



Scott I. ^h Life Sf Character. 239 

was a bitter feud, and it was a certain and settled 
thing that if they met each other at fair or market, 
there must be a battle. We now live in more peace- 
ful times. But it was not so in former days, say from 
the beginning till the middle of last century. Then 
at fairs there were not only invitations to individual 
conflict, but the youth of adjoining parishes chal- 
lenged each other to a battle with cudgels or fists. 

*' Thus Logie was called out — 

* Hey the gutters, and how the gutters, and hey the gutters 
o' Logic.' 

This was a reproachful allusion to the miry roads and 
clayey soil of the parish, as if to insinuate that the 
people were as soft as the soil they daily trode on. 

" Douglas, Duke of Hamilton, who died about 
the close of last century, was a great patron of pugil- 
ism, and took pains for instructing the young men in 
Hamilton in the art, if so disposed. But he soon 
found that there was no need of any patronage of his 
to promote that branch of science. He brought 
down from London, Mendoza, a celebrated bruiser 
of his day, who challenged any one in the county 
to the conflict. The challenge was accepted by a 
young tenant of his Grace's, James Bocham (Beau- 
champ (?), of course) of Clydesmill. At the first on- 
slaught, James knocked in all his antagonist's guards, 
broke two of his ribs, and having thus summarily set- 
tled the matter, he turned to the Duke and asked, 
* Has your Grace ony mair o' thae Mendoza bodies.' 

" 1 scarcely know what place to assign to the fol 



240 Reminiscences of 

lowing, as it would not come in among ' anecdotes 
of old servants.' A notable lady (oF Edinburgh I 
suppose), had long been annoyed and fretted by her 
town servants, and beino; no lono;er able to bear 
their manifold tricks and malpractices, she intimated 
to her friends her purpose of getting an unsophis- 
ticated girl from the country, whom she could train 
to her mind. And she was fortunate enough in 
securing a young woman from a remote corner of 
the land, thoroughly recommended for activity, hon- 
esty, and good nature. How the process of train- 
ing went on, you may judge from the following 
specimen. The girl having seen something very 
wonderful going on in the street, in a tone of un- 
sophisticated familiarity, called to her mistress. 'Eh I 
woman, come here and see this,' * Woman ! do 
you presume to call me woman ? ' ^ Jy — if ye're 
no a woman, what are ye? Are ye a Speeritf 

" In taking a retrospect of the habits of the 
Scottish people, say sixty years ago, it is impos- 
sible to overlook the noxious influence that smug- 
glers and smuggling had in the way of promoting 
intemperance and kindred evils. I can speak of 
this with some confidence, because the parish of 
Logie, to which allusion has so often been made, 
was one of the highways between the Highlands 
and Lowlands on which the illicit trade was car- 
ried o[u A smugcrler who was a total abstainer 
was never heard of, but much was said to the con- 
trary of the men as a class. They sought and won 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 24 1 

the favour and co-operation of the people to an in- 
credible extent by the free distribution of whisky, 
and by their bold, adventurous character. To this 
WG must add that, ov^ing to the very impolitic ex- 
cise lau^s by u'hich the licensed distilleries were 
then regulated, the spirits they dealt in were so 
superior that the very great majority of the parish- 
ioners, it is believed, gave them encouragement by 
purchasing in some way or other their contraband 
goods. There were, however, a itw who, on con- 
scientious grounds, gave them no countenance of 
any kind, and there were good reasons for this. Ir- 
respective altogether of their calling, they were a 
lawless race. They were bad grammarians, for 
they had little understanding of the difference be- 
tween ' meum and tuum.' Attendance on public 
worship they could not give, for the Lord's day 
was the time of their most active work, and you 
can easily understand the results of bold irreligion. 
They were men of violence, and if not of blood 
in the strict sense, there is reason to apprehend 
that they were only kept from that by fear of the 
consequences. I have said that they had to a large 
extent the popular favour, and I could point out a 
village where an exciseman who had arrested a 
smuggler was so beset by the women of the place 
that he was with difficulty rescued out of their 
hands by the smuggler himself. I have only glanced 
at a strange chapter of history, leaving this and 
many other things to be enlarged on by other cor- 



242 Reminiscences of 

respondents. It is a strange thing that the eyes of 
the Legislature were never opened till the smugglers 
waxed so bold as to form themselves into armed 
bands of twenty or thirty, carrying on their calling 
in the light of day. Then it was that they lost all 
favour with the people, and soon the remedy was 
applied that rooted out smuggling from the parish 
and district. 

" The demolition of the old church of Dalzell has 
already been alluded to, as indicating the ruthless dis- 
regard of ancient architectural remains that prevailed 
in our own early days. The like charge cannot be 
brought against the landowners of Logie, The 
church was old, and had become ruinous ; it had 
never been an elegant structure, but its position was 
exquisitely beautiful, and it is to be regretted that 
the eastern window was not preserved when the 
main part of the fabric was demolished, not that 
there was anything worth notice in its tracery, but 
for reasons that will readily occur to any one who 
has been on the ground. We are in our day rather 
too fond of heaping reproaches on Knox and his fol- 
lowers, as if they alone were chargeable with the 
crime of demolishing cathedrals and monasteries, and 
as if they had spent their whole days and strength in 
nought but this atrocious work. It is to be hoped 
that the day is not far distant when the world will 
cease to give implicit faith to such really unfair rep- 
resentations. For instance, every one must regret 
the ruinous state of Dunblane Cathedral, and I at 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 243 

one time held the antiquarian creed that this was to 
be ascribed to the fire and fury of the Reformation. 
A former minister of the parish — a man intelligent, 
and in every respect trustworthy, and connected with 
the place by hereditary ties — assured me that its 
dilapidated state was due to Montrose and his army, 
who had unroofed the fabric for the sake of the lead 
and timber. 

" I would add here a curious reminiscence of cler^ 
teal peculiarity. In the beginning of the present 
century an old minister died, who had been for 
nearly forty years incumbent of the parish of Logie. 
Many anecdotes have been told of his oddities and 
eccentricities, but considerations of a personal na- 
ture, of which you are aware, would have prevented 
me from recording any of them, even if it were con- 
sistent with the theory I have formed of the object 
of your work that I should do so. There can, how- 
ever, be no impropriety in stating that he was a firm 
believer in witchcraft^ that he was wont to tell his 
congregation of his controversies with the Evil One, 
of their frequent dialogues, detailing the substance of 
them. He used to describe the various orders and 
descriptions of evil spirits that haunted the rocks ad- 
jacent to the church. His belief in these things was 
so firm, that though unquestionably a pious man, 
they often gave him great distress. 

" Any one who can look back on the state of 
things as they were sixty years ago cannot but con- 
gratulate himself on the happy change with respect 



244 Reminiscences of 

to intemperance which has taken place in our day 
among our countrymen. Of this Lord Cockburn 
has given us striking illustrations. A host would, 
I suppose, now feel somewhat affronted if any of 
his guests would shew symptoms of excess. How 
different from the old times, when such excesses 
were honoured, and considered a proof and mark of 
hospitality. Too often, alas ! the father compelled 
his son, perhaps a boy of seventeen or eighteen, to 
drink, to drink ' fair,' or else incur the penalty of 
leaving the company. Nay, at every party there 
was a risk of individuals being present who had a 
plot on some unsuspecting victim. The practice 
of toasts^ no doubt, aided such unworthy designs. It 
could tend to no good, perhaps the reverse, to record 
the many anecdotes that have been told in connec- 
tion with these scenes of revelry. But something 
remains yet to be told of the injurious influence, in 
this particular, of encouraging intemperance, that 
the higher classes exercised over their humbler neigh- 
bours. The gentry of this country remained much 
at home during last century, their houses were main- 
ly supplied with provisions of various kinds from 
their own tenantry or the neighbourhood, and this 
led to frequent adjournments to the public-house of 
the village. Then they were not over nice in their 
amusements ; for instance, cock-fighting, and others 
even less creditable. They brought together multi- 
tudes of heedless and worthless persons, who ten- 
dered their services to the various combatants, and 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 245 

the issue of the conflict ended in a carousal, in 
which, in a bad sense, ' the rich and the poor met 
together.' We must not, however, deal out to the 
old warm-hearted aristocracy harder measure than 
they deserved. For it must be owned that, irrespec- 
tive of influence and example from high quarters, 
there was amongst our countrymen, even on the part 
of those who were not themselves addicted in any 
way to intemperance, a feeling that hard drinking 
was a manly attainment, and, at any rate, a disposi- 
tion to regard such excesses with too much indul- 
gence. You have yourself furnished one such in- 
stance, and many more might be added.'* 



A correspondent kindly sends me from Aberdeen- 
shire a humorous story, very much of the same sort 
as that of Colonel Erskine's servant, who consider- 
ately suggested to his master that " maybe an aith 
might relieve him," related above, (p. 233,) by Dr. 
Clason. My correspondent heard the story from the 
late Bishop Skinner. 

It was among the experiences of his father. Bishop 
yohn Skinner, while making some pastoral visits in 
the neighbourhood of the town (Aberdeen), the 
Bishop took occasion to step into the cottage of two 
humble parishioners, a man and his wife, who culti- 
vated a little croft. No one was within ; but as the 
door was only on the latch, the Bishop knew that the 
Worthy couple could not be far distant. He therefore 



246 Reminiscences of 

stepped in the direction of the out-houses, and found 
them both in the barn winnowing corn, in the prim- 
itive way, with " riddles,^' betwixt two open doors. 
On the Bishop making his appearance, the honest 
man surceased his winnowing operations, and in the 
gladness of his heart stepped briskly forward to wel- 
come his pastor; but in his haste he trod upon the rim 
of the riddle, which rebounded with great force against 
one of his shins. The accident made him suddenly 
pull up ; and, instead of completing the reception, he 
stood vigorously rubbing the injured limb ; and, not 
daring in such a venerable presence to give vent to 
the customary strong ejaculations, kept twisting his 
face into all sorts of grimaces. As was natural, the 
Bishop went forward, uttering the usual formulas of 
condolence and sympathy, the patient, meanwhile, 
continuing his rubbings and his silent but expressive 
contortions. At last Janet came to the rescue ; and, 
clapping the Bishop coaxingly on the back, said, 
" Noo, Bishop, jist gang ye yir waas in to the hoose, 
an' we'll follow fan he's had time to curse a fyllie, an' 
I'se warran' he'll seen be weel eneuch ! " 

Now, when we linger over these old stories, we 
seem to live at another period, and in such reminis- 
cences we converse with a generation different from 
our own. Changes are still going on around us. 
They have been going on for some time past. The 
changes are less striking as society advances, and our 
later years have less and less alterations to remark. 
Probably each generation will have fewer changes to 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 247 

record than the generation that preceded ; still every 
one who is tolerably advanced in life must feel that, 
comparing its beginning Snd its close, he has wit- 
nessed two epochs, and that he looks on a different 
world from one which he can remember. To eluci- 
date this fact has been my present object, and in at- 
tempting this task I cannot but feel how trifling and 
unsatisfactory my remarks must seem to many who 
have a more enlarged and minute acquaintance with 
Scottish life and manners than I have. But I shall 
be encouraged to hope for a favourable, or at least an 
indulgent sentence upon these Reminiscences, if to 
any of my readers I shall have opened a fresh insight 
into the subject of social changes amongst us. Many 
causes have their effects upon the habits and customs 
of mankind, and of late years such causes have been 
greatly multiplied in number and activity. In many 
persons, and in some who have not altogether lost 
their national partialities, there is a general tendency 
to merge Scottish usages and Scottish expressions into 
the English forms, as being more correct and genteel. 
The facilities for moving, not merely from place to 
place in our own country, but from one country to 
another, the spread of knowledge and information 
by means of periodical publications and newspapers, 
and the incredibly low prices at which literary works 
are produced, must have great effects. Then there 
is the improved taste in art, which, together with 
literature, has been taken up by young men who, 
fifty, sixty, seventy years ago, or more, would have 



248 Reminiscences of 

known no such sources of interest, or, indeed, who 
would have looked upon them as unmanly and 
eJfFeminate. When first these pursuits were taken 
up by our Scottish young men, they excited in the 
north much amazement, and, I fear, contempt, as 
was evinced by a laird of the old school, who, the 
first time he saw a young man at the pianoforte, 
asked, with evident disgust, *' Can the creature sew 
ony ? " evidently putting the accomplishment of 
playing the pianoforte and the accomplishment of the 
needle in the same category. The greater facility 
of producing books, prints, and other articles which 
tend to the comfort and embellishment of domestic 
life, must have considerable influence upon the 
habits and tastes of a people. I have often thought 
how much effect mi2:ht be traced to the sino-le cir- 

o o 

cumstance of the cheap production of pianofortes. 
An increased facility of procuring the means of ac- 
quaintance with good works of art and literature, 
acts both as cause and effect. A growing and im- 
proved taste tends to stimulate the production of the 
best works of art. These, in return, foster and 
advance the power of forming a due estimate of art. 
In the higher department of music, for example, the 
cheap rate of hearing compositions of the first class, 
and of possessing the works of the most eminent 
composers, must have had influence upon thousands. 
The principal oratorios of Handel may be purchased 
for as many shillings each as they cost pounds years 
ago. Indeed, at that time the very names of those 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 249 

immortal works were known only to a ^qw who 
were skilled to appreciate their high beauties. Now 
associations are formed for practising and studying 
the choral works of the great masters. In connec- 
tion, however, with this subject, I may notice here 
that a taste for that most interesting style of music, 
the pure Scottish, is in some quarters becoming a 
matter of reminiscence. Of reminiscence I mean 
so far as concerns the enthusiasm with which it was 
once esteemed and cultivated amongst us. I do 
not speak so much of the songs of Scotland, which 
can never lose their charm, although of them even 
some are growing fast out of the acquaintance of 
the younger members of society ; but I refer more 
particularly to the reels and strathspeys, which with 
many Scotch persons have become nearly quite ob- 
solete. When properly performed, it is a most 
animating and delightful strain — not of a refined or 
scientific class, but joyous and inspiriting. It has a 
peculiar character of its own, and requires to be 
performed with a particular and spicy dexterity of 
hand, whether for the bow or the keys. Accord- 
ingly, young ladies used to take lessons in it as a 
finish to their musical education. Such teaching 
would now, I fear, be treated with contempt by 
many of our modern fair ones. I recollect at the 
beginning of the present century, my eldest sister, 
who was a good musician of the school of Pleyel, 
Kozeluch, Clementi, etc., having such lessons from 
Nathaniel Gow, a celebrated reel and strathspey 



250 Reminiscences of 

performer. Nathaniel was the son of Neil Gow, 
who was the most eminent performer and composer 
of the pure Scottish dance music. A correspond- 
ent, who knew Neil Gow, and was inquiring after 
him at his cottage the day of his death, in 1807, 
has kindly communicated a characteristic anec- 
dote : — Neil was rather addicted to the whisky 
bottle. On walking home to Dunkeld, one night, 
from Perth^ where he had been engaged, as usual, 
to play the violin at some ball, upon being asked, 
next day, how he had got home, for it was a long 
walk, and he was very tipsy, replied, " that he didna 
mind the length o' the road ; it was the breadth 6* 
it that he cast oot wi' ! " — under the recollection of 
his having knocked about from side to side. At 
the close of the last century Neil's celebrity might 
be said to rival that of Burns ; and Neil's strath- 
speys were on a par with the songs of Robby. But 
alas ! that celebrity and popularity are becoming 
matters of reminiscence with the itw. With the 
rising generation the name has passed away. It is 
a pity. Even still, let a good strathspey performer 
begin to play such tunes, for example, as " Up an' 
Waur them a^ Willie," " Brig o' Dee," " Reel o' 
Tulloch," " Loch Eric Side," or " Monimusk," 
and every countenance bri2;htens with animation. 

We must acknowledge that the love of Scottish 
music used to be with some of the older generation 
a very exclusive taste, and that they had as httle sym- 
pathy with the admirers of Italian strains as such 



Scottish Life S^ Character, 251 

admirers could have with theirs. I have been sup- 
pHed with an amusing illustration of this intolerance 
— A family belonging to the Scottish Border, after 
spending some time at Florence, had returned home, 
and proud of the progress they had made in music, 
the young ladies were anxious to shew off their ac- 
complishments before an old confidential servant of 
the family, and accordino;ly sung to her some of theii 
finest Italian songs which they had learned abroad. 
Instead, however, of paying them a compliment on 
their performance, she shewed what she thought of 
it by asking with much naivete, " Eh, mem, do they 
ca' skirling like yon singing in foreign parts ? " 

There are many causes in operation to produce 
changes in taste, habits, and associations, amongst 
us. Families do not vegetate for years in one retired 
spot as they used to do ; young men are encouraged 
to attain accomplishments, and to have other sources 
of interest than the field or the bottle. Every one 
knows, or may know, everything that is going on 
through the whole world. There is a tendency in 
mankind to lose all that is peculiar, and in nations to 
part with all that distinguishes them from each other. 
We hear of wonderful changes in habits and customs 
where change seemed impossible. In India and Tur- 
key even, peculiarities and prejudices are fading away 
under the influence of time. Amongst ourselves, no 
doubt, one circumstance tended greatly to call forth, 
and, as we may say, to develope^ the peculiar Scotch 
humour of which we speak — and that was the ^a- 



252 Reminiscences of 

miliarity of Intercourse which took place between 
persons in different positions of life. This extended 
even to an occasional interchange of words between 
the minister and the members of his flock during 
time of service. I have two anecdotes in illustration 
of this fact, which I have reason to believe are quite 
authentic. In the church of Banchory on Deeside, 
to which I have referred, a former minister always 
preached without book, and being of an absent dis- 
position, he sometimes forgot the head of discourse 
on which he was engaged, and got involved in con- 
fusion. On one occasion, being desirous of recalling 
to his memory the division of his subject, he called 
out to one of his elders, a farmer on the estate of 
Ley, "Bush! (the name of his farm) Bush, ye Ve 
sleeping." " Na, sir, Pm no sleeping — I'm listen- 
ing." " Weel then, what had I begun to say ? " " O, 
ye were saying so and so.'* This was enough, and 
supplied the minister with the thread of his discourse ; 
and he went on. The other anecdote related to the 
parish of Cumbernauld, the minister of which was, at 
the time referred to, noted for a very disjointed and 
rambling style of preaching, without method or con- 
nection. His principal heritor was the Lord Elphin- 
stone of the time, and unfortunately the minister 
and the peer were not on good terms, and always 
ready to annoy each other by sharp sayings or other- 
wise. The minister on one occasion had somewhat 
in this spirit called upon the beadle to " wauken 
my Lord Elphinstone," upon which Lord E. said, 



Scottish Life 8^ Character. 253 

'^ I'm no sleeping, minister." " Indeed you were, 
my lord." He again disclaimed the sleeping. So 
as a test the preacher asked him, " What had I been 
saying last then ? " " Oh just wauken Lord Elphin- 
stone." " Ay, but what did I say before that ? " 
" Indeed," retorted Lord Elphinstone, " I'll gie ye a 
guinea if ye'il tell that yersell, minister." We can- 
not imagine the possibility of such scenes taking place 
amongst us now. It seems as if all men were gradu- 
ally approximating to a common type or form in their 
manners and views of life ; oddities are sunk, prom- 
inences are rounded ofF, sharp features are polished, 
and all is becomino- amongst us smooth and conven- 
tional. The remark, like the effect, is general, and ex- 
tends to other countries as well as to our own. But 
as we have more recently had our peculiarities of 
dialect, oddity, and eccentricity, it becomes the more 
amusing to mark our participation in this change, be- 
cause a period of fifty years shews here a greater con- 
trast than the same period would shew in most other 
localities. 

In my early days we all regularly attended the 
Established Church at Fettercairn. In the rural 
churches in those times a custom prevailed which I 
suppose has now generally gone out — at least it has 
done so in my country: — After the blessing had 
been delivered, the minister invariably turned to the 
heritors, who always occupied the front seats of the 
gallery, and made low bows to each family. An- 
other custom I recollect : — When the text had been 



254 Reminiscences of 

given out, it was usual for the elder branches of the 
congregation to hand about their bibles amongst the 
younger members, marking the place, and calling 
their attention to the passage. During service 
another handing about was frequent amongst the 
seniors, and that was a circulation of the sneeshin 
mull or snufF-box. Indeed, I have heard of the 
same practice in an episcopal church, and particularly 
in one case of an ordination, where the bishop took 
his pinch of snufFand handed the mull to go round 
amongst the clergy assembled for the solemn oc- 
casion within the altar rails. At an earlier date 
than that of which I speak, a custom generally pre 
vailed, which, however, has now become only tradi- 
tionary — I mean the hour-glass affixed to the pulpit, 
to regulate the length of the sermon. 

In the " Scotsman" newspaper of November 7, 
1859, there occurs the following notice of the pres- 
ervation of one of those ancient portions of church 
furniture — " A sand-glass for marking time having 
been seen in the Established Church, of a parish 
near Perth, a gentleman residing near Dundee sent 
to the clergyman, requesting particulars about it, and 
received in reply the following account of its pur- 
pose and uses : — ' Our sand-glass is a relic of an- 
tiquity. There used to be one in every church in the 
olden time. Their use was to regulate the length 
of the long-winded orations with which the minis- 
ters of those days were wont to favour their hearers. 
Watches were not so common then as now j and, 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 255 

as the sermons were not written, the preachers, 
when once set a-going, did not know when to stop 
without some seasonable monition. With a view 
to this, a sand-glass was erected on a stand in front 
of the precentor's desk, so as to be seen both by 
minister and people. When the sand ran out, the 
precentor, whose duty it was to attend to it, held it 
up in front of the minister, to let him know how 
the time was passing. I found our glass among 
some lumber, along with the tent which was used 
at the tent preachings or " Holy Fairs," and got it 
restored to its ancient position as a curiosity. The 
stand is rather tastefully made of thin iron plates, and 
I thought it a pity it should be allowed to fall aside.' " 
Amongst " reminiscences " wh-ich do not extend 
so far back as sand-glasses, we may mention the 
disappearance of Trinity Church in Edinburgh, 
which has taken place within the last fifteen years. 
It was founded by Mary of Gueldres, queen of 
James II. of Scotland, in 1446, and liberally en- 
dowed for a provost, prebendaries, choristers, etc. 
It was never completed, but the portions built, viz., 
choir, transept, and central tower, were amongst 
the finest specimens of later Gothic work in Scot- 
land. The pious founder had placed it at the east 
end of what was then the North Loch. Like 
Lady Glenorchy, she chose her own church for the 
resting-place of her remains as a sanctuary of safety 
and repose. A railway parliamentary bill, however, 
overrides founders' intentions and Episcopal conse- 



256 Rtminiscences of 

cratlons. Where once stood the beautiful church 
of the Holy Trinity, where once the " pealing or- 
gan " and the " full voiced choir" were daily^ heard 
"in service high and anthems clear" — where for 
400 years slept the ashes of a Scottish Queen, now 
resound the noise and turmoil of a railway station. 
In our reminiscences of many changes^ which 
have taken place during fifty years in Scottish 
manners, it might form an interesting section to 
record some of the peculiarities which remain. I 
mean such peculiarities as yet linger amongst us, 
and still mark a difference in some of our social 
habits from those of England. Some Scottish 
usages die hard, and are found here and there- for 
the amusement of southern visitors. To give a ^qw 
examples, persons still persist among us in calling 
the head of the family, or the host, the landlord^ 
although he never charged his guests a halfpenny 
for the hospitality he exercises. In games, golf 
and curling still continue to mark the national 
character — cricket was long an exotic amongst us. 
In many of our educational institutions, however, it 
seems now fairly to have taken root. We continue 
to call our reception rooms ''^public rooms," although 
never used for any but domestic purposes. Military 
rank is attached to ladies, as we speak of Mrs. 
Captain Scott, Mrs. Major Smith. ^ On the occasion 

1 I am assured by a correspondent that such is the custom in 
some parts of England. It may be for the higher ranks of 
general and colonel, but I hardly think they ever speak in 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 257 

of a death, we persist in sending circular notices to 
all the relatives, whether they know of it or not — 
a custom which, together with men wearing weepers 
at funeral solemnities, is unknown in England. An- 
nouncing a married lady's death under her maiden 
name must seem strange to English ears, — as, for ex- 
ample, we read of the demise of Jane Dixon, spouse 
of Thomas Morison. Scottish cookery retains its 
ground, and hotch-potch, minced collops, sheep's head 
singed, and occasionally haggis, are still marked pecu- 
liarities of the Scottish table. These social differ- 
ences linger amongst us. But stronger points are worn 
away, eccentricities and oddities such as existed once 
will not do now. One does not see why eccentricity 
should be more developed in one age than in another, 
but we cannot avoid the conclusion that the day for 
real oddities is no more. Professors of colleges are 
those in whom one least expects it — grave and 
learned characters, and yet such have been in former 
times. We can scarcely now imagine such professors 
as we read of in a past generation. Take the case 
of no less distinguished a person than Adam Smith, 
author of the " Wealth of Nations," who went about 
the streets talking and lau2:hin» to himself in such a 
manner as to make the market women think he was 
deranged ; and he told of one himself who ejaculated 
as he passed, " Hech sirs, and he is weel pat on, 

P^ngland of Mrs. Lieutenant Munro or Mrs. Ensign Paterson, 
as useil to be the custom in Scotch country towns, and may be 
so still. 

17 



258 Reminiscences of 

too ! " expressing surprise that a decided lunatic, 
who from his dress appeared to be a gentleman, 
should be permitted to walk abroad. Professors still 
have their crotchets like other people; but we can 
scarcely conceive a professor of our day coming out 
like Adam Smith to have fish-wives making such 
observations on his demeanour. Of these changes 
there are many which the dignified muse of history 
will scarcely condescend to record or notice. Per- 
haps some changes are better described in idle gossip 
like this than by the historic page ; and this made 
me remark, as an introduction to the record of these 
anecdotes, that personal recollections and reminiscen- 
ces might be extremely valuable in describing those 
lighter variations of society which do not come prop- 
erly within the scope of history. For instance, the 
story told in Lockhart's " Life of Sir W. Scott," of the 
blacksmith whom Sir Walter had formerly known as 
a horse doctor, and whom he found at a small coun- 
try town south of the Border, practising medicine 
with a reckless use of " laudamy and calomy," apol- 
ogizing at the same time for the mischief he might 
do, by the assurance that it " would be lang before it 
made up for Flodden," most graphically describes the 
interest felt by Scotchmen of his rank in the inci- 
dents of their national history. A similar example 
has been recorded in connection with Bannockburn. 
Two English gentlemen visited the field of that 
great battle, and a country blacksmith pointed out 
with much intelligence the positions of the two 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 259 

armies, the stone on which was fixed the Bruce's 
standard, etc. The gentlemen, on leaving, pressed 
his acceptance of a crown piece. " Na, na,'' re- 
plied the Scotsman, with much pride, " it has cost 
ye eneuch already." Such an example of self-denial 
on the part of a Scottish cicerone is, we fear, now 
entirely a " reminiscence." 

In further illustration of these remarks, we may 
refer to the bearing of some old-fashioned language 
upon past national historical connections. Thus, 
from some words which are quite domesticated 
throughout Scotland, we learn how close, at one 
time, must have been our alliance with France, and 
how much influence must have been exercised upon 
general society by French intercourse. Scoto-Gallic 
words were quite differently situated from French 
woids and phrases adopted in England. With us 
they proceeded from a real admixture of the two 
■t)eoples. With us they were of the ordinary common 
language of the country, that was from a distant 
period moulded by French. In England, the educa- 
ted and upper classes of late years adopted French 
words and phrases. With us, some of our French 
derivatives are growing obsolete as vulgar, and nearly 
all are passing from fashionable society. In England, 
we find, the French-adopted words rather receiving 
accessions than going out of use. 

Examples of words such as we have referred to, 
as shewing a French influence and admixture, are 
familiar to many of my readers. I recollect some of 



26o Reminiscences of 

them In constant use amongst old-fashioned Scottish 
people, and those terms, let it be remembered, are 
unknown in England. 

A leg of mutton was always, with old-fashioned 
Scotch people, a gigot (fV. gigot). 

The crystal jug or decanter in which water is 
placed upon the table, was a carafF (Fr. carafe). 

Gooseberries were groserts, or grossarts (Fr. 
groseille). 

Partridges were pertricks, — a word much more 
formed upon the French perdrix than the English 
partridge. 

The plate on which a joint or side-dish wms placed 
upon the table, was an ashet (Fr. assiette). 

In the old streets of Edinburgh, where the houses 
are very high, and where the inhabitants all live in 
flats, before the introduction of soil-pipes there was 
no method of disposing of the foul water of the 
household, except by throwing it out of the window 
into the street. This operation, dangerous to those 
outside, was limited to certain hours, and the well- 
known cry which preceded the missile and warned 
the passenger, was gardeloo ! or, as Smollet writes it, 
gardy loo (Fr. garde de Teau). 

Anything troublesome or irksome used to be 
called, Scottice, fashous (Fr. facheux, facheuse) ; 
to fash one's self (Fr. se facher). 

The small cherry, both black and red, common 
in gardens, is in Scotland, never in England, termed 
gean (F"r. guigne), from Guigne, in Picardy. 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 261 

The term dam-bred (see page 106 ?) arises from 
adopting French terms into Scottish language, as 
dams were the pieces with which the game uf 
draughts was played (Fr. dames). 

A bedgown, or loose female upper garment, is 
still in many parts of Scotland termed a jupe (Fr. 
jupe). 

In Kincardineshire the ashes of a blacksmith's 
furnace had the peculiar name of smiddy-coom (Fr. 
{jcume, i.e.^ dross). 

Oil, in common Scotch, used always to be ule, 
— as the uley pot, or uley cruse (Fr. huile). 

Every one at all advanced in life could convey 
some vivid impressions of his early days, and thus 
form for the younger generation a link between their 
own and a past age. As an example of such com- 
munication, I would adduce especially the early 
portion of Lord Cockburn's book. We have al- 
ready referred to the account he gives of the ludi- 
crous and absurd system of toasts and sentiments 
which sixty years ago was a necessary evil of the 
table. Some of these domestic customs which ty- 
rannically, and one would think most uncomfortably, 
ruled society, and to which the fathers and grand- 
fathers of many of us used to bear witness, seem 
now almost too strange to be believed ; as for ex- 
ample, at a ball, the partners were never changed 
the whole evening. To a young lady, therefore, 
the first request for her hand in the dance was a 
very serious matter. An octogenarian fi'iend of 



262 Reminiscences of 

mine, in good health and spirits (Icng may he enjoy 
them ! ) has told me of his dress at the dancing- 
school balls, and which mark a considerable change 
of costume in a lifetime. A pearl grey coat, nearly 
white ; white waistcoat ; yellow or canary shorts, 
with large bunches of ribbon at the knee of the 
same colour; blue silk stockings ; pumps, with large 
bows of ribbon. Cocked hats then prevailed even 
amongst juvenile attendants. Then, again, imagine 
the dire necessity of drinking the health of every 
mortal at table every time you received a glass of 
wine or called for beer, and still worse, the irksome 
hospitality of being pressed to eat, urged to take a 
fresh supply of victuals when you had already eaten 
more than nature required, in deference to the mis- 
placed kindness of the host or hostess, nay, perhaps, 
of having an additional wing of a chicken smuggled 
on your plate when you were for a moment looking 
another way.-^ I have heard old people remark 
that they can remember the custom of the host 
saluting all lady-guests on their arrival under his 
roof. I recollect a curious account which my 
mother used to give of a custom now quite obso- 

1 There is a curious illustration of this practice of pressing 
to eat, in Miss Mure's " Remarks on the changes of manners 
in my own time, 1700- 1790." She explains it thus : " Nobody 
helped themselves at table, nor was it the fashion to eat up what 
was put on their plate. So that the mistress of the family 
might give you a full meal or not as she pleased, from whence 
came in the fashion of pressing the guests to eat, so far as to be 
disagreeable." — Calduoell Papers, page 259. 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 263 

Iste, with which the new year was ushered in at 
Edinburgh, during the time of her residence in the 
Scottish capital, soon after her marriage, which must 
have been at least seventy years ago. Persons pro 
vided themselves with what was called het pint — 
a mixture of hot ale, and rum, with switched eggs, 
sugar, and spices — with which they rushed from 
house to house of their acquaintances, and made 
them drink of it as soon as the clock had struck 
twelve and the new year had commenced j ■•• the 
great thing was to force their way into bed-rooms, 
and assail the occupants, whether in bed or not, and 
force them to drink of the het pint. Another part 
of these new year saturnalia was to stop the ladies' 
sedan-chairs (which was then the constant convey- 
ance) coming from parties ; to take out the ladies and 
salute them, a privilege then claimed by all. I recol- 
lect hearing Miss Burnett of Monboddo (a grand- 
daughter of Lord Monboddo) say, that before she 
got home on such nights her lips were sore. All 
this is very different from the quiet and unmarked 
entrance of the new year amongst us at present. It 
is scarcely observed by persons wishing each other a 
happy new year. I regret that we have not more 
reminiscences prepared y^r the purpose of elucidating 
such changes in social customs and domestic usages 

1 *' The lads weel kenning what is due, 
Their new year gifties take — 
Het pints to warm the cauldrife mou. 
And buns an' succar cakes." — NicOL. 



264 Reminiscences of 

as these. Much might be done by one person who 
would give himself to the work; for it is curious to 
think how tar back an attentive observer and chron- 
icler, who has passed middle age, might retrace old 
forgotten ways, and bring traditional knowledge to 
the light. Take my own case for example. At 
eight years of age I was consigned to the care of my 
grand-uncle, who died, at the age of ninety-one, in 
1806. He was born in J 715, so that I could have 
derived irnpressions from him of events one hundred 
and twenty-five years ago or upwards from the pres- 
ent time. Then take his traditionary and personal 
communication, and he could tell of a man and of 
what a man told him who had himself witnessed the 
execution of Charles 1. This at first sight seems 
son:iev/hat startling, but it will be quite evident on a 
moment's reflection. My uncle, at the age of fifteen, 
being then a younger son, was placed in a mercantile 
house in London ; that being in the year 1730, and 
one of the partners being aji aged man, eighty-nine 
years of age, would easily allow him to have been 
eight years old when his father took him to witness 
that fearful scene at Whitehall in 1649. ^^ could 
have told my uncle, therefore, from personal recol- 
lection, minutiae of details which would easily escape 
the pen of the historian. I would not be misunder- 
stood as if at all implying that I had actually such an 
opportunity of learning traditionary Scottish customs 
or anecdotes from this venerable relative, because, in 
fact, I learnt nothing. But I mean to shew how 



Scottish Life Sf Character, 265 

much of this information ?mght have been gained 
and h.inded dawn if parties had been observant and 
communicative. A great deal of such knowledge 
has been conveyed by Sir Walter Scott through his 
novels. Still we desiderate more conversational tra- 
ditions of personal recollection of past times. 



CONCLUSION, 



N all these details regarding the changes 



which m 



any 



now livinor have noticed to 



^{^ rtS^ have taken place in our customs and 
^ ^ habits of society in Scotland, this ques- 
tion must always occur to the thoughtful and serious 
mind, Are the changes which have been observed 
for good? Is the world a better world than that which 
we can remember ? On some important points 
changes have been noticed in the upper classes of 
Scottish society, which unquestionably are improve- 
ments. For example, the greater attention paid to 
attendance upon public worship, — the disappearance 
of profane swearing and of excess in drinking. But 
then the painful questions arise, Are such beneficial 
changes general through the whole body of our coun- 
trymen? may not the vices and follies of one grade of 
society have found a refuge in those that are of a 
lower class ? may not new faults have taken their 
place where older faults have been abandoned ? Of 
this we are quite sure, no lover of his country can fail 
to entertain the anxious wish, that the change we 
noticed in regard to drinking and swearing were 
universal, and that we had some evidence of its being 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 267 

extended through all classes of society. We ought 
certainly to feel grateful when we reflect that \n 
many instances which we have noticed, the ways and 
customs of society are much improved in common 
sense, in decency, in delicacy, and refinement. There 
are certain modes of life, certain expressions, eccen- 
tricity of conduct, coarseness of speech, books, and 
plays, which were in vogue amongst us, even fifty 
or sixty years ago, which would not be tolerated in 
society at the present time. We cannot illustrate 
this in a more satisfactory manner than by reference 
to the acknowledgment of a very interesting and 
charming old lady, who died so lately as 1823! In 
1821, Mrs. Keith of Ravelstone, grand-aunt of Sir 
Walter Scott, thus writes, in returning to him the 
work of a female novelist which she had borrowed 
from him out of curiosity, and to remind her of 
" auld lang syne : " " Is it not a very odd thing that 
I, an old woman of eighty and upwards, sitting 
alone, feel myself ashamed to read a book which, 
sixty years ago, I have heard read aloud for the 
amusement of large circles, consisting of the first 
and most creditable society in London ? " There can 
be no doubt that at the time referred to bv Mrs. 
Keith, " Tristram Shandy,"^ " Tom Jones," " Hum- 

1 Sterne, in one of his letters, describes his reading" Tristram 
Shandy' to his wife and daughter— his daughter copying from 
his dictation, and Mrs. Sterne sitting by and listening whilst 
she worked. In the life of Sterne, it is recorded that he used 
to carry about in his pocket a volume of this same work, and 



268 Reminiscences of 

phrey Clinker," etc., were on the drawing-room tables 
of ladies whose grandchildren or great-grandchildren 
Tieversaw them, or would not acknowledge it if they 
had seen them. But authors not inferior to Sterne, 
Fielding, or Smollett, are now popular, and who 
can describe the scenes of human life with as 
much force and humour, and yet there is nothing 
in their pages which need offend the taste of the 
most refined, or shock the feelings of the most 
pure. This is a change where tliere is also great 
improvement. It indicates not merely a better 
moral perception in authors themselves, but it is 
itself a homage to the improved spirit of the age. 
We will hope that, Vv'ith an improved exterior, there 
is improvement in society within. If the feelings 
shrink from what is coarse in expression, we may 
hope that vice has, in some sort, lost attraction. 
At any rate, from what we discern around us, we 
hope favourably for the general improvement of 
mankind, and of our own beloved country in par- 
ticular. If Scotland, in parting with her rich and 
racy dialect, her odd and eccentric characters, is to 
lose something in quaint humour and good stories, 
we will hope she may grow and strengthen in better 
thin2;s — <z:ood as those are which she loses. How- 
ever this may be, I feel quite assured that the ex- 
read it aloud when he went into company. Admirable reading 
for the church dignitary, the prebendary of ^'ork ! How well 
adapted to the hours of social intercourse with friends! How 
fitted for domestic seclusion with his family ! 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 269 

amples which I have now given of Scottish expres- 
sions, Scottish modes and habits of life, and Scottish 
anecdotes, which belong in a great measure to the 
past, and yet which are remembered as having a 
place in the present century, must carry conviction 
that great changes have taken place in the Scottish 
social circle. There were some things beloneins to 
our country which we must all have desired should 
be changed. There were others which we could 
only see changed with regret and sorrow. The 
hardy and simple habits of Scotsmen of many past 
generations, — their industry, economy, and integrity, 
which made them take so high a place in the es- 
timation and the confidence of the people amongst 
whom they dwelt in all countries of the world. The 
intelligence and superior education of her mechan- 
ics and her peasantry, combined with a strict moral 
and religious demeanour, fully justified the praise 
of Burns when he described the humble, though 
sublime piety of the " Cottar's Saturday Night, '* 
and we can well appreciate the testimony which he 
bore to the hallowed power, and sacred influences 
of the devotional exercises of his boyhood's home, 
when he penned the immortal words : — 

*' From scenes like these old Scotia's grandeur springs, 
That makes her loved at home, revered abroad." 

These things, we hope and trust, under the Divine 
blessing, will never change, except to increase, and 
will never become a question of reminiscences for 



270 Reminiscences of 

the past. If Scotland has lost much of the quaint 
and original character of former lawyers, lairds, and 
old ladies, much of the pungent wit and dry humour 
of sayings in her native dialect, she can afford to 
sustain the loss if she gain in refinement, and lose 
not the more solid qualities and more valuable 
characteristics by which she has been distinguished. 
If peculiarities of former days are partially becoming 
obsolete, let them at least be preserved. Let our 
younger contemporaries, let those who are to come, 
know something of them from history, as we elders 
have known something of them from experience. 
The humour and the point cannot all be lost in their 
being recorded, although they may lose much. I 
still hope to see this carried on farther by others, as 
I am convinced great additions could be made to 
these reminiscences, which I have endeavoured to 
preserve. Changes of this nature in the habits and 
language of a nation are extremely interesting, and it 
is most desirable that we should have them recorded 
as well as those greater changes and revolutions 
which it is the more immediate object of history to 
enrol amongst her annals. And, v/hether the changes 
of which we are now treating mark the deterioration 
or improvement of manners, useful lessons and im- 
portant moral conclusions may be drawn from these 
narratives of the past. Causes are at work which 
must ere long produce still greater changes, and it is 
impossible to foresee what will be the future picture 
of Scottish life, as it will probably be now becoming 



Scottish Life Sf Character. 271 

every year less and less distinguished from the rest 
of the world. But if there shall be little to mark 
our national peculiarities in the time to come, we 
cannot be deprived of our reminiscences of the past. 
As a Scotchman I am proud of the prestige which 
belong to us as a nation. I am interested in every- 
thing which is Scottish. I consider it an honour to 
have been born a Scotchman ; and one fair excuse I 
have to offer for entertaining a proud feeling on the 
subject, one proof I can adduce, that a Scottish line- 
age is considered a legitimate source of self-congratu- 
lation, and that is the fact that I never in my life 
knew an English or Irish family with Scottish rela- 
tions, where the members did not refer with much 
complacency to such national connection. I cherish 
fondly all Scottish associations. 1 am grieved to see 
our nationality fading- away. I confess to a strong 
feeling of regret and indignation when I see the in- 
difference shown by the Government (whatever 
party be in power) towards the i^^^ memorials of that 
nationality that remain. Witness the condition of 
Edinburgh Castle, Holyrood Chapel and Palace, etc., 
etc., and the indifference shown at head quarters 
regarding their preservation and restoration. But I 
have done. 1 seem to linger over these Reminis- 
cences, which now belong to a past national and social 
history, with mingled feelings of reg'-et and pleasure. 
I have, indeed, in collecting these materials, recalled 
many scenes which partake of that mixed character 
which belongs to all the concerns of human life. 



272 Reminiscences of 

But they are at any rate Scottish materials, and as 
such they are our common property, and appeal to 
our common feelings. 1 should indeed be gratified 
could 1 venture to realize the hope so kindly enter- 
tained by my good friend Dr. Clason, that these idle 
desultory pages might in some degree be the means 
of uniting Scotchmen more closely in the family 
bond, by showing theni a common ground of family 
interest. For myself, 1 think I may say, that so long 
as I have life and any mental energy remaining, 1 
shall fondly dwell on Scottish names and Scottish as- 
sociations that are past -, and that, in looking onwards 
to future times, I cherish earnestly that wish for a 
virtuous populace which was once poured forth in 
the prayer of a "patriot bard:" — 

** O Scotia ! my dear, my native soil ! 

For whom my warmest wish to heaven is sent ; 
Long may thy hardy sons of rustic toil 

Be blest with health, and peace, and sweet content." 

In such wishes let all unite in heart and tongue. 
In such feelings let our religious and political dif- 
ferences be f<irgotten. Let all the various names 
and forms of church government and church ser- 
vices merge for once into the love of country, so 
that every son and daughter of Caledonia shall cor- 
dially join in those beautiful words of the Scottish 
paraphrase, which have so often risen with accept- 
ance from the lips of crowded congregations — 
whether assembled on the Sabbath day in the midst 
of populous cities, or in the retired pastoral districts 



Scottish Life 8f Character. 27^ 

of the country, or in the wild glens of the High- 
lands : — 

" O God of Bethel, by whose hand 
Thy people still are fed : 
Who through this weary pilgrimage 
Hast all our fathers led : 

*• Our vows, our prayers, we now present 
Before thy throne of grace : 
God of our fathers ! be the God 
Of their succeeding race." 



18 



List of Proverbs quoted In these Reminiscences^ 
arranged Alphabetically . 

A BLATE cat males a proud mouse, 146. 
A bonny bride's sune buskit, 133. 
A burnt bairn fire dreads, 132. 
A dry summer ne'er made a dear peck, 134. 
Ae bird i' the hand is worth twa fleeing, 132. 
Ae swallow makes nae simmer, 132. 
A gangang fit is aye gettin, 126. 
A green Yule and a white Pays mak a fat kirk- 
yard, 138. 
All crakes, all bears, 127. 
All wald have all, all wald forgle, 126. 
An air winter maks a sair winter, 139. 
Anes payit never cravit, 126. 

A Scots mist will weet an Englishman to the skin, 138. 
A short horse is sune wispit, 133. 
A' Stuarts are na sib to the king, 134. 
As sure's deeth, 145. 
A wilfu' man should be unco wise, 147. 
A year a nurish, seven year a da, 126. 
A Yule feast may be done at Pasch, 138. 



276 Jlphahetical List of Proverbs. 

Bannocks are better nor nae kind o' bread, 140. 
Better a finger afF than aye waggin, 144. 
Better a toom house than an ill tenant, 146. 
Bluid is thicker than water, 144. 
Bourd not wi' bawtie, 127. 
Bread's house skailed never, 127. 

Cadgers are aye cracking o' crook-saddles, 145. 
Cadgers maun aye be cracking o' creels, 235. 
Crabbit was and cause had, 127. 

Dame, deem warily (ye watna wha wytes yer- 

sell), 127. 
Do as the cow of Forfar did, tak a standing 

drink, 140. 

Efter lang mint never dint, 127. 

Faint heart ne'er wan fair lady, 132. 

Fill fou and baud fou maks a stark man, 127. 

Folly is a bonny dog, 140. 

Fules male feasts and wise men eat 'em, 138. 

He has got his kail through the reek, 108. 

He is worth na weill that may not bide na wae, 128. 

He rides on the riggin o' the kirk, 143. 

He rives the kirk to theik the quire, 142. 

He should hae a lang shafted spune that sups kai] 

wi' the deil, 135. 
He's not a man to ride the water wi', 143. 



Alphabetical List of Proverbs, 277 

He that crabbs without cause, should mease without 

mends, 128. 
He that has a meikle nose thinks ilka ane speaks 

o't, 147. 
He that teaches himsel has a fule for his maister, 147. 
He that will to Cupar maun to Cupar, 144. 
His bark is waur nor his bite, 140. 
His head will ne'er fill his father's bonnet, 139. 

Pll mak Cathkin's covenant with you. Let abee 

for let abee, 145. 
Ill weeds wax weel, 132. 

It is an ill cause that the lawyer thinks shame o', 147. 
It's a sin to lee on the deil, 135. 
It's aye guid to be ceevil, as the auld wife said when 

she beckit to the deevil, 136. 
It's better to sup wi' a cutty than want a spune, 138. 
It's ill getting the breeks afF the Highlandman, 134. 
It**s ill to wauken sleeping dogs, 137, 
It 's nae mair pity to see a woman greit, nor to see 

a goose go barefit, 137. 

JouK and let the jaw gang by, 146. 

Kame sindle kame sair, 128. 

Kamesters are aye creeshie, 128. 

Keep your ain fish guts to your ain sea maws, 138. 

Kindness creeps where it canna gang, 144. 

Lang ere the deil dee by the dykeside, 135. 



278 Alphabetical List of Proverbs, 

Lang mint little dint, 127. 

Leal heart never leed, 143. 

Let ae deil ding anither, 136. 

Let alone makes mony lurden, 128. 

Let him talc a spring on his ain fiddle, 142. 

Let that flee stick to the wa', 143. 

Like a sow playing on a trump, 143. 

Lippen to me, but look to yoursell, 147. 

Lookit at the moon, and lichtit in the midden, 137. 

Mair by luck than gude guiding, 143. 

Mair whistle than woo, as the souter said when 

shearing the soo, 147. 
Mak a kirk and a mill o't, 143. 
Meat and mass hinders nae man, 139. 
Monie a thing's made for the pennie, 144. 
Mony ane speirs the gate he kens fu' v/eel, 146, 
Mony cooks ne'er made gude kail, 132. 
Mony smas mak a muckle, 132. 
Mony tynes the half mark whinger (for the halfe 

pennie whang), 128. 

Na plie is best, 128. 

O TWA ills chuse the least, 132. 

Raise nae mair deils than ye are able to lay, 136. 
Reavers should not be rewers, 128. 
Ruse the fair day at e'en, 141. 



Jlphabetical List of Proverbs, 279 

Seil comes not till sorrow be o'er, 129. 
Seil o' your face, 129. 
Set a knave to grip a knave, 132. 
Set a stout heart to a stey brae, 133. 
She's better than she's bonny, 133. 
Sokand seill is best, 129. 

The Deil and the Dean begin vi^i' ae letter, when 
the Deil has the Dean, the kirk will be the bet- 
ter, 136. 

The deil's a busy bishop in his ain diocie, 136. 

The deil's aye gude to his ain, 136. 

The deil's bairns hae deil's luck, 136. 

The deil's gane ower Jock Wabster, 137. 

The deiPs nae sae ill as he's caaed, 135. 

The e'ening brings a' hame, 141. 

The king's errand may come the cadger's gate yet, 
142. 

The kirk is meikle, but ye may say mass in ae end 
o't, 142. 

The maut is aboon the meal, 143. 

The men o' the Mearns manna do mair than they 
may, 145. 

The tod ne'er sped better than when he gaed his ain 
errand, 147. 

The water will never warr the widdie, 134. 

There's aye water where the stirkie drouns, 144. 

There's mae madines nor makines, 129. 

There's nae fule to an auld fule, 132. 

Twa wits are better than ane, 132. 



28o Alphabetical List of Proverbs. 

Wha will bell the cat, 139. 

When the castle of Stirling gets a hat, the carse of 

Corntown pays for that, 146. 
When the dirt's dry, it will rub out, 144. Notg. 

Ye are as lang in tuning your pipes as anither would 

play a spring, 135. 
Ye bried of the gouk, ye have not a rhyme but ane, 

229. 
Ye canna mak a silk purse o' a sow's lug, 132. 
Ye fand it whar the Highlandman fand the tangs, 

139- 
Ye gae far about seeking the nearest, 147. 
Ye hae tint the tongue o' the trump, 139. 
Ye'Il mend when ye grow better, 147. 
Ye'll no sell your hen in a rainy day, 147. 
Ye're nae chicken for a' your cheepin, 147. 
Ye wad do little for God an the deevil was dead, 

136. 



INDEX. 



A beautiful burial, 179. 

' A' the parish kens Jenny Robertson,' 230. 

Abercairnie, Laird of, 215. 

Aberdeen, wife of Provost of, 118. 

Aberdonian ladies' anecdote, 118, 119. 

Adam, Dr., anecdote, 81. 

* Ae, ae, but oh I'm sare hadden doun wi' the bubbly jock,' 186. 
i^sthetic movement in religion, 32. 

"A fair drinker,' 49. 

Affecting story of an idiot boy, 188, 189. 

* A great broon pig,' 106. 

A horse the length of Highgate, 104. 

* Aiblins a hunner,' 172. 

* Aiblins ye're no sae popular i' the parish as me,' 191. 
Airlie, Lord, and his tenant, 176. 

Amusements of the people, 244. 

* An I hadna been an idiot I wad hae been sleeping, too,' 187. 

* And ye've as muckle need, sir,' 154. 

Arecdote of a Scotch farmer, and a Cheshire reaper, 215. 
Anecdote of Mr. M of Glasgow, 38. 

* Ane o' them 's grippit me fine,' 88. 
Angus and Aberdeen dialects, 115. 
Angus laird, and the London merchant, 44. 
Angus, Lord, Bell the Cat, 139, 



282 ^ Index, 

Angus old ladies, 79. 

Angus u'ords used by old people, 105. 

Anither het day, cornal,' 85. 
Answers of servants illustrating habits and manners of the 

time, 73. 74' 
rt.ms' nest, 200. 
Arbroath theatricals, 181, 

- Are ye a speerit ? ' 240. 

- Are ye aiie o' the toon council ?' 102. 

* Are yer aits muckle bookit th' year ? ' 200. 
Argyle, Duke of, and the Edinburgh Magistrates, 104 
Armadale's, Lord, dinner party, 212. 

Asher, Rev. Mr., of Inveraven, 185. 
Astronomical speuuiaiion, 152. 
Athole, Duke of, and the Perth writer, 28. 
Athole, Duke of, the lave, 167. 
Auld lang syne, bi. 

* Aweel, gudewife, then tiie itss I lee,' 1 1 1. 

* Ay, ay, sir, but indeea it was yersel began it,' 194. 

* Ay, a' ae 00,' 87. 

'Ay, mony a ane has complained o' that hole,' 153. 
' Ay, sir, whare ye gaun ? ' 67. 

* Aye, but fatten fat Thamas Ihamson,' 118, 

Baad whusky, 39. 
Back-speired, iii. 

Bailie 's eldest son, 102. 

Baird, Mrs., of Newbyth, and her son, 91. 

Balfour's edition of Ray's Proverbs, 122. 

Balnamoon's ' waile o' wigs' on Munrimmon Mulr, 161 ; speal 

o' drinking,' 162. 
Bannockburn, 258. 
Baptismal ceremonies, 223, 224. 
Beadle or betheral, 189, 235, 236. 
Beattie, Dr., Scotticisms designed to correct improprieties of 

speech and writing, 103. 



Index. 2 (S3 



* Beddle-looking bodies,' 190. 
Beggars, 167, 168, 228. 

* Bend weel to the Madeira at dinner,* 47. 
Bestial, 105. 

Bethune, Dr., of Dornoch, anecdote, 217, 

* Bide a wee, doctor,' etc., 196. 

Births, Marriages, and Deaths, ceremonies, 223. 

Bishop of Exeter, 105. 

Black sheep or white sheep, 207. 

* Boaty * of the Dee at Banchory ; his Idea of a perfect gentle- 

man, 69. 
Bobbins, her cure for a cold, 177. 
Boiled beef and greens, 156. 
Boswell, James, ' falling into a habit which still prevails in 

Scotland,' 45. 
Braxfield on the law of marriage, 226. 
Brougham, Lord, on Scottish language, 82. 
Brown, George, Lord Coalstoun, 163. 
Brown, John, of Whitburn, anecdote of, 35. 
Buccleuch, Duchess of, and the farmer, 156. 
Buchanan, George, 174. 
Builder's views of church differences, 31. 
Burnett, Bishop, * Memoirs of my own Time,* 25. 
Burns, Robert, 60, 62, 83, 149, 150. 

* But, indeed, our Jean thinks a man perfect salvation,' 98 

* But, Lord, hoo tired the fowk whiles are,' 197. 

* But my minnie dang, she did tho',' 170. « 

* But the bodies brew the braw drink,' 169. 
Byron, quotation from Don Juan, 141. 

Cadger at Duntrune, 177. 
Caldwell papers quoted, 262, note* 
Campbell of Combie, 154. 
Campbell, Dr., 150. 
Campbell of Jura, anecdote, 159. 

* Can she make good collops ? ' 99. 



284 



Index, 



* Can the creature sew ony ? ' 248. 

Canine misbehaviour in church, 194. 

Carmunnock. Church, 221. 

Carnegy, Miss Helen, of Craigo, 96, 99, loi. 

Castlemilk servants, 234. 

Cathkin's Covenant, 146. 

Chalmers, Dr., and his congregation in the West Port, 41 ; 

and the anecdote at Kilmany, 227. 
Chambers, R., Domestic Annals of Scotland, 14; anecdote, 

117, 175, 224. 
Chambers, William, contributions, 50, 187. 
Changes in religious observances; 32, 34. 
Changes in Scottish language, 78. 
Chesterfield, Lord, on proverbs, 122. 
Chisholm, Mrs., of Chisholm, 106. 
Christmas and Martinmas, 166, 167. 
Church attendance, 26. 
Church architecture, a new era, 31, 
Church decoration, 29. 
Churchyard gossip, 76. 
Clason, Rev. Dr., reminiscences, 218-245. 
Clephane, depute-advocate, 48. 

Clerk-Rattray, the late baron's opinion of betherals, 190. 
Clerk, John, Lord Eldin, 120. 
Clock, 109. 
Club, social and convivial records of an old Edinburgh soci- 

, ety, 60, 61. 
Coalstoun dining-room window, 163. 
Cockburn, Lord, Memorials, 19, 48, 49, s^^ 9°* 93) 94» 

* Come awa, granny,' 158, 159. 

Come oot and see a new star that hasna got its tail cuttit afF 
yet,' 152. 

* Consignation money,' 225. 
Convivial habits, 43. 
Cookery, Scotch, 257. 
Corb, 165, 



Index, 285 



Carehouse, Lord (Cranstoiin), 48. 
Costume at dancing-school balls, 262. 
Coutts, John, anecdote of, 50. 
Craigmyle's breeks, 164. 

• Cry a' thegither, that's the way to be served,' 73. 
Cunninghame, Lady Elizabeth, 205. 

*Daft circuit,' 48. 

Daft Will Speir, 188. 

Daft Yedie, 188. 

Dalhousie, Christian, Countess of, reminiscences, 162, 

Dalzell manse, 220. 

Dam-brod, 107. 

Dance music of Scotland, 250. 

Deaf lady and the Marquis of Lothian, 216. 

Deaths and funerals, 226. 

• 'Deed, Robby, then, ye needna be sae nice ; he'll juist tak ye 

as ye are,' 98. 
Deeside humorists, 69. 
Deeside stories, 163. 

Denholm, Saunders, and his mistress, 235, 
Dialects, 1 15. 

Dickson, Dr. David, anecdote of a Scottish termagant, 197. 
Diminutives in frequent use, 109. 
Diminutives, Scottish, use of, 110. 
Dining hours, late, 62, 
Discreet, 105. 

Disruption in the Church of Scotland, 32. 
Dog stories, 74, 169. 
Domestic servants, 6^. 
Drawing an inference, 193. 
Drinking anecdote, 54. 

Drinking Angus laird and the London merchant, 44. 
Drinking fair, 49, 244. 
Drinking habits, 46. 
Drinking parties, 54. 



286 Index. 

Ducklnfield (Sir Nathaniel), and the * ill-natured' stories, of 

Montrose, 34. 
Dun, Finlay, 96. 

Dunblane Cathedral, unroofed by Montrose's followers, 242. 
Dundas, Henry, Viscount Melville, and Mr. Pitt, 104. 
Dundonald, Laird of, his funeral, 53. 
Dunlop, Watty, 199. 
Dunse, Dull, and Drone parishes, xvii. 
Duntrune cadger, 177. 
Duntrune cook, 178. 

Eating (anecdote of a ' full-eating laird '), 64. 

* Ech, sirs! what a nicht for me to be fleeing thro' the air,' 9'?, 
Edinburgh magistrates and the ' dukes and fools,' 104. 
Education, 89. 

Eglinton Papers, quoted, 145. 

* Eh, man, your psalm-buik has been ill bund,' 198. 

* Eh, our minister had a great power 0' watter,' 191. 

* Eh, mem, do they ca' skirling like yon, singing,' 251. 
Elizabeth and the ' lang grace and nae meat,' 158. 
Enterteening, 106. 

Erskine, Colonel, and his old servant, 232 ; his choleric tem- 
perament, 233. 
Erskine of Dun, anecdote, 67. 
Erskine, Henry, 212. 
Erskine, Miss, of Dun, 79, 94, 221. 
Erskine, Rev. Dr., anecdote, 233. 
Erskine, William, 48. 

* Esther, ye hae nae gotten the spune ? ' 95. 
Exquisite astronomical speculation, 152. 

Fail, 107. 

Family prayer, practice of, 33. 
Famine of 1800, Dr. Clason's recollections, 237. 
'Fan he's had time to curse a fyllie, I'se vvarran' he'll seen be 
weel eneuch,' 246. 



Index. 287 



• Fa's findln' faut wi' the day ? ' 174. 
Fasque dining-room, 88. 

* Fat did he dee o' ? ' 117. 

' Fat for should I gang to the opera, just to creat a confee- 
sion.' 118. 

• Fatten fat Thamas Thamson ? ' 118. 
Fencing the deil^ 20^. 
Fergusson's Scottish Proverbs, 122. 
Ferguson, W., Poems, 58-60, 83, n6. 
Fettercairn ChurcTi, 253. 
Fielding's Tom Jones, 266. 

* Fin' a fardin for yersell, puir body,' 168. 
Finnan Haddies, 116. 

* Fond o' my landlord ! ' 95. 

Forbes, Sir William, anecdote, 29 ; Memoirs of a Banking- 
house, 50. 
Forfarshire lady and her servant Andrew, 75. 
Forfarshire lady, 91. 
Frail, 107. 

F^raser, John, and the goose that ' had but ae leg,' 178. 
Funeral customs in Hamilton, 227. 
Funerals, Highland, 53, 54. 

Gaelic clergy, 52. 
Galloway dialect, 116. 
Gait's Annals of the Parish, 150. 
Games, 256. 

•Get up ! I wadna rise out o' my chair for King George him- 
sell,' 103. 

• Gey impudent o' him, I think,' 93. 
Gilchrist, Dr., and his parishioner, 202. 
Gillespie, Professor, 208, 210. 
Gipsies, 229. 

Glasgow Cathedral, 31. 

Glenorchy, Wilhelmina, Viscountess, her church and resting, 
place, 206. 



288 Index, 

Golf am! curling, 256. 

Gordon, Jai:c, Duchess of, and the Laird of Cralgmyle, 163; 

anecdote, 79. 
Gow, Nathaniel, 250. 
Gow, Neil, 250. 
Graham, Miss Stirling, of Duntrune, 'Mystifications,' 172; 

' Worthies,' 173. 
Graham, Mrs., of Balmure, and Saunders Hay, 173. 
Greyfriars' Church, 31. 

* Grippit a chiel for the powny,' 88. 
Grippy, 88. 

* Gude coorse country wark,' 192. 

* Had Skinner been of carnal mind,' etc. 211. 
Haddo's Hole precentor, 191. 

Haddock, 108, 116. 

Hamilton, Duke of, and the shoemaker, 224; and the pugilist, 

239- 
Hamilton the sma sma laird, anecdotes, 165, 166. 
HandePs oratorios, 248. 
Honest, 108. 
Harvest, thanksgiving for, 204. 

* Hech, man, div ye no ken there's aye maist sawn o' the best 

crap ? ' 76. 

* Hech, sirs ! and he is weel pat on, too,' 257. 
Henderson's Scottish Proverbs, 123, 131. 

Henry, Reverend Dr., and his colleague Dr. Macknight, 196. 

* Here's to a' the company's gude health, except my Lord Privy 

■ Seal and Lady Betty Mackenzie,' 175. 
Hermand, Lord, convivial habits, 48,49. 
Het pint, 263. 
Highland funerals, 53. 

* Holy minister ! congregation ! O my head maun be cuttit 

aff,' 186. . 
Hor^e, John, epigram, 213. 
Hoot, sir, 209. 



Index, 289 



Hume, David, rehearsing the Creed, 40 ; * his weebukies,' no. 
Hummelcorn discourse (/. ^., a poor sermon), 79. 
Humour in children, 157. 
Humorist minister and hearer, 202. 

• I didna ken ye were i* the toun,' 79. 
Idiots, 183. 

• If I dinna get it, I'll tell thon,' 159. 

• If there's an ill text in a' the Bible that creetur's aye sure to 

tak it,' 40. 

• I just fan' a doo in the redd o' my plate,' 64, 
' Ilka ane had a hen boiled in broth,' 176. 

• I'm no surprised at it, considering the trash that comes aff your 

stamach in the morning,' 171. 

• Indeed, I maun hae a lume that '11 had in,' 161. 

' Indeed, minister, there's mair leears in Peebles than me,' 187. 

• Indeed, there's neither men nor meesic, and fat care I for 

meat,' 118, 

• Indeed, sir, I'm just as little the better,' 94. 

' In my situation ! and whan were ye in my situation ?' 96. 
Inquisitiveness, national, 153. 

• I should like to know who is the head of this house,' 204. 
' Is it lawful at ony time to tell a lee ? ' 184. 

• Is your ladyship inclined to take fish,' 216. 

• It's no the day to be speering sic things,' 38, 

• It stoors in an oor,' 79. 

• I wadna gie my single life for a' the double anes I ever saw, 

76.^ 

• I wadna gie the crack i' the kirkyard for a' the sermon,' 77, 

• I wadna hae the walkers, and the riders gaed by,' 137. 

• It wou'd na gang wast in spite o' me,' 85. 

• I was married to a moudiewart last,' 182. 

• It's no my wig, Hairy, lad,' 160, i6i, 
Italian singing, 25 1. 

Jacobite anecdotes, 41, 43* 

Id 



290 Index, 

• James, the notes are not correct,* 155, 

• John, carry that dog out,' 193. 
Johnstone, Miss, of Westerhall, 92, 

* Jemmy, you are drunk 1* 169. 
Judges, Scottish, 119 

Kail, 108. 

Keith, Mrs., 267. 

Kelly's Scottish Proverbs, 123, 124. 

Kemble in Macbeth, remark on, by a Scotch farmer, 105, io6. 

♦ Kind sir, it's for your courtesie,' etc., 212. 

Ladies, old Scottish, 90. 
Lamb, Charles, on Scottish wit, 149. 
Laudamy and calomy, 258. 
Lauderdale, Earl of, and his son, 213. 
Layal, Jamie, and the turkies, 72. 

• Leeve ! hoo could she leeve ? ' 99. 

Letter from an old Montrose lady to her niece in England, smd 

reply, 112, 113. 
Liston, Sir Robert, 84. 
Logic church, 221 ; old minister, 243. 
Long sermons, 197. 

* Lord pity the chiel that's chained to our Davy,' 92. 
Lothian, Marquis of, and his workmen, 73; anecdote, ai6. 

Mackenzie, Henry, anecdote, 54. 

Macnab, laird of, and his horse, 164. 

MacNabb, Miss, of Bar-a'-Chaistril, 155. 

Macknight, Rev. Dr., and his colleague Dr. Henry, 196. 

* Ma new breeks were made oot o' the auld curtains,' 159. 
Marriage ceremonies, 224. 

Matthews, Mrs. Westhall, 175. 
Matthews, Charles, 195. 
Matthew, Meg, and her 'bairns,' 179. 
Maule, Mr., and the Laird of Skene, 45. 



Index, 2Q1 



Mearns, words used in the, 119. 

• Me bird ! I dinna ken corn frae gerse,* 188. 
Melville, Viscount, anecdote, 104. 
Midlothian Scotch, 83. 

Military rank attached to ladies, 257. 
Monday, superstition regarding, 173. 
Montrose ladies, 93-103. 
Montrose, provost of, and the old lady, 95, 96 

• Mony a ane has complained o' that hole,* 153. 

• Mony thanks, mem, I dinna need it,' 156. 
Mrs. Mary Smith and Miss Peggy FyfFe, 173, 
Mure, Mrs., of Caldwell, and David Hume, no. 
Murray, Mrs., of Abercairney, and the salt spoon, 71. 
Music, Scottish, 249. 

• My lady, gie us less o' your mainers, and mair o* your siller,' 

206. 
Mystifications, 172. 

• Na, na, my leddy, I druve ye to your marriage,' 67, 
«Na,''Naa,'* Naaa,' 86. 

• Na, na, he's no just deep, but he's drumly,' 71. 

• Na, na, I dinna serve the deevil ; I serve ae single lady,' 76. 
' Na, na, minister, juist ye come up wi' me,' 184. 

' Na, na, I never write onything o' consequence,' 91, 

• Na, Janet, deil as muckle as that't ever ye saw,' 170. 
Nanny Bilson, 229. 

National inquisitiveness, 153. 

• Neebour, wad ye sit a bit wast ? ' 84. 
Newbattle servants, 74. 

Newcastle, Duke of, and the Provost of Edinburgh, 104. 

• News I oh I ' 102. 
New-year celebrations, 263. 
Nichol in his shirt sleeves, 75. 

• Od, Charlie Brown, what gars ye hae sic lang steps to vour 

front door ? ' 163. 



292 Index. 

• O, doctor, doctor ! you'll kill me,' 185. 

• Od, ye're a lang lad ; God gie ye grace,' 94. 

• Oh, he's a whistlekirk minister,' 30. 

• Oh, I hae seen the pretty man,' 189. 

• Oh, I wush that I was dry,' 196. 
*Oh, mem, it's varra enterteening,' 106. 

• Oh, Mr. Divet,' 100. 

• Oh that men would therefore praise the Lord,' 26. 

• O my head maun be cuttit aflf,' 186. 

• On the contrary, sir,' 154. 

• Ony dog micht sune become a greyhound by stopping here,' 

169. 
Organs and Liturgies, 30. 

• Ou ay, man ; senselessly ceevll,' 97. 

• Ou, it's varra bonny, varra bonny,* 30. 

• Ou, it's juist a bit queanie,' 177. 

• Our John sweers awfu',' 28. 

' Our Jean thinks a man perfect salvation,' 98. 

• Oo ? ay, a' ae 00,' 87. 

• Ou ay, it's a cauf,' 120, 

• Our minister had a great power o' waiter,' 19 1. 
•Our Watty Dunlop,' 198. 

Parish idiots, anecdotes of, 182-190. 

Paul, Rev. Dr., of St. Cuthberts, 183. 

Paul's girdle, 157. 

Paul, Saunders, an innkeeper at Banchory, 45, 63, 69. 

Peculiarities yet remaining, 257. 

Penny weddings, 225, 

Penurious laird and the beggar, 168. 

Perth, Lady, and the French gentleman, 93 

Pig, 106. 

Political partialities, 41. 

Polkemmet, Lord, anecdotes, 119. 

• Poor auld bodies could be nae terror to ony body,' 193. 
Porteous Mob, 104, 



Index, 293 



Pronunciation, 109. 
Prophet's Chalmer, 205. 
Proverbial expressions, 121. 
Proverbs, 125-147. 
Public rooms, 256, 

Raiment fit,* 158. 
Ramsay (Sir A.), and Jamie Layal, 71, 72, 
Ramsay, Allan, 83. 
Ramsay's Scots Proverbs, 123, 130, 
Ramsay, Sir George, and Corb, i6j. 
Ramsays, Miss, of Balmain, 99. 
Rax me a spaul o' that bubbly jock, 80. 
Ray's English Proverbs, 123. 

Religious feelings and religious observances, 25-42. 
Religious feeling among the Scottish peasantry, 37, 38. 
Resisting the deevil, 204. 
Rhubarb tart, 156. 
Ripin' the ribs, 80. 

Robertson, Principal, and the country minister, 47, 
Roads, Highland, 152. 
Russell, Mr., of Blackha', 69. 
Rutherfurd, Lord, and the Bonally shepherd, 37. 

Sabbath desecration, 37-39. 

Sandford, Bishop, experience of church-going, 26. 
* Sandy' and his mistress, 68. 
Sand-glass in churches, 254. 
Sappho, quotation from, 141, 
Sax feet in length, 32. 
Sentiments, 56-62. 

*Sen' for that preaching man frae Livingstone,' 214. 
Scoto-Gallic words and phrases, 259-261. 
Scott, Sir Walter, dedication of Waverley Novels, xvii. 
Scott, Sir Walter, and Selkirk writer, 48 ; his novels, 26, 104, 
140, 142. 



294 Index. 



Scottish conviviality, 43-64. 

Scottish judges, 119. 

Scottish humour and proverbs, 78, 

Scottish ministers, xvii. 

Scottish music, 249. 

Scottish stories of wit and humour, 148. 

Scottish domestic servant, 6^. 

Scottish beadles, 189, 195. 

Scotsman newspaper, anecdote from, 211, 254. 

Servants, old Scottish, (>s-ll-> 232-236. 

* She's vicious upo' the wark,' 76. 
' She's lichter of a laddie,' 223. 

* She had a tappie-tourie on her head,' 175. 

Shirra, Mr., the Seceding minister, anecdotes of, 199. 
Silly, 107. 

* Sinclair, Sir John, observations on the Scottish dialect, 

103. 

* Sir, ye're breaking something there forbye the stanes ! * 

37- 

* Sir, your hospitality borders upon brutality,' 44. 

* Sir, I'm the lad that's to lowse the neckcloths,' 56. 

* Sic a speat of praying,' etc, 162. 
Skene, Laird of, and Mr. Maule, 45. 
Skinner, Bishop John, 245. 
Skinner, Rev. John, 211, 212. 
Smith, Adam, anecdote of, 257. 

Smith, Sydney, preaching in Edinburgh, 26, 148, 149. 

Smith, Sydney, on Scottish 'wut,' 149. 

Smith, Mrs. Mary, and Miss Peggy Fyffe, 173. 

Smollett's Humphrey Clinker, 267. 

Smugglers, 240, 

Solitary Highland road, 152. 

* Solomon would be thocht naething 0' noo,' 89. 

* Some fowk like parritch, and some like paddocks,* 93. 
Songs of Scotland, 250. 

Solon's saying, 141. 



Index, 295 



South Leith Church, 31. 
Spring butter, 99. 

Sterne, Lawrence, Tristram Shandy, 267. 
Stirling of Keir and the miller of Keir, 43. 
Stirling of Keir, admirable lecture on Proverbial philosophy, 
123, 131. 

* Stour out o' the cushion ! ' 191. 
Strong-minded lady and the cook, 99. 
St. Giles' betheral, 192. 

Stained glass, 30. 

Stewart, Honourable Mrs., and her servant Jeannie, 38. 

Stuart, Lady, of Castlemilk, 221. 

Stuart, Sir Michael Shaw, and his old servant Peter, 234. 

Suppers in Scotland, S5' 

Sunday intimations, 234. 

Superstitious, 108. 

Sutherland's, Duke of, funeral, 54. 

Sutherland, Colonel Alexander, anecdote, 217. 

Swearing habits, 27. 

Swearing at lairge, 28. 

Symson, Andrew, minister of Kirkinner, ri6, nottf. 

* Tak that — Let them fecht wha like,' 215. 

* Take out that dog ; he'd vvauken a Glasgow magistrate,* 

195- 
Tavern suppers, ^$, 
Taylor the manager and his father, 174. 

* Then I'm sure it maun be broon paper,' 99. 
Thorn, Provost, and Miss Carnegy of Craigo, 96. 
Thom, Rev. Mr., 195. 

* The bairns to ae house, and the meat to anither,' 167. 
*The less I lee,' iii. 

* They've drunken sax gang o' watter,' 50. 
There's a whun-buss at your horse's catastrophe, 210, 

* Todbrae banes,' 195. 
Toasts and rounds, 55-64. 



296 



Index, 



* Toot, a glass 0' whisky is to me just like a flea in a coal-pit,' 

229. 
' Try ye him wl' ten,* 172. 
Tractarianism in Scotland, 29. 
Trinity College Church, 255. 

* Twa beddle-looking bodies,' 190. 
Tweeddale, Lord, 74. 

Tytler, Patrick, life, 89, 106. 

Usages in old parish churches, 235. 

Waile o' wigs, i6r, 

* Wakh o' images there,* 29. 

* We hae a' thing, we're no married,' 100. 

* We are bits o' Glasgow bodies,' no. 
Wedderburn of Pearsie and the cook, 178. 

* Weel, maister ghaist, is this a general rising, or are ye juist 

taking a daunder frae your grave by yersell ? ' 199. 
' Weel, hoo the deil do ye ken whether this be the road or no? * 
188. 

* What ails ye at her wi' the green gown ? ' 7 1. 
•What a big lee ! it's a caufF,' 67. 

' Whatna hummel-doddie o' a mutch hae ye gotten ? ' 79. 
*Whaur?'87. 

* Whaur's this you're gaun, Robby ? ' 98. 
Whlstlekirk minister, 30. 

* Who is the head of this house ? ' 204. 
'Who says I'm afraid to pass the dirt-pot ? * 52. 

Whun ye get cheenge for a saxpence, it's soon slippit awa,' 

86. 
Whisky toddy, first mention of, in an Edinburgh club 

61. 
Wilson, John, the vocalist, 96. 
Wilson, Professor, 149. 
Wut, Scottish, 149. 



Index. 297 

• Ye a' speak sae genteel now that I dinna ken wha s Scotch/ 

89. 

* Ye are ower pridefu', Davie Miller,' 176. 

* Ye'd soon be kickit out o' that,' 88. 

* Ye may hae that profit, but honour ye hae nane,' 102. 

♦ Ye'll aften see a light peeping through a crack,' 199. 

• Your Grace maun alloo it's a vera windy vegetable,' 156. 



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